


Like the Sun, but Inside of You

by airbendandsnap



Series: Like the Sun, but Inside of You (Zukaang) [1]
Category: Avatar (TV), Avatar: Legend of Korra, Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Adultery, Age Difference, Alcohol, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst and Feels, Arrow dick, Ba Sing Se, Cheating, Coming of Age, Forbidden Love, Funny, Gay, Guilt, Honor, Humor, Lemon, Lolita, Lolita!Aang, M/M, Magical Tattoos, Marriage, Multi, Oral Sex, References to Drugs, Republic City, Romance, Rough Sex, Smut, Taboo, Temptation, Zukaang - Freeform, Zuko's POV, life story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-19
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2018-10-20 20:27:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 44,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10670172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/airbendandsnap/pseuds/airbendandsnap
Summary: Can an obsession ever turn into platonic friendship?Three years after the defeat of Firelord Ozai, Aang and Zuko are hard at work building the Republic of Nations. When Zuko hears about the Avatar's breakup, it sets into motion a lifetime of romance, passion, and betrayal. It's a decision he's had to make before: chasing honor or following his heart. And, like before, he realizes the two are intertwined.[Fits canonically with Avatar, LoK, and the comics]





	1. The Avatar and the Firelord

**Author's Note:**

> This story will cover key points in Zuko and Aang's relationship up until Aang's death and will include an epilogue after that. I can't predict how many chapters it will be, as this is my first multi-chapter fic, but it's going to be pretty lengthy.
> 
> I originally started this story during the events of Book 3, but the pre-established story from Zuko's point of view felt clumsy as I wrote it. Instead, I will eventually post that part of the story separately as a prequel. I've used canon from the graphic novels to write this. At the time of this posting, it's about a week until the final installment of North and South comes out, and the Legend of Korra comics are not yet out.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

In many ways, Zuko was grateful for the trips that took him away from his palace in the Capitol City, Caldera. The air seemed lighter here, and though he was long past the days when he could roam the Earth Kingdom anonymously, its citizens were content to acknowledge him and then let him get back to work, not shake his hand and schmooze with him like the would-be social climbers of the Fire Nation. During late nights huddled around that small wooden table with Aang, using the large dusty chalkboard hanging on the wall to map out ideas that changed too quickly to commit to paper, Zuko felt like he was on the brink of something huge. It was like the first time he’d conjured a small flame in his palm at the age of six. The United Republic of Nations was a wildfire just starting to grow, and one day its capitol was going to shine as bright as lightning. The only perk Caldera held compared to the site of the future capitol city was that Mai was there, but the time apart kept their relationship from becoming tedious. Most of the time.

At this point, the city consisted of a few portable buildings and a whole lot of land neatly bent into a flat canvas. Zuko and Aang were working closely with the Department of Civil Bending and Planning to create the landscape of the city. Aang wanted to wait until they had the entire city mapped out to start building. Zuko secretly felt that might take away a bit of the charm, but he tended to defer to Aang on matters of likability.

Currently, Aang had Avatar business to attend to, so Zuko was going alone to meet Toph in the Department of Corrections to discuss her ideas for the future police force of Republic City.

When he walked into the portable, Toph was tipped back in her chair with her legs crossed on the desk in front of her and her fingers laced behind her head. As Zuko closed the door, she leaped to her feet, assuming the posture that meant she was using her bending to see him. Though most of the portables in the city were raised slightly off the ground and accessible by steps, the Department of Corrections sat flush against the land. 

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite autocrat! Good to see you, Sparky!”

Zuko embraced her, glad she couldn’t see him wince at her tight grip. “Greetings, Chief.”

Toph laughed, releasing him. “Can’t really be a chief before I have the police force.” 

“In due time, Bei Fong.”

Zuko made himself comfortable in the plush chair across from Toph’s desk while she made them coffee on the little stove in her office’s kitchen. Much to Uncle Iroh’s dismay, Toph had become a hardened coffee drinker recently, around the time she turned sixteen. 

She returned with two large mugs of the blackest, most viscous coffee Zuko had ever seen. Hesitant to take a sip, he left it on the desk to cool.

Sitting across from him, Toph blew on the top of her coffee, then took a big throaty gulp. “That’s the stuff,” she said, smacking her lips. She set the cup down and resumed the laid-back position Zuko had found her in.

“Alright, brass tacks. As you know, my bending academy has produced a few successes. Some better than others, but it is now confirmed that a fair amount of earth benders can be trained to work with metal.”

Zuko narrowed his eyes. “I thought your message said you wanted to talk about the police force.”

“It’s relevant, dingus,” said Toph smugly. “As I was saying, it’s been clearly proven that if enough earth benders are taught the finer points of metalbending, a decent percentage of them will be able to perform and eventually master it. Now here’s where my genius comes into play. I believe that a police task force comprised entirely of metal benders would have the best chance at controlling crime in this city. Because it is such a rare skill set, it would give us the edge in matters of conflict.” 

Zuko took a sip of coffee to allow himself a moment to reflect. It was like mud in his mouth. He willed himself to swallow, then set the mug down slowly.

“You say it’s a rare skill set, but also that most earth benders could learn it with proper training. So how is it any more of an edge than, say, training firebenders to bend lightning?”

Toph grinned widely and more smugly than ever. “Because in order to be properly trained, you need to learn from a master. And currently, the only master is yours truly.”

“And the people you’ve trained.”

“Right. My devotees.”

“You’re sure no one else will organically figure out how to metal bend? Especially now that they know it’s physically possible?”

Toph shrugged and sat upright, taking a loud slurp from the mug she gripped with both hands. “I can’t be sure of anything. But I am confident that if you allow me to exclusively train metal benders for the force, I’ll make sure we operate as a cohesive and formidable unit. Imagine me, times a couple dozen.”

Zuko smiled. “That does sound scary.” Zuko had known a lot of terrifying teenage girls in his life, so Toph didn't phase him, but he was glad to have nearly always been on her good side.

“Why thank you, Sparky.” 

“I’ll run in by Aang when he gets back from his Avatar thing.”

“Avatar thing?” Toph wrinkled her nose. “What Avatar thing?”

“What—? Yeah, that’s why he’s not here right now. Avatar business. Happens all the time? You do know our friend Aang is the Avatar, right?”

“Don’t be cute with me! I know all about Avatar things! But that’s not why Aang isn’t here. He was at the Southern Water Tribe. To see Katara.”

Blood rushed to Zuko’s face. “What the hell! We had important things to do and he told me he couldn’t be here. And he’s off penguin sledding with Katara? That’s—”

“Zuko!” exclaimed Toph, her blank green eyes open wide. She only ever used his name when she was done joking around. “They weren’t fucking penguin sledding, god. Katara called him there to break up with him.”

Zuko blinked. His face was still burning and a strange numbness was spreading in his chest. “Are you serious?”

Toph nodded sadly. “It’s been sort of a long time coming.”

Zuko shook his head, leaning back into his chair. “That’s so… I can’t believe she made him travel all the way there to get his heart broken!”

“It wasn’t like that! It was mutual. Aang knew they had to call it off and just wanted it to be in person.”

“Wait… wait.” Zuko ran a hand through his hair, knocking his topknot askew. “How do you know all this?” 

“Katara and I talk about it all the time. She’s been writing me a lot since she’s been home. She’s my best friend,” Toph added, somewhat defensively.

“Well Aang is my best friend, and he has never once hinted that he’s any less than madly in love with Katara.”

“Ugh, Sparky, you’re killing me. Of course he loves Katara. Of course Katara loves Aang! But hello! That is one passionless union if I ever saw one. He is spending all his time in this city and on ‘Avatar stuff.’ And Katara has her own responsibilities urbanizing the Southern Water Tribe. Not to mention, she’s a beautiful vibrant woman who has been taking a backseat to the fate of the world for three years. It’s not personal, just not the right time for them.”

Zuko made a face. “You literally sound exactly like Katara.”

“That was a word-for-word quote.”

“‘Beautiful vibrant woman?’”

“A poet she is not.”

Zuko sighed and took a long sip of his coffee, barely tasting it. No one loved a girl more than Aang loved Katara. Zuko figured Mai was probably the love of his life—there had to be a reason they could never give each other up completely. But he would be the first to admit they each had a hard time putting the other first. Too much pride, or something. Probably a by-product of being raised in nobility. 

“There’s no way Aang is handling this well,” he said, wondering if he was betraying Aang by saying so. But Toph knew him just as well as Zuko.

“Yeah,” she sighed. “Actually, Katara told me that Sokka was planning to come back here with Aang, to make sure he doesn’t—you know. Freak out.”

“Right,” muttered Zuko. “Huh. I should probably spend some time with him too.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. There was so much work he had wanted to get done in the next few days, but Aang would be useless while nursing a broken heart. “Do you know if they’re coming back tomorrow morning? That’s what Aang said when he lied to me about being on Avatar business.”

“Of course he frickin’ lied to you, Sparky! Getting dumped by your girlfriend isn’t very impressive! He just wants you to think he’s cool.” She must have sensed Zuko’s scowl because she laughed. “Yeah, I think tomorrow morning. Go easy on him and he’ll have the twinkle back in his toes in no time.”

“Okay. Well—thanks for filling me in, I guess. I better get some work done before he comes back and takes up all of my time.” Zuko stood up, adjusting his robes.

“Wait! You never told me if I can merge the metalbending academy with the future police force!” 

Her eyes were wide and earnest. She was clearly passionate about this.

“Of course, Toph. I think it sounds like a great idea. I trust you to run the department as you see fit, and I know Aang agrees.”

She beamed at him.

The rest of the day passed all too quickly, with Zuko sending letters to different contractors to put businesses in the city’s downtown area. They had a small aviary of messenger hawks in rotation, and by the time the last was sent, he was exhausted. He could delegate the job to a lower staff member, but he felt that it was important to change the reputation of the Fire Lord by building the city with his own two hands, so to speak. 

He slept through his alarm the next morning and was only woken when a massive earthquake shook him sideways off the bed. His first, half-awake thought was that the city was being attacked by earth benders who viewed the Republic of Nations as an affront to the Earth Kingdom. It had happened once a few months ago, but between Zuko, Aang, and Toph, it ended as quickly as it began. 

He sprang to his feet and poked his fingers through the window blinds. The barren landscape was completely obscured by a furry white mass less than ten yards away from Zuko’s bungalow. The ground shook a second time as Appa let out a lazy growl.

Zuko stepped away from the window and pulled his robe on sloppily, not particularly caring if Aang and Sokka saw him disheveled. He didn't bother with the top knot, leaving his hair hanging to his shoulders. 

It was blazingly bright out, the sun high in the sky. Sokka was emptying a bag of melons in front of Appa, who snorted appreciatively before he started munching. Sokka had grown taller and stronger in the past few years and was starting to resemble Hakoda, though he wasn’t nearly as broad-shouldered. Even Aang had hit a growth spurt and was now as tall as Zuko. Zuko suspected he’d soon be the shortest of the three of them, much to his dismay. 

The lanky boy in question appeared on the other side of Appa with Momo on his shoulder. Aang impassively watched Appa smash a melon between his teeth as he leaned against his air glider staff.

Sokka glanced in the direction of the bungalow, squinting. “Zuko!” he shouted, waving his arm. “Over here!” As if Zuko wasn’t already headed towards them.

Aang looked up. “Oh, hey, Zuko.” Momo shrieked and released his clutches, flying onto Appa’s back. 

“Hey, Aang,” Zuko said softly.

Aang held his gaze for a few seconds, then smiled sheepishly. “You know.”

Zuko blushed and shook his head. “No. I mean—what?”

Aang laughed humorlessly. “How did you find out?”

Zuko shrugged. “Toph.”

“Oh.” Aang sighed, looking down. He twirled his staff, making a divot in the earth at their feet. “I’m really fine. I know I look all—sad, or whatever. But I’m really fine.”

Zuko looked at Sokka, who was helping himself to one of Appa’s melons, his cheeks bulging. “He’s fine, dude,” Sokka said after swallowing. “Come on, let’s have some of that weird tea Iroh gave you for your coronation anniversary.”

An hour later, the three of them were seated in comfy plush chairs in Zuko’s living room, fires crackling in the torches that lined the walls. The tea had done a great job in raising Aang’s spirits. It wasn’t too strong, but it was comforting with a bit of a kick and had a nice warming effect.

Aang rambled for a bit about how a garment district would help the economy. Sokka was clearly not listening, but Zuko thought it was a pretty cool idea. After a few minutes, Aang stopped talking abruptly and stared down at his tea leaves. Zuko figured something had reminded him of Katara suddenly. He didn’t really know what to say.

“Anyway,” said Aang, snapping to attention, “we’re going to Ba Sing Se tonight.” He poured himself some more tea.

“To talk to the fabric merchants?”

“Huh? No. To go out. You know, out on the town.” He avoided Zuko’s eyes as he sipped his tea.

Zuko raised his eyebrows at Sokka, who nodded.

“So… Air Nomads are allowed to drink now?”

Aang shrugged. “I don’t want to drink. I just want to go out.”

After Zuko cleared the tea cups, Aang took over the bathroom, getting ready for their big night. Aang had his own place on a small island near the city, but Sokka was staying here with Zuko, and they were all operating with the unspoken knowledge that Aang shouldn't be alone. 

Sokka had somehow gotten a hold of some possum-chicken skewers on the way over and was now devouring them in the kitchen. He held one out to Zuko, who accepted it wordlessly.

“So what exactly are we doing in Ba Sing Se? Something… morally questionable, I imagine?” Zuko took a bite of his possum-chicken. A couple years ago, after one of his break-ups with Mai, Uncle Iroh had taken him to a strip club in the upper ring of Ba Sing Se. He had worn a mask so that no one would recognize him as the budding Fire Lord, and though it had been a very fun night, he felt a little creepy ogling women with his old uncle. The ladies knew Uncle well and acted like they were in love with him. Zuko hoped he had several decades before that sort of fake attraction appealed to him.

Sokka paused, setting the greasy skewer down on Zuko’s pristine countertop. “I want Aang to feel better. I really do. But dude, he broke up with my sister yesterday. I know he thinks talking to some girls will help him get over her, but I just want to make sure he doesn’t do anything that would be disrespectful to Katara.”

Zuko snorted. “Like what?”

“Like hooking up with someone the day after they broke up!”

“There’s no way Aang is going to ‘hook up’ with someone. It’s Aang. He loves Katara. And he’s the most innocent, respectful kid I’ve ever met.”

Sokka shook his head, picking up the skewer. “Doesn’t matter. Any guy who’s single for the first time in years is going to try it. It’s just how we are.”

“Uhh.” Zuko took another bite of his skewer, considering his words. “Are you sure you’re not just saying that because you haven’t been single in years?”

Sokka rolled his eyes. “Obviously! That’s how I know what I’m talking about. I love Suki to death, but if we broke up I would definitely not wait to hook up with someone.”

“That’s extremely hypocritical!”

“You don’t get it. You always break up with Mai, so you’ve had your fun.”

“Yeah, which is how I know it’s not disrespectful. And therefore wouldn’t be if Aang hooked up with someone.”

Sokka waved his skewer in Zuko’s face wildly. “Sister! The ex-boyfriend of my sister! No! I don’t care if it’s hypocritical. If he tries to get with anyone I will personally kick him in his nether arrow!”

Zuko scowled and pushed Sokka’s arm down. “Fine! I’ll try to keep him away from girls, too. Just to prevent you from making an ass out of yourself.” 

“Thaaank you,” said Sokka sarcastically. He snatched Zuko’s half-eaten skewer out of his hand and ran into the guest room, shutting the door behind him.

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. They may not have had roads or real buildings yet, but already the circus had come to the city.

 

**********************

“This was a bad idea. Appa has bad memories of Ba Sing Se!” Aang yelled over Appa’s frantic roar.

“Who here doesn’t have bad memories of Ba Sing Se?! Momo will keep you company, okay buddy?” Sokka said, patting Appa’s nose. 

Momo trilled in agreement. Appa collapsed in a heap on the ground, throwing his front hooves over his eyes.

“That works,” Sokka said. “Come on, Aang.”

The three of them started walking towards the nightlife district of the upper ring.

Aang didn’t want to desecrate his monk clothing by wearing it to nightclubs, so he was dressed in some of Zuko’s. Though they were the same height, they had very different body types, but with some artful pinning and draping, he actually looked pretty good. Zuko clapped him on the back proudly, his eyes watering when a cloud of cologne hit him in the face. 

“What is that smell?” he coughed. Aang opened his mouth to answer but Sokka beat him to it.

“Dragon Noir,” he said in an undeterminable accent. “The finest in men’s fragrances, sourced from the colonies. Want a spritz?”

“I’m good, thanks.”

“Is it too much?” Aang asked anxiously, casting another look in the direction of Appa and Momo.

“No, buddy, it’s fine.”

“Aang! Reeee-lax! You are going to have the time of your life tonight, my man. We’re going to the world famous Lotus Lounge.” Sokka smelled just as strongly as Aang and had lots of shiny product in his wolf tail hairstyle.

“Well, I’ve never heard of it,” Zuko said.

“Me either,” said Aang.

“Read a men’s magazine sometime, guys, okay?”

“I thought you only read those for the funnies,” Aang said.

“I read them because I”—Sokka held up a finger—“am a man of style and swagger. And yes, the funnies are extremely funny.”

Aang pulled his hood up as they made their way through town, not wanting the extra attention. Thousands of tiny paper lanterns lined the streets in clusters, bathing partygoers in a soft yellow light. Men in clothes like theirs walked hand in hand with beautifully dressed women. The moon hung low and full in the sky as if it didn’t want to miss out on the fun. 

“It’s this place here,” Sokka said suddenly. They were standing in front of a nondescript black facade with a heavy black door, on which “The Lotus Lounge” was printed in scrawling gold characters. He opened the door.

Entered a small foyer. An old and very rigid-backed man greeted them, holding a scroll in his hands.

“Names, gentlemen?”

“Oh, we’re not on the list,” Sokka said, smiling genially.

The man raised his eyebrows so high his monocle threatened to fall out. “I’m sorry, sirs, but you must be on the list to enter.” He rolled it up, tucking it into his robes. “May I suggest the Salt of the Earth nightclub?”

“No you may not, sir,” said Sokka. Zuko exchanged a look with Aang. “Sir, my friends and I haven’t the time to be put on some list. We are busy changing the world. See this scar?” He grabbed Zuko by the jaw, pushing his cheeks together. “This is his royal highness, Fire Lord Zuko. And see this?” He turned to Aang and pushed his hood down. “This is his universal bendiness, Avatar Aang.” He put his thumb to his chest. “And I am Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe.” He put his hands on his hips.

Zuko and Aang smacked their foreheads almost in unison. Well, thought Zuko, so much for their big night out. Or any night out ever again. He was pretty sure he’d have to go back into hiding.

“Great Scott!” The man bowed so low that this time his monocle actually did fall out, though he adjusted it quickly. “It’s an honor to meet you, your highness, and your… universal bendiness. Chief Sokka,”—Sokka raised his eyebrow at Zuko—“you are always welcome here. Follow me.”

He headed down a narrow hallway, and they followed.

“I can’t believe you did that, ‘Chief,’” Aang scoffed in a low voice.

“How did you even know it would work?” Zuko asked.

Sokka laughed sheepishly. “I didn’t really, I’ve just always wanted to try it! And I never get to, because you guys never want to go out with me!”

“I can’t imagine why,” Zuko said just loud enough for Aang to hear, who chuckled.

The old man led them to a large, circular room with a circular bar on the lowest level in the center. Circling that was a level that was slightly higher than the bar and an outer level that was slightly higher than the previous one. The place was full of chintz sofas and chandeliers, dotting the walls with prisms in the low light. 

Sokka started heading towards the bar, but the man gestured the other way. “Please, gentlemen, make yourselves comfortable and all your needs will be attended to.”

Sokka looked at Aang and shrugged, following the man to a group of love seats near the wall, on the highest level. Almost immediately after they sat down, a waiter arrived with a tray containing three glasses of amber liquor over ice and three cigars.

“Um,” Aang said, raising a finger. “Do you have anything non-alcoholic?”

“Certainly! I can bring you a Swirly Temple, if that’s agreeable to you, Avatar?”

“I’m not totally sure what that is, but I live in a temple…so, sure!”

Sokka had put the end of the cigar into his mouth, and Zuko followed suit. The waiter lit Sokka’s with a fancy matchbook. He turned to do the same for Zuko, but Zuko had already used firebending to light his, and the man bowed and hurried away.

Sokka sucked on the end of his cigar and retched. 

“You’re not supposed to inhale,” said Zuko. “Just puff.” He puffed on the end of his cigar a couple of times to demonstrate. 

“Huh? That’s like chewing up your food and then not swallowing. Cigars are stupid.” Sokka gave his an evil look and then puffed on it distastefully. 

A woman in a tight but elegant dress walked up and handed Aang a red fizzy drink with a cherry and a loopy straw. “Your Swirly Temple, Avatar,” she said reverently, bowing before walking away.

“Nice,” said Aang, admiring the straw.

Zuko took a sip from one of the drinks. It was barrel aged whiskey. Uncle Iroh had taught him the finer points of alcohol consumption, and this one went down smooth. Sokka grabbed a glass, took a sip, and gagged. Then he took another.

Aang had just taken a sip of his Swirly Temple. “Oh. My god. You guys. This is so good. You need to try this.”

“I think we’re good,” said Zuko, swirling his glass appreciatively. 

“Whoa,” Sokka muttered, looking over Zuko’s shoulder. Zuko turned to see what he was looking at. At a couple of sofas over lounged a group of gorgeously dressed young women. All five pairs of eyes were on them, and they smiled as they fanned themselves.

Zuko looked back at Sokka, and shrugged as if to say, ‘why not.’ Sokka smiled and waved the girls over. “Make room, Aang.”

A girl with shiny black curls styled in an elaborate pile atop her head sat came over and sat between Aang and Sokka. A short buxom girl with lots of gold jewelry sat on Zuko’s right, and her tall thin friend draped in a lacy gown sat down on Sokka’s other side. A sweet-faced girl in a jaunty hat sat on Aang’s other side, and a beautiful woman in a fur stole sat on Zuko’s left. They were surrounded. 

“Ladies, a pleasure. I’m Sokka. This is Aang and Zuko.”

“We know who you are,” said the tall woman in the same reverent almost-whisper the waitress used. Sokka shook her fragile hand. “I’m Lian.”

The other women introduced themselves. The girl with the shiny curls was Karin, the short girl was Dai-Tai, and the girl with the hat was Mariko. The woman in the stole told them her name was Meili and then turned to Zuko. 

“It is such an honor,” she said, in a low sexy voice. Zuko raised his eyebrows at Sokka, who hid his grin in his glass.

The waiter arrived. “A round of our finest champagne for the ladies?”

“Yes, my good man,” said Sokka. 

Five minutes later, the champagne had been poured—on the house, the waiter assured them—and Sokka was deep into his dramatic retelling of the Day of Black Sun.

“My father was too badly hurt to continue the fight, so at the age of fifteen, I had to lead the battalion past the castle’s defenses.”

“Wow,” came the chorus of feminine sighs. 

“That’s so brave. Were you scared?” Karin simpered.

“Pssssssh. No way. I knew we could take ‘em down Sokka style.” He made a gesture like he was about to throw a boomerang. “I mean, I kinda messed up at the end, but I got all the way up in there.”

“Why’d you mess up?” asked Mariko, peering around Aang and Karin. 

“Because… of love,” Sokka said, staring wistfully into the distance.

“Awwwww!” the girls all squealed.

“Fire Lord,” Meili said, placing her hand on Zuko’s shoulder. “Is there a Mrs. Fire Lord?”

Zuko laughed. “No. I’m a little young for that.”

“Pssh, don’t act like you and Mai won’t be married by the time you’re twenty-one. I know all about your royal responsibilities. Unlike me. I’m a lone wolf, baby.” Sokka smiled at Lian.

Zuko laughed. “Does Suki know that?”

“Suki doesn’t believe in the institution of marriage! I don’t think! We’ve never talked about it.”

“Well, unmarried means free game in my book,” said Meili, taking a prim sip of her champagne. Karin giggled and reached across to smack Meili’s knee admonishingly. 

Aang made a loud sound as he sucked the last of his Swirly Temple through the loopy straw. He put the glass on the coffee table, looking irritated. “Well, I’m single. No girlfriend. No ball and chain. Just livin’ the single life.” He put his hands behind his head and his feet up on the table, accidentally knocking over his glass.

“Aren’t you engaged to Sokka’s sister?” asked Mariko, her eyes wide.

Aang’s face turned red. “Nope.”

The girls all stared at him questioningly.

“She’s just a friend,” he added.

“Aww,” they sighed, eyes full of understanding and pity.

“Not like—just a friend, I mean like. You know. It was just, like, physical and we were definitely not engaged. We were dating, but like, I decided I wanted to be a free man. But it’s cool, we still—do it.” Aang whispered the last two words, noticing that Sokka was staring him down like prey. The girls looked at Aang like he’d sprouted an extra head.

“Nice,” said Mariko cheerfully, looking appraisingly at Aang.

Sokka continued talking about their adventures, making himself seem like the hero of every story while Aang fumed silently. It was humorous watching Sokka act so pompously, but Zuko knew this was the last thing Aang needed right now.

“Ladies, it’s been great meeting you, but we have some important world-saving business to attend to.” Zuko stood. Sokka raised his eyebrows at Zuko, who gave him a look. 

“How will we see you again?” asked Lian, clutching Sokka’s hand as he stood. 

“We’ll be back,” he said, kissing her hand.

As they stepped back into the night, Sokka rounded on Zuko. “What, you weren’t having fun?”

“Not really, and hello? This night is supposed to be for Aang. No one was even talking to him!”

Aang scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“You’re right, you’re right,” Sokka sighed. “Sorry Aang, I guess I’m just used to you being your charismatic, social self and me not having to worry about it. I should have known tonight would be different.”

“It’s okay, Sokka. All that Dragon Noir probably just got to your head,” said Aang, patting him on the shoulder.

“So, now what?” sighed Sokka.

“We’re going to a real party.” Zuko grinned mischievously. “Follow me, boys.”

After several minutes of walking, they arrived at a bar on the lower ring. Loud music and the sound of breaking glass could be heard from outside.

“What is this place?” asked Aang in awe.

“This is the divey-est dive in Ba Sing Se. My friend June used to come here all the time.”

“Your friend June? You mean the bounty hunter you sicked on us when I first met Aang?” asked Sokka incredulously.

“Yeah, and the one who helped me find Uncle, remember? She’s cool.” Zuko pushed open the door and the others followed. A bar fight had just been broken up, leaving a couple of broken chairs and glasses in its wake. The crowd was a mix of thugs and con men, and women who looked nothing like those they left at the Lotus Lounge but just as open to suggestion.

“Yes,” said Sokka, nodding. “Sokka likey. I’m headed to the bar, and no fancy-man can stop me!” He ran towards the man standing behind the counter, who was washing a mug and had a permanently skeptical face. “Two whiskeys on the rocks and a Swirly Temple!”

The bartender scowled. “What the hell,” he said in a gravelly whisper, “is a Swirly Temple?”

“A glass of water!” Aang shouted. “He means a glass of water.”

The bartender grunted and begin fixing their drinks.

“Sokka,” Aang whispered frantically, “do you want me to get my ass kicked?”

“Aang, I’ve seen you kick more asses at one time than this bar can contain per maximum occupancy restrictions.”

“That is not the point!”

“Once I saw June kick this whole bar’s ass,” Zuko chimed in.

“Oooooh, June,” said Sokka mockingly, rolling his eyes.

After slapping the bartender some extra yuans, they took their drinks to a table in the corner. Sokka finished his quickly and went back to the bar for another. While he was there, a pretty woman with long hair and a very revealing corset started talking to him, laughing so dramatically she showed all her crooked teeth. Another girl with a ponytail and extremely high heels joined them, and touching his arm and fluttering her eyelashes. 

“I’ve never met a man who needed so much female attention,” said Zuko distastefully, taking a sip of whiskey. Even Uncle Iroh had more restraint.

“Girls looove Sokka. Always have. Super attractive guys always have great luck with girls.” Aang shrugged.

“Aang, don’t compare yourself to him. You’ve been single for about five minutes; I’m sure you’ll have great luck with girls, too.”

Aang laughed. “I didn’t mean it like that! I’ve never been jealous of Sokka. I don’t blame girls for going crazy for him; he is really attractive.”

Zuko laughed, giving Aang a weird look.

“He is! I mean, he looks almost exactly like Katara.” Zuko laughed harder. “You find her attractive, right?” Aang gave Zuko a suggestive look.

Zuko was too buzzed not to find this hilarious, but he tried to answer seriously. “Well—here’s the thing. I guess I used to, when I was chasing you guys, and when I was trying to get her to accept me. But she did accept me, and for some reason, I haven’t been attracted to her in that way since.”

“Seriously?” Aang gasped.

Zuko laughed. “Yeah. Sorry if that’s rude to say.”

“Not attracted to Katara? Seems impossible. But you said it while drunk, so it must be true,” Aang mused, pulling on his bottom lip.

“Yup. Also, I would never say Sokka’s bad-looking, but between you and me I really don’t get why girls love him so much more than other guys.” They glanced over towards Sokka, who was now buying a round of shots for the two ladies and a third, equally enamored friend. Zuko didn't share Aang’s attitude: he was jealous.

“It’s not just his looks. He’s approachable and he actually likes the attention. Honestly, you’re better looking than Sokka. You know you’re good looking, right? But most girls probably wouldn’t flirt with you because you look like you’d be mean to them.”

Zuko felt his face heat up and hoped it was just the whiskey. He scowled. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Aang. Is this one of those things where you compliment me so I have to compliment you back? Sorry, but I’m not going to sit here and tell you how pretty you are.”

Aang laughed. “That’s okay, I’m well aware of it.” He smiled sweetly and rolled his eyes up and to the side in a girly fashion.

Zuko groaned but couldn’t help laughing, because it was so true. Aang was a good-looking kid, but he couldn’t really be called handsome. He was pretty.

Sokka walked up with the women. Up close, it was clear that they were much older than Sokka, Aang, and Zuko. “Are you boys ready for a round of pai sho?” said the long haired one. Sokka raised his eyebrows at Zuko and Aang.

“Well, I was trained by the best pai sho player in the Fire Nation, so that would be a little unfair. And my friend here doesn’t gamble,” said Zuko, clapping Aang’s shoulder. 

“The hell I don’t! I was trained by the best pai sho player in the Southern Air Temple. Let’s do it!” Aang said, jumping to his feet. The girls cheered and led them to the gaming tables on the other side of the room.

“What has gotten into you?” said Zuko admiringly. 

“I don’t know! It’s like—I’m not drunk, but being around you when you’re drunk is making me feel kinda—woooooo,” Aang said, spinning his finger around. “Like a placebo effect.”

“Hmm. You’re a cheap date, Aang.”

Zuko won the first round of pai sho easily. Feeling uncomfortable with the way the entire bar was side-eyeing him, he opted out of the next round to buy drinks for themselves and the ladies. Aang joined him to help carry them. Before they returned to the table, Sokka came running up to them. 

“Oh my god. You guys! We are on the moon. I repeat, we are ON THE MOON. And she. Is. Beautiful.” He dragged his hands down the sides of his face and gasped. 

“What is happening?” Zuko asked.

Sokka clapped his hand over his mouth. “Have I learned the language of the eel hounds? Finally! All my studying has paid off!” He dropped to the ground and begin taking his shoes off. 

“I think I know what this is. One sec,” said Aang, and then he strode over to the pai sho table. 

Sokka had his shirt off and was now working on the drawstring of his pants. Zuko quickly set the drinks down and got on the ground, grabbing Sokka’s hands.

“You can’t get naked here, man.”

“But I can’t go swimming in the sky fully clothed! Unhand me, eel hound!”

Sokka fought feebly against Zuko’s grip.

Aang came back, looking grave, followed by the woman with the ponytail. “Just as I thought. Sokka drank cactus juice.”

“Hey, it ain’t my fault the kid can’t handle his juice,” said the woman, taking one of the drinks Zuko set down.

“Okay, we’re getting out of here.” Zuko held Sokka up while Aang wrestled him back into his shirt.

“No! NO! I am not going to the spirit world, it’s not my time!” Sokka flailed, smacking Aang in the face. 

“Ow!” said Aang.

Zuko pulled Sokka’s arms behind him. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” said Aang, rubbing his jaw. “But I have no idea how we’re going to get Sokka back to Appa and then keep him from jumping off.”

“We could tie him up?” Zuko suggested.

Sokka gasped and started wiggling frantically in Zuko’s grip. “THE QUEEN IS HERE!” he screamed. “She’s here and she summons me!”

“Yeah, I’ll ask the bartender if he has any rope,” said Aang, turning.

“You’re seriously going to tie up my boyfriend?” came an amused female voice behind them.

Zuko turned to see Suki standing there in full Kiyoshi gear.

“My beautiful queen!” Sokka sobbed.

“How’d you find us?” Zuko asked.

“You really think I don’t know where you are at all times, Fire Lord? You literally pay me to make sure you don’t get assassinated. I’ve been following you all night. I see you three were quite popular at the Lotus Lounge.”

“I mean, I was, but not Sokka,” said Aang.

Sokka gasped. “How does this turtle-duck know my name?”

“You can let go of him, Zuko. He’ll do whatever I tell him.”

“I don’t know, Suki. He is on a lot of cactus juice.”

“Yeah, we drink it together sometimes. C’mon, Captain Boomerang. This queen needs to be serviced.”

Zuko’s jaw dropped. He released Sokka’s arms and he went into Suki’s as docile as a kitten, rubbing his face on hers and smearing her makeup.

“Whoa, sweetheart, save it for the inn. Thanks for looking out for him, guys. We’ll meet up later, okay?”

“No, thank _you_ ” said Zuko, and Suki dragged Sokka out of the bar. It weirded him out to learn that she followed him around, but currently, it had its benefits.

“I need a drink,” he said, picking up one of the ones he set down. He gulped it down, then grabbed another and did the same. 

Aang laughed and snatched the drink away while Zuko was in mid-sip, causing some whiskey to dribble on his chin. “Are you trying to get me drunk?!”

“Yes, Aang! Drink it!” He pushed Aang’s hand with the glass in it towards his mouth. “Come on, you’re thirsty.”

Aang sniffed the glass and gagged. “No way.”

“It’s not fun drinking alone!”

“Then stop drinking, maybe?”

Zuko crossed his arms and sat sullenly on a bench. “You have some pretty good ideas, Aang,” he said reproachfully.

“I know, right?” He leaned his elbow onto the high table nearby, smirking.

Zuko glanced around the bar. It was starting to wind down, pockets of regulars here and there, a few people passed out in their booths. “So… was this the ‘big night out’ of your dreams?”

Aang smiled. “It was actually pretty cool. I discovered a new drink, I got to see Sokka high again, and I got to hang out with my best friends. To be honest, though, it’s a little counter-productive having Sokka around when I’m trying to forget about Katara.”

“Yeah,” said Zuko. Then, because alcohol had removed his filter, he added “Sokka didn’t want you to hook up with any girls. I think that’s why he was trying to talk to all of them.”

“Are you serious?” Aang laughed. “What’s he going to do, take a leaf from Suki’s book and follow me around forever?”

“So you actually would hook up with a girl?”

Aang shrugged. “Why not? I’m single. Besides Katara’s the only person I’ve ever kissed, let alone done—other stuff with. If we get back together, and she’s done stuff with other people and I haven’t, it’ll mess everything up.” He dragged his hands over his bald head, sitting next to Zuko on the bench.

“Well—only if she tells you about it.” Zuko and Mai had been each other’s firsts, but what they got up to during their several breakups was strictly “don’t ask, don’t tell.” He’d only met one of her other boyfriends, Kei Lo, and she dumped him for Zuko, so he didn’t feel too sexually inadequate.

“Nah, I’d need to know. Especially if I hadn’t. So I should.”

“Well—don’t force yourself. But, uh, Sokka’s not here now, so you can score with one of these… lovely bar wenches.”

Aang glanced around. “They seem sweet, but I don’t think it’s going to happen tonight. You can be my wingman some other time.” He patted Zuko’s arm.

“I look forward to it.”

“Ready to get out of here?”

“Sure, but where would we go? Appa is so far and I’m so drunk.”

“We should just get a room. Did Suki say where they were staying?” Aang asked.

“I don’t think so. Also, they’re probably into some weird sex stuff and I don’t want to overhear Sokka’s cactus juice ramblings combined with dirty talk.”

“Oh, yeah, that would be bad. Well, there are tons of inns around here. Let’s just find one that doesn’t look too murdery and hope it’s not theirs.”

They set out into the moonlit street, strolling past last-call revelers. The air was warm; summer had just arrived. 

“Your birthday is soon,” Aang said.

“Yeah, next month. Twenty.” He scoffed. 

“What’s wrong with being twenty?”

Zuko grumbled. “Well, it’s not, like, a rule, but most of the Fire Lords were either married by the time they took the crown or betrothed shortly after. Since I wasn’t even seventeen yet when I took over, it didn’t matter then, but lately, it seems like the whole nation is subtly pressuring me to marry someone.”

“Why do they care if the Fire Lord is married?”

“It’s more trustworthy; puts the subjects’ minds at ease. Also, depending on the marriage, it can change political power. And—to be personal—the court is suggesting that if I marry Mai, her father will lose a lot of pull as he keeps trying to recruit people to overthrow me.”

Aang let out a low whistle. “So romantic.”

“Ha. Yeah. And there’s also another little problem. Mai and I haven’t talked about any of this. So, like, what if she also expects me to marry her?” Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Zuko, I’m sure that if Mai wants to marry you, it’s not so she can be Fire Lady. It’s because you guys love each other. You always have and always will.”

“I know. I know, I’ll always love her. But, like—what if she isn’t the one I want to spend the rest of my life with? What if that person’s still out there?” He didn’t often allow himself to think it, because it felt like a betrayal.

“Well, if you feel that way, you should be honest. Like Katara and I. We had to break up so that one day we can know for sure, one way or another.”

“Yeah, well, we’ve tried that. No, it’s stupid. I’m going to marry her someday anyway, so I should just do it now before she gets mad and leaves me.”

“Now that’s stupid,” said Aang. They came across a three-story inn that looked cozy and with only a slight risk of murder. “Let’s check this out.”

The inn had several vacancies and was able to offer them a spacious room on the top floor with a stove and lots of nice lighting. There was a large, comfortable bed, and a cot which the innkeeper pulled out of the closet and set up.

“I’ll take the cot,” said Aang when the innkeeper left. “As a monk, I enjoy the simpler things in life.”

“I’m not tired!” said Zuko, flopping down onto his bed. It was so comfortable. In that moment, Zuko was glad Aang was a monk.

“Good, because if you go to bed now, you’ll have a wicked hangover.” Aang reached into the pocket of the too-big pants he was wearing and pulled out a teabag. “Your uncle gave this to me. I figured I’d have to use it on Sokka, but Suki will take care of him. It’s Iroh’s own special sobering blend; he says he hasn’t had a hangover in fifteen years.”

“Yeah, yeah, we’ve all heard that lie.”

“Worth a try,” said Aang, and he got to work putting a kettle on, lighting the stove with firebending. He found a dusty mug in the cupboard and waterbent it clean, then airbent it dry, setting it next to the stove.

“You’re taking care of me like Suki takes care of Sokka. That makes you a girl.”

“I dare you to make a comment like that in front of Suki.”

“Never.”

“So, any plans for your birthday?”

“Um. Get you laid?”

“Thanks, but we should probably do something for you.”

“Get me laid.”

Aang laughed. “If that only happens on your birthday, I kind of get why you don’t want to marry Mai.”

“No, just kidding. Hey, did you know that Azula and I were both born during summer so we would be more powerful? And that’s why we’re so—” Zuko hiccuped “—powerful?”

“Really?” Aang said. “Your parents planned it that way?”

“Oh, yes. Yes, actually, this is kind of fucked up. So, firebenders are more powerful in summer, because the sun is out more. Obviously. But what you probably don’t realize is that that doesn’t just extend to their bending. Passion and life are the tenants of firebending—remember when we learned that from the dragons? That was cool—and so firebenders are way more sexually turned on and much more likely to conceive during summer. Like, in heat. Ha. That’s why a lot of them are born in spring.”

Aang looked thoughtful. “Firebenders in heat. Makes sense, I guess.”

“Right, but here’s the fucked up part. My dad felt no passion for my mother, and since my mother was not a fire bender, she could conceive whenever. So my dad specifically only tried to conceive us during fall, to test his theory that being born in summer made stronger benders. But yeah, he wouldn’t sleep with her at any other time. Not that she even wanted to.”

Aang’s mouth hung open. “How do you know all this?”

Zuko shook his head. “Reconnecting with my mother has led to some pretty weird revelations.”

“Yeah… wow. Well, that does explain why you two are so powerful. So, like…” Aang smiled sheepishly. “Are you in firebender heat right now? Because you showed an awful lot of restraint at the Lotus Lounge.”

“Oh, no, I don’t really do that. I’m, like, repressed.”

Aang burst out laughing. “What?”

“Just kidding. But, I don’t know, I’m not that sexually passionate. I’ve never gotten caught up in the moment where I couldn’t control myself. In that sense.”

“Maybe that’s part of being more powerful,” Aang mused. The kettle began to whistle and Aang stood from where he was sitting on the cot. 

“Wait!” Zuko said, standing upright. “I’ll pour it! You don’t need to take care of me!”

He put the tea satchel in the cup and poured the hot water over it, then begin to blow on it.

Aang scratched the back of his head. “I don’t want to be _that_ guy, but an airbender could do the same thing way better.”

“I can do it just fine.” Zuko huffed and puffed.

A minute later, he was feeling lightheaded.

“For god’s sake,” said Aang, and he stood up and blew into Zuko’s cup. Part of the gust caught him in the face, but steam was no longer rising off the cup. 

Zuko took a sip and then spit the nasty-tasting liquid back into the cup. “Nope. Nope nope nope.”

“Drink it!”

“No. I’ve got a better idea.” Zuko set the cup next to the stove. “You know how we were talking about the dragons a few minutes ago? Or, like—I think I was talking about the dragons? Remember the Dancing Dragon? Still remember how to do it?”

“I mean—maybe? I’m a pretty good dancer, so. I probably have the muscle memory of it.”

Zuko grabbed Aang by his wiry biceps. “Aang, do the Dancing Dragon with me.” Aang raised an eyebrow. “Please, I beg you.”

“You need to drink that tea or you’ll be sorry in the morning. And we have no room to do the Dancing Dragon in here!”

“Yes, we do, Aang. Look.” Zuko pushed his bed all the way to the corner of the room and dragged Aang’s cot back into the closet. “So much room!” It still probably wasn’t enough. 

“Zuko,” said Aang crossing his arms. 

“No, Aang, it starts like this.” He uncrossed Aang’s arms and held them up with a bend in the elbow, lifting his right foot and bringing his knee up. “You have to lift your foot up, Aang.”

He looked between Aang’s outstretched arms and into his face, which was unamused. Zuko dropped Aang’s arms. “Fine, I’ll drink the stupid tea.”

“Thank you,” said Aang, handing him the cup. Zuko took another sip, made a face at the taste, and then gulped it down quickly. Right away, the drunkenness that made his head swim cleared up, and he was left with a slight buzz. 

“Huh. This stuff actually works.”

“Told you.”

“Oh man, I was so drunk.”

Aang patted him on the arm. “You really were.”

Zuko sighed. “Hey, Aang?”

“Yeah?”

“Now that I drank the sobriety tea, will you do the damn Dancing Dragon with me?”

Aang rolled his eyes, but he was smiling. “Sure.”

“Finally!” 

Zuko and Aang stood across from one another. Aang looked into Zuko’s eyes questioningly. Zuko gave a short nod, and they both sprang into the first step of the Dancing Dragon.

Though the dance normally involved continuously moving forward, there wasn't enough space in the room, so they went through the poses in place, glancing sideways at each other. During the seventh pose, Aang stopped him.

“You’re doing that one wrong.”

“What?” Zuko’s arms were stretched wide, palms out. His right knee was bent and his left leg was straight. “I thought you said you didn’t really remember.”

“It’s all coming back to me. It’s supposed to be like this.” Aang was in the same position, except his left leg was bent too, creating a deep squat.

“I don’t remember going low like that.”

“Try it, it feels right.”

Zuko bent his knee a bit. “Like that?” he said skeptically.

“No.” Aang righted himself and walked over so he was standing right in front of Zuko. “Go lower,” he said, pushing down gently on Zuko’s left hip. Zuko brought his hip as low as possible, creating a deep lunge. “But don’t sink into it!” Aang put his other hand on Zuko’s right ribcage, pushing him upwards. Their faces were almost touching.

“This feels—” Zuko trailed off. He was going to say ‘This feels wrong,’ meaning the pose didn’t feel like the one they learned three years ago. But with Aang so close to him, those words might be taken the wrong way. In fact, Aang was really close. Zuko could feel his breath on his neck.

“Feels what?” said Aang in a near-whisper.

Zuko looked up at Aang’s gray eyes, which were glinting in the light. The damn kid had the biggest eyes he’d ever—

Aang closed his eyes and pressed his lips to Zuko’s, and something happened. A feeling shot through Zuko’s heart like the first time he redirected lightning, terrifying in its ferocity. He grabbed Aang toward him, and they both stood upright as Aang’s soft, pretty lips parted for Zuko’s tongue. 

This is crazy, Zuko thought. He pulled away slightly to search Aang’s face. Aang’s lips were fat and swollen, his pupils blown wide and eyes heavy lidded. Zuko grabbed Aang by the jaw to pull Aang’s mouth to his. Aang moaned into Zuko’s mouth when he accidentally pressed on the spot Sokka had hit him in earlier.

“Sorry,” said Zuko, loosening his grip.

“So good,” breathed Aang, putting his hand over Zuko’s to make him grip his jaw tighter again, and that was all the encouragement he needed. He pushed Aang backward several steps, still lip locked, until his back was against the wall, and then pulled his own tunic over Aang’s head. The pants Aang wore were thin, and the impressive bulge of his hard dick made Zuko’s throb. He rubbed Aang over his pants, and Aang moaned loudly, grabbing Zuko’s shoulders. It was such a raw, vulnerable sound that it scared Zuko a little.

He wrapped his arms around Aang, standing close so that his right leg was between Aang’s and Aang’s right leg was between his and kissed his lips, then each of his cheeks. 

“Aang.” It came out in a cracked whisper, and he had to clear his throat. “Hey,” he said in a normal whisper. “This is…” he exhaled heavily. “Really, really nice, but are you sure? I mean, you’re not just doing this because you feel like you have to hook up with someone now, right?”

Aang rolled his eyes, but he was grinning widely, his eyes crinkled. “No way. Look. My hands are shaking.” He lifted one up for Zuko to see.

“So you want to stop?”

“No, no, I mean, my hands are shaking because I’m so fucking excited,” Aang said, his voice shaking slightly too. “I—” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I’ve wanted you for so long. That’s why I let you prove you were on my side three years ago, because I just wanted you to spend every day with me, teaching me. I wanted to believe anything you said.”

“Holy shit,” said Zuko, sliding his erection on Aang’s thigh. Zuko thought back to the first time he realized he might have feelings for Aang that didn’t line up with a normal friendship, and how those feelings started long before the realization. Aang had been so young, way too young. Since then, he’d been repressing those feelings for years, because it would have been wrong, so fucking wrong—he hissed as Aang adjusted his hips so that their hard cocks rubbed together, separated by two layers of clothing. 

Aang whispered into his scarred ear. “Tell me, Sifu Hotman, did you ever chase anyone else to the ends of the earth? You said it was your destiny to find me. You caught me years ago, but now you need to come and _get_ me.”

Zuko snarled and ripped open Aang’s pants, revealing a surprisingly nice pair of silk briefs that fit him well. Zuko rubbed his hands appreciatively over the smooth material, feeling the hardness of his dick and the muscles of his ass. He had never wanted someone this badly. I’m in heat, he thought, gripped with a mad desire to laugh that passed quickly when Aang sucked on his neck, sinking his teeth lightly into the skin.

Aang reached up and pulled the pin from Zuko’s topknot, releasing the golden cuff. Zuko’s hair fell down past his shoulders. Aang made a frustrated sound. “You look so good,” he sighed. He pulled Zuko’s shirt off, making a pained expression at the sight of his naked torso. 

Zuko smiled crookedly. “You’ve seen me shirtless before.”

“I _know_.” Aang ran his hands across Zuko’s hard chest, fingers grazing his lightning-made scar. Zuko wrapped his own hands around Aang’s back, and when he touched the similar scar there he was overwhelmed with an indescribable emotion that had been building within him since they set foot in Ba Sing Se. Perhaps sensing this, Aang kissed him deeply as he shoved Zuko’s pants down. Zuko kicked his pants away, and they stood there panting in their underwear. 

Aang spread his hand out on Zuko’s stomach. “When we met you thought you wanted to kill me. Show me what you really wanted instead.” He trailed his hand down to Zuko’s bulge.

“Fuck,” Zuko exclaimed softly. He couldn’t believe his innocent, sweet friend had such a dirty mind. Aang really thought Zuko wanted to fuck him when he was twelve and Zuko was sixteen? Zuko had been pursuing him for three years before he even saw the kid. At that point, he didn’t know the first thing about sex or attraction. And yet, what Aang was saying right now seemed to fit, in a sense. He had asked Aang to kill him once too—but maybe this was what he’d wanted all along.

He pulled Aang’s hand away from his crotch and pinned it to the wall over his head. Aang looked into Zuko’s eyes until he realized Zuko was pulling his own boxers off. The look on Aang’s face when Zuko’s cock sprung free felt as empowering as a comet. Aang swallowed, as if his mouth suddenly became too wet, and met Zuko’s eyes with total supplication. Zuko dropped Aang’s wrist and kissed his hairless chest. His recent growth spurt gave him a lot of room to fill out in the future, but right now he was perfect like this, thin but so strong. Zuko pressed the flatness of his tongue against Aang’s nipple, then pointed it, swirling it around the hard nub, eliciting another moan from Aang. 

He ran his hands down Aang’s ribcage as he kissed down the length of his abs to his bony hips that stuck out above his briefs, running his tongue across the faint V between them. Aang’s breath grew ragged. Finally Zuko slid the silk briefs down Aang’s thighs. The cock that bobbed right in front of Zuko’s face was bigger than it felt through the silk, and was more aesthetically perfect than he imagined a cock could be. He grasped it firmly, noticing as he did the blue tattoo running in a vertical line across Aang’s balls and up the underside of his dick. Zuko briefly wondered if Sokka knew how right he was that morning when he mentioned Aang’s ‘nether arrow,’ and then Aang’s dick was in his mouth and Aang’s hands were in his hair and all thoughts of Sokka were driven from Zuko’s mind. 

Aang cried out as Zuko deep throated him, running his finger down the blue line on his balls. He reached his other hand around to knead Aang’s perfect, smooth ass cheek. It fit so well in his hand. He brought his other hand from Aang’s balls and made a ring with his fingers around the base of his dick, slowly licking the arrow-adorned underside while locking eyes with Aang. As Zuko ran his fingers down the cleft of Aang’s ass, Aang spread his feet more widely apart, gritting his teeth and glaring down at Zuko with squinted eyes.

Zuko smirked as he lapped at the Aang’s cockhead, tasting a light trace of what had to be precome. He brought his hand from Aang’s ass and put his index and middle finger in his mouth, getting them slick with his saliva as Aang’s eyes grew wide. He reached up behind Aang’s balls and pressed his middle finger against Aang’s opening. 

Aang grunted and moved his feet even wider apart as Zuko circled his asshole with his finger. He slowly slid Aang’s cock into his mouth, and when it was fully lodged in the back of his throat, Zuko pushed the tip of his finger inside Aang.

“Oh god,” Aang panted, pulling Zuko’s hair so hard it was almost painful. “I’m gonna— I think—“

Aang’s dick fell out of Zuko’s mouth with a loud wet plop. “Not yet.” Zuko stood up slowly, the tip of his finger still in Aang’s impossibly tight ass. “Put your arms around my shoulders and your legs around my waist.”

Aang’s mouth hung slightly ajar as he complied. He put his arms around Zuko’s shoulders, and then bend the air beneath him to support his weight as he wrapped his legs around Zuko’s waist. Sliding his finger in a millimeter deeper, Zuko put his other hand under Aang’s ass.

Suddenly, Aang tightened his grip on Zuko’s shoulders, and the air beneath him disappeared. As Zuko’s hand was the now the only thing supporting Aang, gravity worked quickly, and Zuko’s finger slid in past the knuckle before he could stop it. Aang let out a yell against Zuko’s collarbone that sounded like pain and pleasure combined as Zuko adjusted his grip, accidentally driving his finger in even deeper.

Aang lifted his face to meet Zuko’s eyes, panting heavily. “Oops,” he intoned.

“God, you are so bad,” Zuko marveled. He carried Aang to the bed and threw him down, his finger disconnecting from Aang’s ass as Aang hit the mattress. Aang’s painfully hard dick was pointed up towards his belly button, leaving a dab of precome in the light hairs there and showing the full extent of the Air Nomads’ tattoo artistry. How lucky would he be, Zuko thought, if he could commission a painting of this exact view? He bit his lower lip in appreciation, then turned and went into the small private bathroom. A paper-wrapped bar of soap was in a dish by the wash basin. Next to it were a few other basic toiletries, and a cup. Zuko filled the cup with warm water, unwrapping the soap and dropping it in. He brought the cup and a small towel with him back into the room. 

Aang was laying in almost the same position Zuko left him in, but his arms were stretched high over his head with his hands interlocked, and his knees were bent with his feet flat against the mattress, showing Zuko everything. He gave Zuko an innocent, pouty look, but there was a mischievous gleam in his eye.

Zuko set the cup and towel down on the windowsill and gouged out a small piece of the water-softened soap. He hovered over Aang and kissed him deeply as he rubbed it between his fingers. “Has anyone ever been here?” he murmured as he slid his index finger into Aang slowly.

Aang gasped and arched, clutching Zuko’s biceps. “No.”

“Nothing?”

“Just my…fingers, but nothing bigger,” he panted, blushing.

Zuko flushed at the idea of Aang exploring himself with his fingers. “Then we have some work to do.” There was a book about sex in the royal library, with a very detailed section on anal pleasure. Zuko had read it thoroughly, wondering if it was something Mai might want, but didn’t have the nerve to try. Mai usually took control in their sex life, and he figured if she really wanted it she’d have already demanded he try it.

He slowly worked his middle finger in alongside his index, the two slipping together as Aang’s body tensed up around them. 

“Just relax,” Zuko said. He wrapped his free hand around Aang’s throat and squeezed the sides lightly, causing his eyes to lose focus as Zuko begin to fuck him with two fingers. He released the pressure but kept his hand around Aang’s throat, and Aang’s eyes refocused on Zuko’s as Zuko found a steady rhythm with his fingers. He wanted to try bending some heat into his fingertips but didn’t trust himself not to lose control, not with Aang so wanting and brazen beneath him, a flush spreading through his body.

While his right hand worked Aang’s hole open, he spread his left palm out on Aang’s perfect chest. He wasn’t just pretty, he was fucking beautiful. Zuko moaned and dropped onto Aang, rubbing their hard dicks together and stroking the arrow on top of his head as Aang stared into his eyes in open-mouthed awe. Finally, Zuko’s fingers found the sweet spot he had only read about, and Aang let out a guttural moan, squeezing his eyes shut and arching his hips up to Zuko’s, making Zuko see stars as Aang clenched around him. 

“Unnngh,” Aang grunted through gritted teeth. “I’ve been holding myself back with water bending but I don’t think I can do it anymore! Please, Zuko!”

“I want you to come for me, Aang,” said Zuko, and he gripped their dicks together in his large hand, jerking them furiously as he rubbed Aang deep inside. He watched Aang’s face as he threw his head back and let out a half scream, half cry. His hands tangled in Zuko’s hair and pulled hard as his seed spilled over Zuko’s hand and both of their dicks, and his asshole spasmed around Zuko’s fingers, clutching so hard that he could no longer rub. Zuko was glad he had been drunk earlier; in any other state he probably couldn’t have held back his own release.

“You’re doing so good. Pretty boy,” he whispered, smirking as he kissed Aang’s cheeks, forehead, and finally lips, which were slightly parted. “I’m going to give you something you need, okay? Because you’re so good.”

“Yes. Please, Sifu Hotman,” Aang panted. Zuko lifted his come-drenched left hand. 

“Clean me off first?”

He meant with waterbending, but Aang grabbed Zuko’s hand and begin licking his own semen off of it, running his tongue up Zuko’s long fingers and back down to suck on the webbing in between. Zuko gasped at how good it felt and how powerful it made him feel to watch Aang suckle on his fingers submissively while Zuko stood over him. With Mai, he was always the submissive one, and he thought he preferred that. But now, his dick was harder than ever.

Zuko gently pulled his hand from Aang’s grip, trailing his finger down Aang’s bottom lip like he was swearing him to secrecy. “Thank you.” He slowly extracted his fingers from Aang’s ass, and returned them to the cup, breaking off a larger piece of soap.

The water had made it much softer and messier, and as he slathered it onto Aang’s asshole, it dripped onto the bedspread. Zuko reinserted his two fingers, which slid in easily, and stroked Aang’s head as he kissed him. Then he spread his fingers as far as he could in a V shape, stretching that impossible tightness before adding his thumb.

Aang yelled. 

“Does it hurt? Do you want me to stop?”

Aang panted. “Zuko, it’s me. I can take it! Come on, just, please give it to me. Not your fingers—please.” He pulled Zuko down into a liplock.

Zuko removed his fingers from Aang as he broke the kiss, getting more soap from the cup. He slicked the length of his cock as Aang watched with heavy-lidded eyes.

“It’s so big,” Aang said.

“Too big?” That’s what Mai said, once.

“No.” Aang begin touching himself in imitation of Zuko. Properly lubricated, Zuko placed his hand on Aang’s shoulder and lined his dick up. Aang released his own, wrapping his arms and legs around Zuko.

As his cockhead breached the tight ring, Zuko checked Aang’s face for hesitation. His eyelids fluttered, and there was a slight smile on his lips. Zuko pushed in a couple of inches, and Aang hissed in obvious pain. 

“You okay?”

“It feels really intense.”

“Want me to just stay here for a minute?”

“No, keep going.”

The soapwater seemed to have developed a thicker consistency, and Zuko wondered if Aang did that with waterbending. He pushed in until Aang was seated halfway on his dick, pausing to kiss Aang’s neck and the bruised underside of his jaw. When he searched Aang’s eyes, they seemed to be asking him for something. He pushed the rest of the way in and watched as Aang’s eyelids pinched shut, his brows knitting together and mouth opening in a silent scream as Zuko’s balls came to rest against his asscheeks.

Zuko wrapped both his arms around Aang and kissed him. When he pulled away, Aang’s eyes were glazed; he looked light-headed. A slight smile somewhere between smugness and awe parted his lips, and he reached up to stroke Zuko’s cheek, his fingertips caressing the scar. He was fully hard again, his dick pressed against Zuko’s stomach muscles.

Zuko had never experienced anything like this. His casual sexual encounters were playful but perfunctory, and Mai directed their lovemaking like it was a sex scene in an Ember Island play. Even when they lost their virginity to each other, she had taken charge, making him lay on the bed so she could lower herself down, telling him not to move while she adjusted to the size of him. He loved being dominated by her and yielding to her control, but having Aang surrender to him was intoxicating. Aang, the Avatar, his best friend, arguably the most powerful person he knew, made weak beneath him.

Aang tilted his chin up, giving Zuko a pleading look. Zuko begin to thrust into that tight, velvety heat. Every nerve ending was on fire; he felt the part of his chest that wasn’t scarred flush. He started slow, working his way to a quicker pace as Aang’s moans grew more exuberant. It didn’t take long until he was able to slam in hard, his balls slapping Aang’s ass. Aang screamed out, arching his back. Zuko grabbed Aang by each wrists and pinned his hands over his head to the bed. Holding Aang’s wrists together with his left hand, he ran his right over Aang’s chest and then down the ridges of his abs until he got to his dick, surprised to find it half-hard and soaking wet. Zuko was planning to hold off longer, wanting to see what Aang looked like taking dick from behind, but the realization that Aang came from Zuko’s dick in his ass alone after already coming set Zuko off, and he gripped Aang’s right hip hard as he unloaded, a growl tearing through his gritted teeth. There was blazing white behind his eyelids and his ears filled with a dull buzz, as if what he was feeling in his dick was so intense that it short-circuited his other senses. Aang’s hand tangled in his hair as he arched up to capture Zuko’s lips in a kiss, and Zuko melted into it gratefully.

They kissed slowly as Zuko’s world solidified around him. He slowly slid his dick out of Aang, feeling his come spill out of Aang’s opened hole, and flopped to Aang’s side. Aang put his arms around Zuko, smiling like he just couldn’t help himself.

“Now I know why they call you Hotman,” he sighed dreamily. 

Zuko grinned. “You’re the only one who calls me that.”

“Now I know why I call you Hotman.”

“I think you always knew.”

“Hmm. Yeah.” Aang was still smiling slightly, his eyes closed. 

“I know you prefer the monk cot, but you should sleep here tonight.”

Aang laughed. “Of course.”

After letting him clean himself out with waterbending, Zuko pulled Aang with him to the top of the bed, where there was a single fluffy pillow. He laid his head on it and turned to the side, motioning for Aang to join him. Aang faced away from him and settled his ass by Zuko’s crotch, almost making him hard again. Zuko admired the way Aang’s blue stripe went all the way to the cleft of his perfect ass, and the way the spiky pattern left by Azula’s lightning strike all those years ago bisected his toned back muscles. He pressed the scar on his chest to the one on Aang’s back and wrapped his arm tightly around him. Aang grabbed Zuko’s hand and held it to his chest, where he could feel Aang’s heartbeat. Chi, he thought, and he pressed his lips to the vertebrae at the back of Aang’s neck. His lips went slack against the blue-inked skin as sleep quickly pulled him under, and he didn’t want the night to end, but with Aang so strong in his arms he gave himself permission to be heavy, and fell down, down.


	2. The Rift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aang's notoriously flighty even for an airbender. Zuko's left to deal with the fallout.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your patience! I've been working on a much longer chapter but decided to split it into two (long enough) chapters. I promise I won't wait eleven months to post the next one ;) It's almost done. Thank you so much to those who've commented or messaged me on tumblr; knowing that you guys were excited about this story made me that much more determined to work on it! <3

Consciousness returned to Zuko slowly from a deep, dreamless sleep. He stretched his arms out, becoming aware that he was lying on top of a duvet that was not his own. And he was naked. And he was alone.

Zuko’s eyes sprang open. He was lying flat on his back on the bed. His clothes had been folded and set next to his feet, and the clothes Aang had been wearing were gone along with the kid himself. A sinking feeling flooded Zuko’s chest, pinning him to the mattress.

He had fucked Aang. 

The whole destiny of the world was thrown in to disarray because he lost his head for a moment. Aang must have woken up and realized they made a terrible mistake, so he left. Was he mad? Embarrassed? In pain, from the assault Zuko ravaged on his body? A red hot feeling coursed through Zuko, so shameful he wanted to die.

How were they going to build a city together now? Even more importantly, or maybe just more important to Zuko, how was this going to impact their friendship? And what would Mai think?

Zuko cringed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Mai. Not once last night had he told himself that what he was doing was an insult to Mai, not even once. It just hadn’t felt like it at the time. He’d never cheated on her before, but they broke up so many times and dated other people, so that feeling of ownership just wasn’t there. But they were very much in a relationship now, one that had gotten serious without Zuko quite meaning it to. Fucking someone else, much less a male, much less the person he spent more time with than Mai herself? Yeah, he didn’t need to guess what her reaction would be. 

He wondered if he could take a hit out on himself and frame it as a horrible accident. 

A sound came from the bathroom. The sound of something splashing around in water. Zuko hesitated, then pulled on his pants, and walked to the ajar bathroom door. Aang was standing in front of the dingy mirror, swishing a stone blade in a cup of water. The same cup they had used last night. Half his head was covered in shaving soap, the other half perfectly smooth. He dragged the blade across the top of his head, adding another clean swath, and wiped the excess foam on the edge of the cup, dunking his blade back into the water. He looked up and met Zuko’s eyes in the mirror.

“Hey, you’re awake.” He smiled. “Want to grab breakfast before we go?”

“Um,” Zuko swallowed heavily. “I’m not really hungry, actually.”

“No problem. There’s some fruit in a bag on Appa’s back; we can eat that if he and Momo didn’t get to it first.”

“Sounds good,” said Zuko, watching Aang and feeling rather out of his body.

“I’m almost done here, then we can head out.”

“Do you shave your head every morning?”

“Yeah, it’s kind of a ritual at this point. I hate having any amount of hair.”

Zuko thought involuntarily of the hair elsewhere on Aang’s body, and blushed. “I’ll get dressed.” 

Once Aang had finished shaving his head and face and Zuko had re-dressed in the attire that was much too formal for daytime, they checked out of the inn and followed the innkeeper’s directions to the nearest monorail station.

As they walked, Aang cleared his throat. “So, I don’t know about you, but I think maybe we can push back our work a week. Take the rest of the week off, recharge. What do you think?” 

A day ago, Zuko would have been livid at this suggestion, but the thought of work right now was too much for him. He sighed.

“Okay, we can do that. But I should go home. I can’t spend two weeks straight away from the Fire Nation.”

“Yeah, definitely. Appa will take you to Caldera.”

“Thanks.” They continued walking in silence for a minute, but Zuko couldn’t go without addressing the elephant-rhino in the room.

“So…” he began. “Last night.”

“Yeah.” Aang met his eyes with an embarrassed smile. 

“Last night was, uh. Last night—well. Last night was…. not very nice to my girlfriend,” he said awkwardly.

Aang looked down. “Yeah.”

Zuko wanted to kick himself. “But, like, you know. It made sense. How we got swept up in the moment. It’s not like we planned it. But I shouldn’t have.”

Aang’s mouth quirked in a guilty, humorless smile. He seemed to be internally debating something, then finally spoke. “I have a confession. I didn’t plan it this way originally, but once we were back in the room I gave you that tea because I wanted to seduce you, and I didn’t want to do it when you were drunk.”

“Oh,” said Zuko, his cheeks flaming. 

“Yeah. So, I guess _I’m_ the one who betrayed Mai.”

“Well, you’re not the one who made a promise not to,” Zuko groaned.

Aang didn’t respond.

After a few minutes of silence they reached the train station. Part of Zuko was okay with dropping the subject, but another part of him felt like if they didn’t talk about it, it was like it never happened.

“So you wanted to seduce me?” Zuko asked, keeping his voice down, though the station was mostly empty.

Aang laughed, embarrassed. “Yeah.”

“Wow. Um. Sort of a weird question, but was it because you wanted to… explore your sexuality?” _And if so, why didn’t you pick someone up at the bar and leave me out of it_ , he wanted to add, but didn’t dare.

Aang gave him a weird look, raising one eyebrow. 

“Or, what? Was it because of me specifically? Did it, like, mean something to you?”

Now both of Aang’s eyebrows were high on his forehead. He took a deep breath. “You’re one of the people I’ve been the closest to for three years. It’s a little—I dunno, insulting?—that you have to ask if it meant something.”

Zuko shook his head. “No, you’re right, I know. I’m sorry. It’s just. I feel the same, and I have a girlfriend, and I just feel… weird.”

“I understand.” He gave Zuko a small smile edged with sympathy and something indecipherable. 

They took the brief train ride in near silence. At the upper ring station’s post office, Zuko sent a messenger hawk to Suki, alerting her of his whereabouts and where he was headed next.

When they finally reached Appa and Momo, they discovered the animals had eaten most of the fruit, save for a banana and a plum. Zuko’s appetite was still gone, and he tried not to watch as Aang ate, the plum juice dripping down his chin, the banana looking obscene next to his mouth. Aang was talking about something—something to do with their city’s future police force—but Zuko could barely concentrate. 

“It’s just that she and I have different ideas of what constitutes police brutality. But we have time to work all that out,” Aang said, throwing the banana peel into a patch of weeds. “Okay, let’s get you home.”

Aang used a gust of air to leap onto Appa’s back, and reached his hand down to Zuko. Zuko hesitated, then grabbed Aang’s hand as he climbed Appa, Aang pulling him into the saddle. Aang slid down Appa’s shoulders onto the top of his head and grabbed his reins. “Yip yip.”

The ground rumbled beneath them, and in a few moments they were soaring over the sprawling streets of Ba Sing Se. _What a city,_ thought Zuko. What happens in Ba Sing Se haunts you forever.

Aang climbed up Appa’s shoulders and back into the saddle. He laid down on his back, elbows bent and hands behind his head. “Nice day out,” he said, smiling.

Zuko had no idea what to do, so he said, “Uh, yeah,” and laid down next to Aang. “Nice clouds… fluffy.” He had deja vu to his war balloon ride with Sokka over three years ago, but this was somehow both more awkward and more comfortable. 

“Mmm-hm,” Aang agreed. “That one looks kind of like a sky bison.” He pointed to a large round cloud. 

“They…all…kind of look like sky bison,” Zuko mused.

“Nuh-uh! That one looks like Bumi’s hair.”

“It doesn’t; it’s not pointy enough.”

They spent the rest of the ride like this, chatting idly about lighthearted things, lying on their backs and pointing up at the sky. Zuko was grateful for the opportunity to stop _thinking_ and to just _be_.

As the sun rose and then fell in the sky, the air around them grew warmer and more humid as they entered Fire Nation skies. Aang sat upright and peeked over the side of the saddle. “Getting there,” he commented, and then laid back down, rolling on his side toward Zuko and propping his head up. “Remember, we have a bunch of work to do next week. Don’t have _too_ much fun at home.”

Zuko scoffed. “I’ve been working my hands to the bone!”

Aang reached his free hand out to grab one of Zuko’s, inspecting it in the blazing glow of the sunset. “Nah,” he said. He met Zuko’s eyes and his face lit up, and suddenly he leaned over and kissed Zuko hard on the mouth. Aang pulled away immediately as a wave of stupid delight washed over Zuko.

“Sorry,” Aang said, smirking slightly, his eyes cast down. “Anyway…”

He sat upright and climbed out of the saddle, sliding back down to Appa’s head, and steered him into a descent. 

After a fashion, they landed in Caldera’s royal plaza, which was filled with dozens of royal subjects and people of nobility, who turned to watch them. Zuko slid down Appa’s side and landed on his feet, dusting off the trace amounts of fur his clothes collected.

“See you next week, Zuko. Take care of yourself!” Aang called down to him. “Alright, buddy. Yip yip!” With another earth shaking leap, Appa was airborne, and within seconds he and Aang were shrinking into the purple horizon. 

Zuko stood there, watching their retreating shape. Take care of himself. Yes. Well. Okay, then. His head spun.

“Zuko!” came a low, flat female voice from behind him.

“Mai?” He whirled around. 

His girlfriend stood there in a long red dress, her golden-brown eyes full of concern and relief.

“I’m so glad you’re okay; I wasn’t expecting you to be in town tonight. Ty Lee told me you hadn’t come home by the time she left the city this morning. She said Suki went after you but that she also never returned to the city last night.”

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’d forgotten to tell them. I went out with Aang and Sokka. Suki found us; now she’s with Sokka somewhere.”

Mai raised her eyebrows. “You went _out?_ And didn’t tell your guards?”

“Yeah. That was stupid of me not to tell them. I wasn’t trying to keep it secret; I legitimately forgot.”

“Okay…” Mai said. Zuko knew her long enough to distinguish the nuances of her monotone, and she wasn’t happy.

“Yeah, um, Aang and Katara broke up, so Sokka dragged us out. It was all very last minute.”

“They broke up? That’s too bad,” said Mai nonchalantly. “Well, at least I know Aang and Sokka are good influences. I’m glad you’re home. Come over; my cook is making a tuna steak dinner.” She smiled and put a hand on his shoulder.

Guilt sucked at the center of his chest. “That sounds amazing, babe,” he said, kissing the shining bangs that covered her forehead. “But I’m still hungover. Raincheck?”

Mai punched him lightly in the stomach. “You should have taken some of your uncle’s sobriety tea.”

“I know, but I didn’t think I would be going out.”

She smoothed back his hair, which was still hanging down around his face, and looked into his eyes. “Yeah, you look off. Get some rest, babe. I’ll come see you tomorrow.”

“Thank you.” He kissed her, wondering as he did if she could taste all the sins his lips committed in the dark.

**********

When his personal servant, Kato, came to deliver his eight o’ clock wake up call, Zuko pretended he had slept through the night, though the haunted look in his eyes proved otherwise. Ever loyal, Kato didn’t mention it.

He set Zuko’s tea tray on his bedside table. “Shall I run a bath for you, Lord Zuko?”

“No, thank you.” He had bathed immediately after leaving Mai last night, but his restless tossing and turning had left him feeling unclean. “Actually—yes.”

Kato bowed and then exited to the bathroom attached to Zuko’s chamber. Zuko sighed, and stared at his tea. He would need something a little stronger. 

Once his bath was drawn, he asked Kato to get him an extra teabag and something for breakfast. 

Zuko sunk into the hot water, feeling it glide against his tense muscles. He tried to clear his mind, imagining he could feel the tension leaving his body, but the hallow space behind his eyeballs pounded. The water made a soft sloshing sound, and again he was reminded of that little wooden cup, of everything.

_Aang._ That word, that face, that boy. It consumed him like a fire. Every move, every sound Aang had made, was burned into Zuko’s brain. How could he keep pretending to Mai that nothing had happened? She would look into his eyes and know something had changed. It felt as tangible to him as the scar on his face.

When he returned to his bedchamber, the teacup held two teabags and was steaming away, newly heated. He lifted the lid of the metal tureen next to it to find a hearty breakfast of steak and eggs, which he attacked with vigor, forgetting his princely manners. With his belly full for the first time in a day and a half, he quickly succumbed to the sleep that had eluded him. 

He slept dreamlessly for the second time in a row, and when he returned to consciousness it felt like climbing out of a deep well. 

“Hnngh,” he moaned as someone shook him roughly.

“Zuko, for gods’ sake!” came an angry female voice, and he felt a small but strong punch on his leg.

“Mai?” he mumbled as her face solidified in front of him in the too-bright room.

“What the hell, Zuko! You’ve been passed out for like, sixteen hours! It’s lunchtime!”

Zuko groaned. It had been three hours, tops.

“Sorry, babe. I woke up to eat and bathe this morning but I still felt pretty shitty.” 

“You must have drank a _lot_ ,” she sneered, handing him his still-full teacup. “I’ve never seen you like this.”

“I’ve never _been_ like this,” he said, taking the teacup in one hand and lighting a small fire beneath it with the other. “I guess I’m just getting old.”

The sharpness in her eyes softened, and she kissed his cheek. “Yeah, I guess you are. Almost twenty. Ugh.” She stuck her tongue out in a look of mock disgust. 

“Ha.” He took a sip from his warm teacup. She watched him, expectantly. He took another sip. 

He cleared his throat. “Hey, babe, can you go to the kitchens and ask them to whip us up something for lunch while I get dressed?”

Her eyes narrowed. “Why don’t I just wait for you and we can go together?”

“I, uh… also have to use the bathroom. Been asleep for a while.”

“Got it.” She stood and kissed him again on the forehead. “Want anything particular for lunch?”

“Whatever you want is fine.”

She smiled and swept out of the room.

Zuko sipped his tea again. And again. He did not want to follow her. 

**********

The table in the royal dining room was much too large for just the two of them to sit comfortably, so they took lunch at a smaller table on the veranda. It was a warm but mild day, a thick canopy of red brocade shielding them from the worst of the sun. 

A couple of servants delivered the meal, a spread of salads, fruit, and seafood. None of it seemed particularly appetizing to Zuko at the moment, but he added each to his plate as Mai chattered banally across from him.

He took a sip from the glass of white wine they’d been served, and Mai stopped mid-sentence, raising an eyebrow. 

“A little ‘hair of the eelhound?’”

“Hmm?” He looked down at his glass. “Oh—yeah. I hear it’s the best hangover cure.”

“That’s a myth,” she said, reaching across the small table and pulling the glass out of his hand. “You’ll just get sick all over again.”

Zuko narrowed his eyes, annoyance pulsing through him. Why did she always have to treat him like an ignorant child? 

Mai speared a few melon chunks with her fork. “You better not get that drunk on your birthday,” she said, and then ate them. 

Zuko said nothing as she chewed.

She swallowed. “I was thinking we could have your friends meet us for dinner at Flaming O on your birthday. It’s supposed to be really nice. Now, I know they can dress up when they need to and that no one really cares what they act like since they’re _heroes_ , or whatever, but do you think you can talk to them about not causing a scene? I really don’t want to deal with Katara waterbending at the waitstaff again. What that waiter said was out of line, but that was embarrassing. Although, I guess since she broke up with Aang you don’t have to invite her.”

Zuko shoveled a piece of sea bass into his mouth, swallowing without tasting. “Uh, I don’t really want to go to Flaming O.”

Mai stared at him. “Ohhh-kay, but your birthday is coming up and you haven’t made any plans.”

Zuko shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m just not that into it this year.”

“So then why don’t you just let me handle it?”

“I just—don’t feel like doing anything, sorry.”

She stared at him for a long moment, calculating. “Fine.”

“No surprise parties, either.”

“Fine!” she yelled. “I hate parties anyway!”

“Of course you do.”

“What the hell is your problem?” said Mai, pushing herself away from the table. 

“Nothing!” Zuko yelled. “It’s—nothing, Mai.”

She crossed her arms and looked away from him. 

“Mai, I’m sorry. I know I’m in a shitty mood and taking it out on you.”

She scoffed.

“Babe, I love you, but I’m just—” he sighed, and then stood up quickly, growling frustration as he punched a fireball off the veranda. 

“You need to chill the fuck out, okay?” Mai yelled, jumping to her feet as well.

“Okay! Fine! I guess I do! And I’m sorry, but having you around right now is really stressing me out!”

The anger on her face was replaced with shock and hurt. “Why?” 

Guilt gnawed at him.

“I don’t know. I don’t know, I don’t know.” Maybe if he kept repeating it it would feel like the truth. “Mai, I’m sorry, but I can’t do this right now.”

“Do _what_?” she shrieked incredulously.

“I just—need some fucking space, okay?”

“Space like what? Like for the day? Or you’re breaking up with me again?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to go there right away, but you’re saying it, so yeah. I guess I am.”

“Oh, fuck you,” she yelled, shoving his shoulder. She was beginning to cry, her face red. “Seriously, fuck you, you’re so full of shit! I didn’t do anything to you! You probably saw how much fun Aang was having being single and decided you don’t want to be with me anymore. You are fucked”—she shoved his shoulder again—“up!” He caught her hand before she could shove him a third time and pulled her into a hug, her small shoulders bouncing with angry sobs.

“Please stop, Mai, I’m sorry,” he said, starting to cry himself. “I’m being an asshole, I know. I’m sorry!” She continued to sob, soaking the collar of his robe. “It’s not your fault. It’s me, I’m fucked up. I’m dysfunctional. I can’t be a good boyfriend right now, or any kind of boyfriend. You know how I get, I’m a piece of shit sometimes.”

After a few minutes of crying on him, Mai lifted her face from his shoulder and wiped at it with her hands, further smearing the tracks of her mascara. “I’m so done with this. I’m so done with you, Zuko.”

He said nothing as she slipped out of his arms, staring at her through the tears that were steadily leaking from his eyes. She took a gasp of air, apparently done crying for now. 

“I’m sorry,” he said again pathetically.

“You’re not. But you will be. In a couple months when you come crawling back, because I’m not going to be this stupid again.” She wiped at her eyes again, staining the heel of her hand black. “This is the fifth fucking time you’ve done this to me!” she screamed suddenly, explosive with anger again.

“No, it’s not!” Zuko yelled back. “I didn’t dump you all of those times! I broke up with you twice and you broke up with me twice!”

“Only because of the stupid shit you did! Either way, Zuko, why the _fuck_ would I keep letting you hurt me after all the promises you’ve broken? I’m the village idiot of Caldera! Everyone knows you don’t really love me.” Her voice wavered. “Whatever, I don’t care. I’m sick of you anyway. This was your last chance. It’s over for good.”

She stared at him for a few seconds, as if hoping he would tell her he took it all back, that it was a bad joke, that he didn’t really want to break up. He broke her gaze, staring at the floor.

She quickly turned on her heel and ran into the castle. Zuko felt as if his insides had been ripped out and piled on the floor at his feet, leaving him empty as a puppet. He hadn’t planned for any of that to happen. He sat down until Kato entered the veranda tentatively a minute later, asking if Zuko was done with his meal.

**********

Though his guilt weighed on him for the rest of the day, by the next morning he felt lighter than he had in a while. Sure, he would turn twenty and the nation would hear that he was no longer courting Mai, but anyone who had a problem with it could go fuck themselves, for all he cared. He was building a nation and helping restore harmony to the universe. He was undoing the generations of damage laid down by past Fire Lords, and that was far more important than a trivial marriage. He felt bad that he hurt Mai, but ultimately she was right. They would never work out together. He did love her, but not in the way that she needed—otherwise, he never would have been able to do what he did with Aang.

His mind was consumed with thoughts of Aang. Not just the memory of their night together, but the present and future. Where was Aang now? Alone, feeling the sting of rejection from both Katara and Zuko? Balls-deep in some Ba Sing Se escort? Meditating through the spirit world, infinitely above the human one and all its sticky entanglements, Zuko included?

No, Zuko chided himself, there was no way. Zuko saw something in Aang that night that he couldn’t have seen if Aang didn’t feel the same way. It was like a little piece of Aang’s soul had become embedded in him, and vice versa. He probably just left Caldera in such a hurry because he spotted Mai before Zuko did.

Zuko wanted to send Aang a letter to tell him that he was single now, but every time he sat down to write it, the words seemed clumsy and desperate. He would meet with Aang in the Republic of Nations next week—whatever was between them would certainly come to light then. He had to rest and focus on being present for his nation—obsessing over it right now wouldn’t change anything.

Despite this wisdom, over the next few days, he thought of nothing but Aang. If his council noticed he was distracted, they probably attributed it to his breakup with Mai, and to his relief they said nothing.

He found himself imagining himself with Aang the same way he was with Mai, or the way Aang was with Katara. Kissing, cuddling, going on trips together just because. Massaging Aang’s shoulders after a long day at work. Aang running his fingers through Zuko’s hair as they fell asleep together. It seemed ridiculous in a way—boyfriend and boyfriend? Zuko didn’t know any couples like that, not personally. But in a deeper way, it seemed exactly right.

But what would people say?

They were already starting to talk; he could feel it. Everyone assumed he would marry Mai, not break up with her. If the citizens of the Fire Nation thought he left her for a boy, it would be tantamount to treason.

After the Fire Nation overthrew him, he wouldn’t even have refuge in the Republic of Nations, because what sort of founding fathers fucked each other? They and the whole damn restoration project would be the laughing stock of the entire world. He scowled when he remembered the story of Oma and Shu. When a man and a woman fell in love, they sometimes got a city named after them. When a man and a man fell in love, Zuko had no clue what happened, because no one seemed to want to talk about it. 

As the week dragged on, more slowly than Zuko thought possible, he found himself becoming restless. He donned his usual disguise—a dark red cowl with a hood that covered the top of his face. A few people who lived in the area might have figured out it was him, but he didn’t care as long as they didn’t bother him. Suki and Ty Lee were standing guard outside the castle as he left, and they followed him to the nearby bazaar, hiding in the shadows.

He meandered through the crowd, people-watching. His citizens were so spirited in summer, and it warmed his heart. During Ozai’s reign, the nation suffocated under a miasma of formality, and not even children dared to dance or play in public unless it was during one of the state-approved holidays. 

How quickly things had changed! A little girl with a garland of panda lilies on her head chased an even smaller boy, laughing when she dodged the puff of smoke he sent back at her. A young woman sat on her boyfriend’s lap in a bench in the plaza, feeding him fire flakes. Just a few years ago, that would have been illegal. A few older people eyed the children and the young couple with distaste. 

“This country is going to hell,” he heard an old man mutter to his tiny wife. “Just look at this trash.” 

Zuko’s eyes followed to where the man was pointing, and his heart leapt into his throat.

It was a wooden rack covered in newspapers and magazines. Front and center was the Fire Nation’s most popular teen magazine, Tiger-Seal Beat. On the cover was a highly realistic drawing of Aang surfing on ice as he was waterbending. The artist captured his roguish smile, defined arms and legs, and the definition in his jaw. “Daang!” was printed across the bottom in bubble characters.

Zuko waited until the elderly couple had moved on, then casually picked up the Tiger-Seal Beat. He flipped through it until he found another drawing of Aang, this time zooming straight up into the sky on his glider shirtless, his ab muscles (overemphasized by the artist) on full display. The picture took up the whole left page, and on the right page there was an article, also titled “Daang!”

**For many pre-teen girls around the world, Avatar Aang was a beloved first crush. From the lucky few who met him before his legendary defeat of Fire Lord Ozai, to those who had only heard the legends, the youthful and outgoing Avatar was a breath of fresh air. But youthful he was: Aang was barely thirteen when he removed the Fire Lord's bending, an unprecedented act. His Air Nomad abnegation combined with innocence to rival a Ba Sing Se noblewoman has caused many to think of him as an untouchable symbol of virtue.**

**Well, think again! Rumor has it that Aang has split from longtime girlfriend Katara of the Water Tribe, the beautiful and deadly warrior who assisted him in Ozai's defeat, and according to sources close to the Avatar, now sixteen, the relationship definitely got hot and heavy.**

**That's right, sweet sixteen--and my, how he's grown into it well. Spotted ice-surfing off the coast of Whale Tale Island, Aang has gone from tiny monk to handsome hunk!**

**All you Fire Lord Zuko fangirls and Sokka sweethearts will change your tune soon enough--he's the master of all four elements, but can YOU be the master of Aang's heart?**

Zuko slammed the magazine shut and put it back on the shelf, feeling sick with embarrassment. It was bad enough that they wrote all that stuff about Aang, but they had to drag his name into it? It made him wonder if similar articles had been written about him. It wasn't like he had a subscription to Tiger-Seal Beat.

‘Sources close to the Avatar?’ Zuko suddenly remembered how Aang had told the girls at the Lotus Lounge that he and Katara “do it.” He groaned. 

It was only a matter of time before everyone else saw what Zuko saw when he looked at Aang. A good-looking Avatar had all the options in the world. 

His thirst for adventure prematurely sated, Zuko walked back to the castle. Again, he was torn between sending a letter to Aang _right now_ —to win him over before someone else did—and just having faith that everything would work out if it was meant to be. 

The next day, Suki invited him to join the Kyoshi warriors for lunch. They didn’t often hang out socially unless Sokka was around, but it was a pleasant surprise. Zuko joined the five women at a discreet, fancy cafe. It had high windows to let in lots of natural light, and they were seated in the very middle of the restaurant. Zuko normally didn't like being the center of attention when he was just trying to go about his life, but he figured his warriors would deter any paparazzi or rabid fans. 

He ordered strong black tea and a soup of seafood and noodles, mostly listening to the girls talk and interjecting occasionally, feeling content. It was nice being around people who didn’t demand anything of him. 

He was sitting in the corner, next to Ty Lee and across from Suki. There was also Katsumi, a tall but baby-faced girl with long black hair that she wore in many braids; Naomi, a shorter, muscular girl with dark eyes; and Fu Hao, who looked mean but was actually quite pleasant. 

When he was about halfway through his noodles and the others were engaged in a discussion about the pros and cons of archery in battle, Ty Lee turned to him.

“So,” she begin tentatively, “how’ve you been? I mean, regarding the whole Mai thing.”

Zuko smiled slightly. “I’m doing fine.”

Ty Lee brightened. “You seem fine! Really good, actually. That’s good.”

“Yeah, but you know. I feel bad about how it… transpired. How’s Mai doing?” He lifted his tea to his lips, taking a sip.

“She’s really really good, actually!”

“Really? That’s—that’s great!”

“Yeah, she actually just left town this morning. She always wanted to travel, and since she—well, you know, she doesn’t have anything else, uh, going on, she decided to take an air balloon and just go!”

Zuko blinked. “Oh? Go where?”

“Well, I’m not sure where she’s stopping along the way, but I know she wants to visit the North Pole.”

Zuko imagined Mai among the elegant but fearsome Northern Water Tribe. She’d probably enjoy it there. He couldn’t believe their breakup had driven her out of town. Embarrassingly, he never knew she wanted to see the world. She didn’t ask him a whole lot about the places he saw while he was banished. 

“Is she planning on traveling for a while?” Zuko asked, hoping he sounded casual.

“Uh, yeah, I think so,” said Ty Lee sympathetically. 

“Well,” said Zuko, at a bit of a loss. “I wish her the best. I’m sure she’ll have lots of exciting adventures.”

“Definitely!” said Ty Lee, smiling as she tore a sticky bun apart with her hands. 

Zuko took a long sip of his tea and caught Suki’s eye across the table. “How’s was Sokka’s comedown from the cactus juice?”

Suki laughed.

“Wait, _what_?” Ty Lee gasped, and the other girls laughed while Suki quickly filled them in on the weekend’s events. 

“He was fine,” she added at the end. “The only thing he was embarrassed about was that I saw him flirting with so many girls, but I’m not an idiot.” She rolled her eyes and took a sip from her drink. “I know how he is.”

Zuko had no reply to that, so he polished off his noodles, scooping the bottom of the bowl with his spoon to get the last of the broth. He felt comfortably full, and better than he had in days. He leaned back into his seat.

Suki startled, and leaned forward toward Zuko. “Oh my god, I just remembered something! I can’t believe I haven't told you this yet; I just found out today and it slipped my mind.”

“Uh oh, what is it?”

“Something great!” she beamed. “Katara and Aang got back together. Sokka wrote me. Said that the night after they broke up Aang went to the Southern Water Tribe and spent a bunch of time with her, taking her to do all the romantic things that he was usually too busy for, and really won her back in a big way.” Suki beamed. “I guess he had to lose her to realize he couldn’t live without her. I’m glad he didn’t wait too long!”

“Aww!” said Fu Hao.

“They’re such a good couple,” commented Katsumi.

“Fire Lord?” said Naomi. “No disrespect, your highness, but you look—pale.”

They all turned to look at him. Zuko thought he might be past ‘pale;’ he felt like he was turning green. Everything seemed to tunnel around him. 

Ty Lee covered her mouth with her hand. “Suki, he just had a breakup!”

Suki’s eyes widened. “Zuko, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to rub it in your face!”

“No, it’s not—it’s fine,” Zuko stammered. It felt like the soup was rising up his esophagus, making him want to vomit. He put his head in his hands. He noticed dimly that Suki was looking very alarmed, and wanted to let her know it wasn’t her fault, but couldn’t find the words as his head swam.

He reached into his robe and pulled out a small satchel full of gold. He handed it to Naomi. “Can you please handle the check? Sorry, I’m not feeling well.”

“Of course, sir,” she said, and stood. Out of the corner of his eye Zuko saw Ty Lee gesturing for Fu Hao and Katsumi to join Naomi, and the three girls walked toward the bar. 

Ty Lee turned to Zuko and wrapped her arms around him. “I promise it’s going to be okay!” she said. “Mai’s my best friend, and she means the world to me, but you’re my friend too! And we’re here for you.” She broke the hug and gestured to Suki, who nodded. 

“I’m sorry Zuko, that was insensitive of me.” said Suki. “It just seems like you’re so much happier now. I’m sorry if I’m being presumptuous, but if you’re feeling relieved, it’s a sign that breaking up was the right decision.”

Ty Lee nodded adamantly. “You’ll find true love, just like Aang and Katara! But you can’t do it if you keep hanging on to the past.”

Zuko drained his tea miserably. He couldn't find comfort in their words when they only knew half the truth.

Suki and Ty Lee exchanged a sad look that made Zuko’s skin crawl. Ty Lee put her hand on his shoulder.

“What’s it going to take to get you to feel better?”

Zuko stared into his tea leaves. He’d been through worse rejections, worse heartbreaks that almost broke him completely, but didn’t. And there was really only one reason for that. 

Uncle Iroh.

“I’m going to the Jasmine Dragon,” he told them. The girls nodded, and without a word they all stood and made for the door.


	3. The Tales of Ba Sing Se

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is in the air. Zuko is allergic.

ONE YEAR LATER

Zuko’s bungalow in the Republic was more of a proper house now, with the addition of several rooms and a respectable backyard. He unwrapped some red flowers he picked up downtown and placed them in a tall vase he’d filled with water. He thought it would be a nice touch for when his guests arrived, and it made him happy to support Republic City shops. They were all brand new, and Zuko hoped he could help fan the fire and get the economy off to a great start.

He lit some incense, and then paced the room a few times. They were late, which was normal for them, but Zuko prided himself on punctuality. 

After a few minutes, he heard a commotion outside, and peaked through the blinds. An emu-horse drawn carriage was making its way up the path. Zuko opened the door and stood in the entrance way, raising a hand to shield his eyes against the sun. 

The carriage stopped, and Sokka stepped out before the conductor could dismount, offering his hand back up toward the carriage. Suki grabbed it, as well as one of his shoulders, and very slowly lowered herself down until Sokka caught her and brought her gently to the ground. She seemed so small to Zuko, in a plain green dress instead of her usual warrior robes.

They walked toward the house, and Zuko waved. They returned the gesture, grinning widely. 

“Fancy digs, my man,” said Sokka, grasping Zuko’s hand and bringing him into a hug. “Forget going back to the Fire Nation; you’ll just bring it to you!”

“It’s hardly a palace,” laughed Zuko as he embraced Suki. She felt a lot thinner and less muscular than he remembered. He led them inside, and poured them tea from the pot on the stove as they made themselves comfortable.

“You look great,” he said to Suki, who smiled. Her skin was covered in faint red scars left behind by the dragon pox. Zuko wasn’t sure if they would fade. He’d heard rumors that if you catch dragon pox as an adult, all the damage was permanent, but that could be a myth, and he didn’t want to bombard Suki with questions.

“Thank you.” It was true, she did look great compared to the day he found her in her bedchamber after failing to show up for security detail: sweaty, eyes glazed, unresponsive to anything he was saying, seemingly hallucinating. The blisters and shakes came later, after he had rushed her to the castle’s medic. He had a small bout of dragon pox as a child, so he wasn’t afraid for himself, just for her. 

He was certain she would die, but she started to recover within a couple of days. Unfortunately recovery was a long process, involving lots of bed rest while the sores on her skin were healed and her body was purged of infection. For someone who had been a fighter since she was young, it was understandably frustrating.

“I feel so much better,” said Suki, smiling as she sipped her tea. “I’m finally able to _move_. I can’t believe they made me lay down for a whole month for my _health_.”

“It was so you could make a full recovery, babe,” said Sokka, stroking her hair. “Get back to warrior shape.”

“Yeah,” Suki sighed. She lifted the sleeve of her robe and curled her bicep, showing Zuko. It was small. “Real warrior over here.” 

“Hey,” said Sokka, grabbing her arm and kissing the tiny muscle. “You were the one who taught me that it doesn't matter how big or strong you are when it comes to outsmarting your enemy.”

Suki smiled.

“Suki,” said Zuko. “Here’s the thing. As my personal guard, you’re invaluable to me. I’ll be so grateful when you’re able to resume your place as the leader of the Kyoshis. But as a friend and a person, you’re much more invaluable. So I’m really glad you're taking the time you need to get better.”

Suki rolled her eyes, smiling, and hugged Zuko. “Don’t make me all emotional.”

“I made the reservations tonight for Mu Mizu,” Sokka said as Suki settled back next to him. “Eight o’ clock.”

“I haven’t been yet; supposedly it’s the nicest place in town,” said Zuko.

“Well, it’s the only _really_ nice place in town,” said Sokka.

About six months ago, Zuko and Aang had the basis of the downtown area built by a team of talented earth benders and filled the buildings with shops, restaurants, and offices that were looking to lay down roots in the up-and-coming Republic City. They also had a city hall where they met with government representatives who had moved from other cities that were now a part of the Republic of Nations. The city population was still small, but growing steadily, and new businesses were cropping up daily, keeping the Department of Civic Bending and Planning busy.

“Aang’s in a meeting but he said he would come here afterward, then we can head out,” Zuko said. 

“Sounds good,” said Sokka. “Katara went to the police station when we got to town; I guess Toph is showing her some new metal bending thing she’s been using. They’ll probably just meet us there.”

Zuko brought out some seaweed snacks and a bowl of mixed nuts to hold them over. “Did Sokka keep you entertained while you were on bed rest?”

“She got sick of my puppet shows,” said Sokka, grabbing a handful of nuts.

“I did not!” she smacked his knee lightly. She looked at Zuko. “He made these really cute hand puppets of us and would act out their adventures. It was great. But, actually, I started writing. And once I started I couldn’t stop!” She smiled apologetically at Sokka, who smiled warmly back.

“What did you write about?” Zuko asked.

“At first I was just writing down my fighting techniques so I wouldn’t forget them. But it evolved to become sort of a warrior’s code and fighting guide—I don’t even know what you’d call it, I’ve never been into literature. All I know is that makes me feel like I’m doing _something_ useful.”

“That sounds incredible,” said Zuko. “I’d love to read it when you’re finished, if you don’t mind.”

“You’ll get your chance; she’s going to publish it and sell it in all the bookstands of Republic City!” Sokka squeezed Suki’s knee. 

“We’ll see,” said Suki smiling self-consciously.

A bell chimed from the front door, and Zuko answered it. Aang was there with his glider, and he grinned as he walked in. “Hey, Zuko.”

“Hey.” Zuko’s prediction a year ago had been correct; Aang had grown a few inches taller and was starting to fill out a bit as well, though he was still thin and lanky. His face was changing, becoming less babyish. It embarrassed Zuko to think about how young Aang looked a year ago, and he usually tried not to. “Sokka and Suki are here, come have some tea.”

Zuko poured more tea as everyone greeted each other, embracing. 

They talked for another hour, Suki filling Aang in on her condition and her newfound love of writing. Eventually, she nudged Sokka.

“We should start getting ready for dinner.”

Sokka eyed the big gold clock that was ticking away above the fireplace. “Damn, you’re right.”

“Everything you need for showers is laid on the counter of the guest bathroom.”

“Is the shower big enough for two?” Sokka asked, and Aang laughed.

“It’s because I just got off bed rest and he thinks I still need help!” Suki protested, laughing with Aang.

“Oh yeah, it’s huge,” said Zuko. “You crazy kids have fun.”

Suki shook her head as they got up, giggling. Sokka picked her up like a baby and she shrieked, laughing as he carried her down the hall to the guest room. 

“Oh, young love,” said Aang, rolling his eyes.

“Who needs it?” said Zuko, smirking and picking at a chip in his teacup.

“Eh, it’s probably not the _most_ important thing,” Aang mused, watching Zuko.

“Hopefully not, or I’m fucked.”

“Wah, poor Zuko, it’s so lonely being the Fire Lord.” Aang pouted.

Zuko smirked again. “Speaking of young love, how’s Katara? You guys good?”

“Mmm. Good,” Aang replied unconvincingly, looking away. 

Zuko’s heart leapt and his cheeks burned. _Don’t get your hopes up don’t get your hopes up don’t—_

“You—sure?” he asked, hoping his voice sounded normal.

“Uhhhh… yeah, I’m sure. I just—I don’t know. This sounds really crazy, but I think she’s hiding something from me.” He looked back at Zuko, their eyes meeting.

“Like what?”

“Not sure. She’s been really distant lately, but she also seems happy, definitely not mad at me or anything. Every time I talk to her about, just, normal stuff, she replies with one word answers. I even asked her if everything was okay and if she needed to tell me anything, and she just changed the subject! Didn’t even deny it.”

Zuko let that sink in, unsure how to feel about it. He wanted Aang so badly. Every day spent at work on Republic City was fresh torture for Zuko. They used to spend a lot of time alone together; since that night in Ba Sing Se they rarely ever did. But it didn’t make a difference. Every time Aang fixed him with a casual smile from across a crowded room, as if that night had been erased from his memory, Zuko felt like he was being spit-roasted over an open flame. 

And yet. The one time Aang rushed into Zuko’s arms he was still stinging from Katara’s rejection, and after dropping off Zuko immediately rushed back to her. Why repeat history? What was so great about Katara; how did she ever think she could do better than Aang? He found himself burning with an irrational rage.

“Whatever, it’s stupid,” Aang said, leaning back in his chair. “I don’t even care what she’s hiding. I just wish she wasn’t hiding it, you know?”

Zuko was pretty sure he didn’t know, but just said, “Yeah, I get you.”

He heard the guest shower shut off, the pipes running through the walls going quiet.

Aang chewed his bottom lip, making it slightly swollen. “So, Mu Mizu, huh?”

“Yup. You been?”

“I checked it out when they first opened, but they didn’t have a lot of vegetarian options. I guess Sokka told them I was a vegetarian, and they added a whole extra menu. So… that’s pretty cool.”

“Yeah.”

They sat in semi-comfortable silence until Suki entered the living room, wearing a beautiful high-collared dress that had some elements of her warrior uniform without all the heavy armor.

“Where’s Sokka?” Aang asked.

“He’s getting himself ready,” Suki said. “He did my hair for me.” She showed off a golden fan-shaped pin in her updo.

“Nice,” said Aang. 

Sokka came out a few minutes later, his hair styled the same way he wore it in Ba Sing Se last year. He was also wearing the same fancy water tribe clothing. Zuko and Aang were already dressed in their formal wear, so they each had a drink before heading out. Zuko served firewhiskey sours to Suki, Sokka, and himself, and made Aang a sour soda.

Suki was still too weak to travel by bison, but their carriage had returned to take them to Mu Mizu. Appa was left to roam in Zuko’s backyard, which was probably uncomfortably small.

They arrived at a restaurant that resembled a turreted donjon, with sloping white lacquered panels and green trim. The conductor unrolled a green carpet leading out of the carriage, and they walked its path to Mu Mizu’s door. The maitre d’ ushered them to a chandelier-lit private room with a large, low table and plush green velvet cushions to sit on. 

Katara and Toph were already there, and rose to greet them. Katara went to Aang first, squeezing him tight with a giddy smile on her face. Thankfully, Toph pulled Zuko into a hug before he could see them kiss. 

Suki and Sokka took one side of the table, and Aang and Katara sat on the other side, leaving Zuko and Toph to take each end. Zuko was seated between Aang and Sokka.

The first course consisted of seaweed salad and miso soup. Aang filled the others in on the new businesses that had popped up in Republic City. Sokka and Suki asked questions, but Katara was unusually tight-lipped. 

“So, how did you like the police station?” Aang asked Katara. 

“Oh,” she said. “It was really cool.” She shoved a spoonful of miso soup in her mouth. Aang turned to catch Zuko’s eye, as if to say, _see?_ Zuko returned his look with a blank stare, burning inside. 

The second course consisted of thinly sliced raw fish in a succulent sauce, and the third was slow-braised beef. Aang was brought stir-fried vegetables and grilled tofu, respectively. Zuko drank more than his share of white wine from a carafe on the men’s side of the table, and it was replaced. Every time Aang glanced at Katara, worry knitting his brows, Zuko took a sip.

Finally, when the dessert had been served—creme brûlée with a caramelized surface that shone like stained glass—Sokka raised his cup. “Suki and I have an announcement to make.”

Everyone stopped and turned toward them. Aang had just cracked the top of his creme brûlée, and was paused awkwardly with his spoon hovering. Katara was smiling, her hands clasped together in excitement.

Suki smiled and folded the collar of her dress down, revealing a Water Tribe betrothal necklace, its deep blue contrasting with the green of her outfit. 

“We’re getting married!” Sokka shouted. 

“Whoa!” Aang said, dropping his spoon. It clattered against the desert ramekin loudly. 

“Congratulations, man!” said Zuko, reaching out to grab Sokka’s shoulder and shake it. 

“Yeah…wow. Nice job, Sokka,” said Toph, giving Suki a playful smile before taking a sip of her wine. 

Katara squealed. “I’m so happy! And I knew that necklace would look amazing on you!”

Sokka smiled sheepishly at Suki. “Katara helped me pick it out.”

Suki touched the carved stone hanging from the choker. It looked vaguely square-shaped, but upon closer inspection Zuko saw that it was a circle with four smaller circles placed evenly around it, giving it the appearance of corners. “I kind of figured. You both did great.” She kissed Sokka on the cheek.

“You already knew?” Aang asked.

Katara grinned. “I’ve known for _weeks_! It was so torturous not being able to tell you! I could barely even talk to you. You probably noticed something was up.”

Aang shrugged. “Yeah, kind of.” He briefly caught Zuko’s eye and gave a small smile that Zuko didn’t return. He was starting to feel a bit queasy. Now that Sokka was getting married, would people expect Zuko to start courting someone? And what if Aang and Katara were next?

“When’s the wedding?” Toph asked. 

“We’re setting the date about sixth months from now. It’ll be a winter wedding,” said Suki, smiling as Sokka put his arm around her shoulder, squeezing her to him.

“I guess you’ll be having it at the South Pole? Or, wait—on Kyoshi Island?” Zuko asked.

“Actually—“ Suki exchanged a look with Sokka. “We were thinking…” She hesitated.

Sokka looked from Aang to Zuko. “How do you guys feel about a wedding in Republic City?”

Aang laughed. “I think it’s a great idea!” Katara grinned and squeezed his arm.

“Yeah, definitely,” said Zuko. With sixth months notice, they could easily make it work. Since it would be the first high-profile wedding in Republic City, Zuko figured the whole town would come together to make it wonderful.

“We’re going to be inviting a lot of people, so it’s a little overwhelming,” said Suki. “But I was hoping that you two would be my bridesmaids.” She smiled at Toph and Katara. 

Katara squealed and said “Of course!” at the same time Toph asked, “Me?”

Suki laughed. “Yeah, definitely, Toph.”

Toph laughed awkwardly. “Um, I’d actually love to. I just figured you’d ask one of the Kyoshi warriors or something.” 

“Well, they’ll be part of the wedding! We have this sort of ritual whenever a warrior gets married. But you’ve been a great friend to me, and I’d love to have you by my side.”

Toph brushed her bangs out of her face, smiling self consciously. “Alright Fangirl, that’s just sappy enough to sway me.”

“And of course, you two are going to be my groomsmen,” said Sokka, pointing from Aang to Zuko. “Don’t make me beg.”

Zuko rolled his eyes. “Fiiiine.” 

“We better be!” said Aang. “Wait, which one is the best man?”

“You’ll have to fight for the honor.”

Aang looked at Zuko, eyes narrowed. They softened after a few seconds. “I guess we can share it,” he said.

“Honor is overrated,” said Zuko. 

Sokka raised his glass of wine. “Well, here’s a toast. To all of you for being in our wedding! And to this beautiful woman, for being with me.” He kissed Suki’s cheek. 

They all raised their glasses of wine (or in Aang’s case, lychee juice) and said, “To Sokka and Suki!”

Zuko drank, noticing as he did that he probably shouldn’t have much more. He set the glass down after one sip.

After they finish their dessert, Zuko insists on paying the check. He inherited so much money as the heir to the Fire Nation’s throne that it often embarrassed him. Luckily, he was able to justify it as a congratulatory dinner to Sokka and Suki.

He got his robe from the coat rack and put it on, noticing Toph’s small green overcoat. He brought it over to her, holding it out so she could put her arms in it, but she took it from him and put it on herself.

“So, I guess that makes us dates,” Zuko said.

Toph paused midway through pulling her sleeve over her shoulder. “Huh?”

“For the wedding,” he said. “Aang and Katara will walk down the aisle together, of course, so that leaves you and me as dates.”

Toph pulled her coat on all the way. “Aww. Yeah! How _platonic_ of you!” she said sarcastically, and stormed out of the room, following Katara, Sokka, and Suki. Aang was the only one who was still in the room, finishing the clasp on his airbender robe. 

He smiled pityingly at Zuko, who was dumbfounded. 

“What the hell is her problem?”

“Oh,” said Aang, checking the door nervously. Seeing that no one was left in earshot, he said, “Well, Toph’s always had a thing for Sokka. She never really talked about it but it’s been obvious to me for years.”

“Oh,” said Zuko. He supposed he had known that once. 

“Maybe she’s mad you only like her as a friend, too.”

Zuko glared at Aang. “She’ll get over it. Sometimes friendship has to be enough.” He walked out of the room, not looking at Aang once until they reached the carriages.

***********

SIX MONTHS LATER

Zuko sat alone in a private booth in the back of La La Lemongrass, an overly trendy restaurant in the middle ring of Ba Sing Se. It served a fusion of Earth Kingdom and Fire Nation cuisine that rose to popularity in the colonies, and Zuko had developed a taste for it during his stays in Republic City. He didn’t often dine at fancy restaurants, however; he usually had an assistant bring take-out boxes full of dim sum to the headquarters where he worked with Aang. Aang, incidentally, was one of the people on whom Zuko was currently waiting. The other was getting married in two days. 

The table had been serviced with a bottle of champagne in a crystal bucket, along with a small bottle of whiskey. Zuko left them untouched for now, sipping his third cup of jasmine tea. Last time he checked his pocket watch, it had been thirteen minutes after seven. He refused to check it again. Sokka and Aang were traveling together from Republic City, where they were entertaining guests visiting from the Southern Water Tribe. Zuko had come from the Fire Nation, but would be heading back to the city with them.

At last he heard Sokka’s carrying voice as he made small talk with the hostess. She pulled the red gauze curtain aside, letting Sokka and Aang into the small room.

“Hey!” Zuko stood and hugged Sokka. Despite his initial reaction to Sokka’s engagement, he was excited the big event was finally here. Everything had been arranged beautifully and the city was beside itself with excitement. There had been several headaches over the last six months—every business in town wanted a piece of the action—but that was all finally over, and Zuko could enjoy it fully.

He released Sokka and hugged Aang, who was even taller now. He seemed older too, but not in a bad way. The stress and responsibility of running a city while simultaneously being the Avatar weighed on him, but it also brought out a new, more mature side of him. He was almost a man now, Zuko thought. At least legally. How absurd, to think of what Aang had accomplished by this point. 

They sat at the table, both across from Zuko, who tried not to take it personally. 

“Can I bring you anything else to drink besides champagne and whiskey?” the hostess asked.

“Lychee juice would be awesome,” Aang said.

She bowed, and walked away.

“Nice choice,” Aang said, looking around. 

“Suki and I came here when we were in town to get her dress,” said Sokka, pouring two whiskeys. He passed one to Zuko, who pushed his teapot to the side.

“How are you feeling about the big day?” Zuko asked. 

Sokka took a sip, then smiled roguishly. “I know I’m supposed to say all that crap about having cold feet and getting tied down and whatnot, but, I dunno.” He shrugged. “I just want to be with her. Two days is too long.”

“Wow,” said Zuko. “So I guess that means no bachelor party after all? La La Lemongrass is it?”

“No,” said Sokka, slamming his whiskey glass on the table, where some sloshed out. “I’m only getting married once, damnit. I need to do it right.”

Zuko and Aang laughed, Aang rolling his eyes. The hostess came back with his lychee juice, along with a waiter. Sokka ordered plates for them all to share, based on things he had tried last time and suggestions made by the waiter.

Zuko and Sokka drained their whiskeys around the same time, and Zuko refilled them. 

“So, what do you mean by ‘doing it right?’” Zuko asked Sokka. “That sounds a little ominous.”

Sokka waved his hand. “Nothing _crazy_. I just want to go to a strip club.”

Zuko grimaced. “Do we have to?”

“Uh, yeah, dude. We have to!”

Zuko gave Aang a pointed look. Aang shrugged. 

“It’s alright with me, as long as the ladies aren’t being exploited,” he said, twiddling the straw of his juice. “I’ve never been to one, but I guess the lower ring clubs can be pretty bad. I hear the ones up here treat their dancers fairly.” He started drinking his juice, blushing. 

“I know, I’ve been,” Zuko sighed. He looked at Sokka. “What does Suki think of all this?”

“Dude, the girls are going to see male strippers tonight!”

Aang choked on his juice. He spit it back into the glass, coughing as Sokka thumped him on the back.

“You really didn’t know that?” Sokka asked, barely hiding a smile.

“I didn’t wanna know,” Aang said, recovering his breath. 

Zuko rolled his eyes. “I just really hate strip clubs.”

Sokka gave Zuko a sympathetic smile. “Zuko, buddy, I’m going to try to say this in the nicest way possible. It’s my bachelor party tonight, so don’t be a dick.”

Aang laughed. Zuko sneered. “Fine,” he groaned.

Sokka reached across to pat Zuko’s cheek. “You’re the best.”

The waiter arrived with plates of noodles, curries, dumplings, and spring rolls. Zuko didn’t see how they’d be able to eat it all, and felt guilty for being wasteful, but the food looked and smelled so delicious it actually made his mouth water. 

As Zuko took a little of everything and Aang took generous portions of the vegetarian fare, Sokka grabbed the champagne out of its crystal bucket and opened it, blowing the steam off the top. He poured glasses for himself and Zuko, and then a tiny, sip-sized amount for Aang before returning the bottle. 

Aang looked at the glass skeptically, but took it, to Zuko’s surprise. 

“I’d like to toast a toast,” said Sokka, raising his glass.

“Hear, hear!” said Aang.

“To the next great adventure—marriage. And to Suki! My future wife and all around mega babe.” 

Zuko waited for more, but that seemed to be it, so he and Aang saluted the air with their own glasses and said “To Sokka and Suki!” 

Zuko took a sip. Aang tilted his champagne flute upside down, draining it.

“Look at you,” said Zuko, grinning.

“Not as good as lychee juice,” said Aang. “But not terrible.” He immediately stuffed a spinach dumpling into his mouth, as if to negate this.

Zuko and Sokka followed suit, and begin eating. Sokka had been right—everything was insanely delicious. After his third helping of a little of everything, Zuko refilled his and Sokka’s champagnes.

“I just can’t believe you’re getting married,” he said, feeling a little tipsy. “I didn’t think you’d ever fully settle down.”

Sokka finished swallowing. “Honestly… neither did I. Remember how I told you my first girlfriend turned into the moon?”

Zuko nodded. He remembered when it happened, though he hadn’t known she was Sokka’s girlfriend at the time. It was Zhao’s fault she was gone. Though Zuko had been Zhao’s enemy, he was actively working against Team Avatar at the time, and felt guilty about any hardships they went through then.

“That kind of messed me up,” Sokka continued. “I didn’t like to think about the future, because anything could happen and nothing’s permanent. It seemed wrong to try and go against that.”

Aang glanced up from his noodles. “What changed your mind?”

“Well. I never really worried about Suki, you know? She’s a fighter, she can protect herself. Even when we were fighting Ozai and I thought she might be dead—I thought we all were going to die, in that moment, and then she saved me. It made me feel like she would always be able to finagle her way out of any situation. Until she got dragon pox.”

He shifted in his seat, gulping more champagne.

“I thought she was going to die. For real, this time. It didn’t matter how smart, strong, or brave she was, I was going to lose her and there was nothing I could do about it. She was stable within a few days, but it changed me. I knew that for however long we had together, I wanted her to be my wife.” 

Chills ran down Zuko’s spine, something pinching in his heart. He looked at Aang. Aang was nodding, eyes slightly unfocused, as if he understood.

Sokka laughed. “Is that heavy and sappy enough for you?”

Aang nodded again. “Definitely.”

“I’ll drink to that,” said Zuko, draining his glass. Sokka laughed again, and followed suit. 

They took a carriage to Screaming Orchid, in the section of the middle ring that dealt with hedonistic pleasures. The neon characters embellished with giant pink flowers felt conspicuous, and Zuko kept his hood up as he went in. Aang was wearing red secular robes, but made no effort to conceal his arrows. 

Due to their status, they were given a cushy table near the stage, and complimentary drinks. Zuko accepted a beer, sipping slowly, wanting to pace himself. Sokka took another whiskey.

A woman stepped onto the stage, her updo adorned with white lilies, wearing a long white cheongsam. Her lips were painted red, shining like cherries. An unseen pianist played sultry music from behind the stage as she begin to dance. She had a white fan in her hand, which she used to flick the buttons off her dress, one at a time, starting from the top. 

“Oh yeah,” said Sokka. The buttons hit the ground, rolling on the stage as she moved her hips slowly to the music. Her dress gapped open as each button disappeared, and as the final one fell she slipped out of it and placed it on a chair to the side of the stage. 

She wore nothing but a bra and underwear, and low heeled sandals. Her lingerie was lacy white silk, her full breasts straining against the cups of her bra, the darkness of her nipples visible beneath the sheer fabric. She ran her hands over them and down over her hips, swaying.

Zuko stole a look at Aang. He seemed transfixed, his eyes wide and glazed, his mouth slightly open. Zuko felt his face heat up. Of course this is what Aang likes. Women, and all the sensuality that comes with them. Did Katara ever dress up and dance like this for Aang? Zuko couldn’t picture it—at least, not without getting angry. Angrier. He took another sip of beer and tried to pay attention to the dancer.

She was taking the lilies out of her updo and throwing each one to a different man in the crowd. Sokka caught one, and twirled it between his fingers as he watched her pull the pins from her hair, letting it fall down her back like a black veil. She smiled, then fluttered her fan in front of her chest as she deftly reached behind her back and unclasped the bra, letting it fall. Many of the guys cheered, Sokka included, as she continued to flutter the fan, teasing but not quite revealing. 

Eventually, she snapped it shut, revealing her breasts to more cheers. Aang hadn’t cheered, but he was gripping the arms of his chair tightly. The woman's breasts were bigger than Zuko’s usual preference, but they looked good on her hourglass figure, and the way they swayed slightly separate from the rest of her body while she danced made him a little hard.

She ran the tip of the closed fan between them, then over, under, and all around, brushing against her nipples. Finally, she slid the fan down her waist and into the band of her underwear, pulling it down slightly. 

“Fuck yeah,” said Sokka, taking a large sip of whiskey. 

She reached her thumb into the waistband and shimmied the satin briefs down slowly. When they were down by her hips she flicked the fan open, holding it upside down to cover herself. A few guys booed, and she smiled deviously, dropping the underwear down her legs.

She kicked them off and started walking down the aisle of the stage, waving the fan slowly. First she walked down the side of the aisle across from them, and as she walked by Zuko got an eyeful of her full but tight ass, his arousal growing stronger. He shifted in his seat, adjusting his robes. Aang seemed to notice, turning his head slightly in Zuko’s direction before returning his attention to the dancer. For reasons he didn’t want to parse, this made Zuko’s dick wilt.

She rounded the corner at the end of the aisle and made her way up their side, still waving her fan with maddening languidness. As she walked by, every man craned his neck to try to see behind the fan, including Sokka, and much to Zuko’s surprise and chagrin, Aang. Zuko didn’t try, but he thought he caught a glimpse of something dark and secret as she passed them.

Zuko wondered what it would be like to fuck a girl like that. Someone overtly sexual, with the kind of body men drooled over. It would be nice, certainly, but he found it hard to get excited over the mere fantasy. 

He finally stole look at Aang’s crotch, and saw an inconspicuous but definite bulge beneath his robe. He tried to imagine Aang fucking her. The image was both upsetting and exciting, and he forced it out of his mind.

The dancer stood in the middle of the stage, and finally, slowly, closed the fan. The crowd went wild when they saw her neatly trimmed pussy, her legs apart in a stance, relishing the attention of the crowd. At this point, a fabric box was being pushed around the stage by a cute girl in a black dress, and men were throwing money into it. The dancer on stage rain her hands all over her body, making eye contact and smirking at the men in the room. Sokka threw a sizable amount of money into the box, and Aang threw in several yuan as well. Not wanting to look like a poor sport, so did Zuko.

Zuko sipped his beer slowly as the rest of the dancers took their turn on stage, each one with a different style and brand of sexuality. Sokka seemed to fully appreciate each one, cheering loudly. Aang was quieter, but clearly riveted, and Zuko found it hard to concentrate on the girls as he mulled over the implications of this. Aang was straight, or just a nymphomaniac—he didn’t think about Zuko that way anymore, after he’d gotten what he wanted. Over the last year and a half, it seemed like Aang had forgotten all about what had transpired between them. There were a few moments—a look that lasted slightly longer than usual, an endeared laugh—that made Zuko think something was there. It was clearly all in his head. 

The glass of beer had been in his hand for so long; the next sip was lukewarm and put a bad taste in his mouth. He set it down.

Sokka knocked his hand against Zuko’s shoulder. “That’s the one.”

“Huh?” said Zuko, as Aang turned to see what they were talking about. 

“That’s the one I want a dance from.” He nodded towards the corner of the room. A voluptuous woman in a leather bodice who had finished her show several minutes before was lounging on a tall stool, smoking a cigarette through a long black reed. She wore a gauzy black dressing gown and black lipstick.

“So?” said Zuko. “Get one, then?”

“Dude!” said Sokka, looking pained. “Can you please _pretend_ like you’re celebrating my bachelor party?”

Zuko glanced at Aang, who shrugged. Zuko sighed, then walked over to the woman and asked her to take Sokka for a dance. He pulled a generous amount of coins from his satchel and tried to hand them to her, but she insisted he drop them into the small velvet purse sitting in her lap, right over her crotch. He withheld a groan and did so, slowly so as not to be rude. She curved her black lips into a smile and reached out a black-gloved hand, silently asking to be led to Sokka.

He led her with as little enthusiasm as possible to the table. Sokka grinned in his cheesy wolf-like manner. The girl tapped her cigarette into the ashtray on their table, then grabbed Sokka by his collar and led him away. He didn’t spare Zuko or Aang a parting glance. 

Zuko resumed his seat and crossed his arms. A thin woman with cropped brown hair was doing some sort of fire bending act with poi spinners as she simultaneously removed her clothes. It was actually sort of impressive, if not very sexy to him personally. Aang seemed entertained, the reflection of the fire dancing in his big gray eyes. 

After a few minutes, she extinguished the fires and bowed. Aang actually cheered, clapping enthusiastically. He stopped when he realized Zuko hadn’t even uncrossed his arms.

Aang hit Zuko’s knee lightly with the back of his hand. “What’s wrong? I know you don’t like strip clubs, but you’ve been particularly grumpy tonight.”

Zuko scoffed. He wasn’t very tipsy anymore, but the combination of drinks was curdling in his stomach, making his head ache. He couldn’t tolerate Aang’s naïveté anymore. 

“Are you serious?” Zuko sneered. “Being back in Ba Sing Se doesn’t jog your memory at all?”

Aang reared his head back, looking stricken. Zuko picked up his lukewarm beer, taking a sip that tasted like piss, just for something to do. 

“That—of course I remember that.”

Zuko glared at him and took another sip.

Aang exhaled, exasperated. “I just—“ he struggled. “I just don’t understand why that’s a bad thing. You don’t want to remember it?”

Zuko gaped at him. “Are you kidding me? _I'm_ the one who doesn’t want to remember? You… for fuck’s sake, didn’t you ever wonder why Mai and I broke up?”

Aang’s eyes grew wide. “You _told_ her?!” he hissed.

“No! I just felt—“ Suddenly, Sokka was sinking into the seat next to him, looking thoroughly disheveled. Zuko stopped talking, turning away from Aang. 

“Woo,” said Sokka feebly, panting. His hair was sticking out of his wolf tail in several directions. “Oh man.”

“Have fun?” asked Zuko, trying his best not to scowl.

“Yeah,” Sokka panted, closing his eyes. He ran a hand over his face. “Fuck. What time is it?”

Zuko pulled out his pocket watch. “A little after midnight.” 

“Are you guys getting dances?”

“No,” said Zuko and Aang at the same time, Zuko more vehemently. 

Sokka looked at them guiltily for a few seconds. “Would you be opposed to heading back to Republic City? I’m a little, uh. Worn out.”

“Fuck no, I would not be opposed,” said Zuko.

“No way,” said Aang. “Let’s go.”

They took a carriage to the outer ring, where Appa was being housed in an animal sanctuary. During the entire ride, Aang kept trying to catch his eye to share a sympathetic look. After the first of these, Zuko pretended that he didn’t notice, grateful for the dark. 

Though Aang and Zuko both had houses in Republic City, they were staying the night at the Four Elements Hotel, where the majority of the wedding party and guests were staying. The wedding service would be held in the hotel’s chapel, the reception in its ballroom.

Once on Appa’s back, Zuko feigned exhaustion as an excuse not to talk. Sokka talked at length about his lap dance, which sounded to Zuko like a brief bit of expensive and unsatisfying dry humping, but seemed to have shaken Sokka with a vague sense of guilt. Aang gave one word responses, and Sokka’s voice slowed until it was replaced by snoring, Aang’s joining him shortly after. Zuko managed to sleep himself, fitfully and in short bursts. After some time, they arrived at the hotel, where the night valet was waiting to take Appa to the stables. Aang hugged Appa’s leg fiercely before allowing him to be led away.

Zuko, Aang, and Sokka had rooms on the same floor, on the opposite end of the hall from the girls. They walked Sokka to his room first.

“Was tonight everything you hoped?” Aang asked. 

“Well,” Sokka considered. “It definitely made me feel relieved to be getting married. So there’s that.”

“Well, I guess that’s the best you can hope for.” Aang clapped him on the back. 

Zuko pulled Sokka into a hug, sparing him a small smile, knowing they'd been scarce tonight. “I’m really happy for you.”

Sokka grinned. “Thanks, guys. I love you both like you’re my own blood. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to pass the fuck out.”

After they had closed the door on Sokka, they walked to the next room, which was Zuko’s. He unlocked the door, starting to push it open. 

“Zuko,” said Aang. Zuko turned around.

Aang was staring at him with grave sincerity. “Zuko, I really want to—”

“It’s fine,” Zuko interrupted. Aang’s face fell. Zuko forced a smile. “Seriously, I was just in a bad mood. You know how I get. Let’s just be happy for Sokka and Suki. This is going to be a really good wedding.”

Aang stared at him. 

“Alright, well—goodnight,” Zuko said, pushing his door all the way open and walking inside. He closed it gently enough so that he wasn’t necessarily slamming it in Aang’s face, and then flung himself on top of the bed. Fuck Aang, and his apology or spiel or whatever that was going to be. Tomorrow they could go back to pretending Zuko didn’t care, and that would be fine; that would be fantastic. He rolled under the sheets without taking his robes off, and a deep dreamless sleep dragged him under.

He woke up late the next morning, and missed the continental breakfast that was supposed to be the best in town. He didn’t mind too much; he wasn’t feeling very social. He ordered plain black tea and toast to be delivered via room service as he took a quick shower and shaved. He combed his hair into a top knot and fastened a gold, flame-adorned band to it. He looked pretty good, he thought, and wondered if he would meet anyone interesting during his time at the hotel.

He’d tried dating a little since he’d been single, but nothing really stuck, and after some time he decided he’d rather focus on more important things than hooking up. If something real came along, he’d be open to it, but it had been several months since he’d had sex of any kind with another person. 

After eating and finishing his coffee, Zuko figured his absence was starting to get conspicuous, so he pulled his robes on and went to the courtyard where the reception would be held. It had been a mild winter for this part of the world, but Zuko was used to the temperate, humid winters in the Fire Nation, and was grateful he’d finished his tea while it was still hot.

Toph noticed him first, as soon as his feet hit the stone pavement she was standing on. “Sparky!” she ran over and hugged him tight, Katara and Aang following closely behind.

“Hey, Bandit,” he said, returning the hug just as tight. He was so happy to have a bitter ally during a time like this, even if she didn’t realize it. He hugged Katara lightly, and patted Aang’s back, not quite hugging him. 

“Wow,” he said, as he took in the courtyard. Large cherry blossom trees bordered the edges, hung with delicate blue lights that twinkled in such a way that made them look like dripping water. White tables spanned the area, and toward the far end there was a long, rectangular table for the wedding party. A man on a tall latter was hanging paper lanterns from the lattice ceiling, where the high midday sun shone through, casting everything in lined shadows that moved as the lanterns swayed softly in the breeze.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” said Katara. “We were just going over the seating arrangements.”

“Oh,” said Zuko. “Did you need my help with that?”

“No, no, I think we’ve got it all covered,” she said, double checking the list she was grasping. ‘Actually, pretty much everything is covered for now. We don’t need to deal with the florists or caterers until tomorrow.” She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Though there is something you can do.”

“Sure,” said Zuko. “What is it?”

“Check with the kitchens and make sure they have seaweed schnapps. It’s Gran Gran’s favorite. They said they have a full bar, but it’s a little obscure and I just want to check so that they have time to get some if not.”

“Okay,” said Zuko, feeling like he was given a task just for the sake of being included. “Anything else?”

“Nope! Take Toph with you, if you want.” She walked away to go talk to some Water Tribe girls who were watching the lights with interest, Aang trailing her. 

Zuko turned to Toph. “Do you appreciate being loaned out like an inanimate object?”

She punched him in the arm. “Katara is going crazy, and it’s not even her wedding. I can’t imagine what she’ll be like when it is.”

Zuko scowled. 

“But yeah, I’m down to go to the kitchens with you. Survey the liquor supply. Sample a few things.” She smiled at Zuko mischievously. 

“Honestly, me too.”

After confirming that the kitchen was already stocked with two different brands of seaweed schnapps, Zuko and Toph found themselves sipping martinis at the ritzy bar in the hotel lobby. 

“So, I heard you girls saw some strippers last night.” Zuko grinned.

“I didn’t _see_ anything, dick.”

“Well…”

“I got a lap dance though.” She smirked and took a sip. 

“How was that?”

Toph snorted. “Inspiring. Did you?”

“See strippers? Yes. Get a lap dance? No.”

“Couldn’t afford it?”

Zuko laughed. “Not my thing.”

“Well, it’s not like its ‘my _thing_ either! Just, ya know, when in Ba Sing Se…”

“Eh, I like my women real.” 

Toph rolled her eyes. “Well, maybe you’ll meet a real one at the wedding.”

“Maybe. Looking forward to seeing anyone in particular?” he asked, and was shocked when Toph blushed. 

“Just one of my old friends,” she said casually, sipping her martini. 

“Old friend or old flame?” 

“Ugh.” Toph rolled her eyes. “Not really. But I like him.”

Zuko was about to ask who, but Hakoda, his wife Malina, and Bato had just walked into the bar and were walking toward them, smiling. 

Over the course of the day, Zuko met so many people he couldn’t keep track of their names. All the Water Tribe names sounded alike to him. He wished his mother would have come—Sokka had invited her, along with Zuko’s stepfather and half-sister—but after her years in exile she didn’t quite feel like attending such a high profile event. Zuko could relate to this on a personal level, but he liked being part of high society again most of the time.

He barely saw Aang and Katara all day, spending most of his time with Toph as they socialized. He figured they were with Sokka and Suki, preparing them for the big day. Zuko supposed that made Aang and Katara the more important members of the wedding party, and was privately grateful. 

On the morning of the wedding, he joined Aang in Sokka’s room, where Sokka was putting on his ceremonial warrior outfit. Hakoda and Bato were there, and Bato held the wolf helmet as Hakoda straightened the shoulders of Sokka’s vest. 

Sokka gave Zuko a shaky smile as he walked in. 

“Ready?” Zuko asked. 

“Yeah. Just a little nervous. There are a _lot_ of people here.”

“Need a drink to ease your nerves?” asked Bato, pulling a flask partway out of his pocket.

“Nah, thanks,” said Sokka. “I’ll wait ’til the reception.”

Hakoda used white warpaint to draw two lines under each of Sokka’s eyes, and then Bato placed the helmet on his head. 

Zuko and Aang were already dressed in formal blue Water Tribe outfits. It was Zuko’s first time wearing anything like it. and he felt strange. Aang looked out of place too, the bright sky blue of his arrow clashing with the deep lagoon shade of his overcoat. 

“Ready?” Sokka sighed. 

“If you are, then we are,” said Aang. 

They walked to the hotel’s chapel area. Hakoda and Bato took Sokka to see the minister. Zuko and Aang were going to meet up with the girls and Suki’s dad to walk down the aisle. Zuko followed Aang to a room in the back of the chapel area.

The door was closed, and a flurry of unintelligible voices could be heard behind it. Aang knocked on the door.

After a few seconds, Katara opened it. She was wearing a blue dress, much fancier than the ones she usually wore, her long hair in an updo and her face made up. 

“Wow,” said Aang. He kissed her. “You look great.”

“So do you!” she said, beaming. “Come in, you guys.”

They walked into the small room. Toph was dressed in the same outfit as Katara, with the same hairstyle and makeup. She looked just as pretty, too, which shocked Zuko. He’d never seen her all dolled up before. 

Suki was sitting at a large vanity, talking to her parents. Her mom was fussing with her headdress, and her dad was leaning against the wall. Her dress seemed to be exactly like her warrior outfit, but white. Her headdress was similar to the bronze one she usually wore, but silver and more delicate. The blue betrothal necklace looked brilliant against her white collar as she smiled at them in the mirror.

They hugged her, and she introduced them to her parents, Takeshi and Hotaru. Suki always looked pretty, but today she was stunning, her chin length brown hair in waves, her eyes shining. Her parents were beaming, and Zuko was happy, so happy, that everything was going perfectly for the young couple. Despite everything they’d been through, it was all going to be alright. 

He and Toph were first down the aisle, and everyone oohed and ahhed as they passed. Toph barely concealed her smirk, clearly uncomfortable and amused by all the attention. The rows of white chairs were filled with people, and pillars of ice stood by each row, bathed in soft light from the paper lanterns. There were seats off to the side of the main podium where Ty Lee and the other Kiyoshi warriors sat, stoic-faced. 

Sokka stood at the end of the aisle. For some reason, Zuko had expected him to look nervous, but he didn’t. He looked calm, composed, and confident—he looked, somehow, like a man.

Once they reached him, Zuko went and stood next to him, leaving an Aang-sized gap between them. He grinned at Sokka, who smirked, his blue eyes shining. Toph stood on the far end of the podium, holding her pink flowers, looking beautiful and lonely. Zuko’s heart twinged for her a little, because if what Aang had told him was true, Zuko could relate to how she was feeling. 

This sympathy did him no favors as Aang and Katara made their way down the aisle, so he stuffed it down deep. They garnered their own gasps and praise from the crown, and in what felt like a second Aang was standing between Zuko and Sokka. Katara took her place next to Toph, and suddenly Toph didn’t seem so lonely, which made Zuko smile.

He was still thinking about Toph when a trumpet rang out, and redidected his attention to the end of the aisle. Suki had her arm through Takeshi’s, holding her blue and white bouquet in the other hand. She was smiling hard.

Zuko stole a look at Sokka, and noticed Aang was doing the same. Sokka was actually crying. His wolf hood concealed it from most of the crowd, and he smiled even as his eyes glazed over. Something about it made Zuko uncomfortable, as if he was witnessing a private thing, but Sokka didn’t seem ashamed. 

When Suki reached the front, the minister, dressed in gray nondenominational formal wear, said some words before Suki’s father placed her hand in Sokka’s and sat down in the front row. Suki beamed up at Sokka. A drumbeat started, and then the Kiyoshi warriors rose from where they were seated and opened their fans in unison. They did an intricate, slightly terrifying dance, ending in a salute towards the couple. They held this position for several seconds, as still as statues. Suki and Sokka bowed, and the warriors resumed their seats. 

As the minister resumed speaking, Zuko found his attention drifting toward the guests. He searched the sea of green and blue clothing for some red, hoping to spot his Uncle. With the lamps shining on the wedding party and not much else, it was hard for him to distinguish anyone.

From what Zuko understood, the vows were a fusion of traditional Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom wedding vows. They sounded boring to Zuko, but he supposed the Fire Nation’s were as well. 

After a short while, the minister addressed Sokka. “Do you take this woman to be your wife?”

“I do,” he said, more quietly than he usually spoke. 

“Do you take this man to be your husband?”

“I do,” said Suki, her own eyes shining. 

“You may now kiss.”

Sokka lifted Suki up and spun her in a circle. Katara took several steps back, knocking into Toph. Sokka set Suki back on her feet and kissed her hard as she clung onto his shoulders for balance. 

Zuko clapped as the crowd cheered, relieved that Sokka was acting Sokka-like again.

The reception hall looked ethereal with all the decorations finished; in addition to the lights and cherry trees there were waterfalls and ice sculptures maintained by a team of waterbenders. Zuko sat between Suki and Toph at the long table, where they were served a delicious turkey-duck dinner and champagne. After toasting to the newlyweds, both Zuko and Toph drained their glasses immediately. 

A small orchestra performed a variety of songs. Katara told Zuko and Toph that they were a variety of Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom wedding songs, but Zuko couldn’t tell which was which. 

Sokka and Suki had their first dance, and people slowly begin to pair off and join them on the dance floor.

Zuko considered asking Toph to dance, but he didn’t really enjoy dancing and wasn’t sure that she did either. 

Instead, he said, “Can I grab you a drink from the bar?”

“Hmm,” Toph considered. “Okay. Can you get me something with whiskey in it? One of those girly things?”

“Uh, I don’t think girly drinks have whiskey in them.”

She blushed. “Oh.”

“Actually,” Zuko said quickly. “Yes, I know what you mean.” He bowed and then hurried to the bar. 

It was on his way that he finally saw the rotund red-robed figure he’d been searching for.

“Uncle!”

Iroh turned around, his eyes brightening. “Nephew!”

They embraced. They saw each other fairly regularly, but it was always a delight.

“I think blue is your color!”

Zuko grinned. “On your way to the bar?” 

“Ah, yes,” said Iroh. “Champagne is nice, but whiskey makes me frisky!” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Oh no,” said Zuko, laughing despite himself. “No friskiness for you tonight.” 

“But look at all these beautiful women!” Iroh made a sweeping gesture, and Zuko looked. And that’s when he spotted another familiar red-robed figure. 

Mai.

Zuko turned around quickly, flushing. “Mai’s here!” he whispered frantically.

Iroh looked over at Mai, arching an eyebrow. “Well, yes, of course! You didn’t know?”

“Uh-uh,” said Zuko. He stole another look at Mai. She wasn’t looking his way; either she didn’t see him there or was pretending not to. 

Iroh grabbed hold of Zuko’s shoulder and gently steered him toward the bar. “Life tests us this way sometimes. We must learn to walk through the fire. Come, let’s get you a drink.” 

“I also need one for Toph,” Zuko mumbled.

“Toph?” said Iroh, surprised. “She is much too young!”

Zuko scoffed. “I drank when I was her age.”

“I meant for you!”

Zuko scowled and opened his mouth to protest when Iroh started laughing, clutching his stomach.

“Only joking, nephew.”

“Very funny.” About a year and a half ago, when Zuko found out that Aang and Katara were back together, he had run to the Jasmine Dragon to be comforted by his uncle. He hadn’t told him who he was heartbroken over, just that it wasn’t Mai. Iroh didn’t pry, and Zuko was pretty sure he didn’t try to guess. But sometimes he made comments that made Zuko feel, however illogically, that Iroh _knew._

As Zuko asked the bartender for a whiskey sour for Toph, Iroh got them two neat fire whiskeys.

He knocked his glass against Zuko’s. “To new beginnings.”

Zuko took a sip.

He carried the drinks back to the table, but no one was sitting there. He looked at the dance floor, which was packed now. Aang was dancing with Katara. They were both amazing dancers, Zuko noticed hatefully. Sokka and Suki were laughing, dancing with their arms flailing everywhere. 

Zuko spotted Toph, who was dancing rather sexily with the Duke, reaching up to touch his hat. Zuko realized that was who she had been talking about earlier. He smiled, and put her drink down on the table. Who was he kidding? He and Toph had never been ‘dates,’ and that was just as well. 

Hakoda and Malina were doing some kind of Water Tribe dance, or maybe it was just an old people thing. Ty Lee, still in her Kiyoshi makeup, was trying to teach Haru how to dance. Behind them, Zuko saw Iroh talking to an older woman, who was blushing. 

He sighed and sat back down at the table. He drained his cup, then started on the whiskey sour, which was just the right balance of whiskey and sour.

After a few minutes of watching the crowd, Zuko noticed a shadow fall over him. “Hey.”

He looked up, and into Mai’s pale face.

“Oh. Hey.”

She sat down in Toph’s chair, setting two drinks on the table.

“What’re those?” he asked.

“I’m not sure. Some people went to dance as soon as they brought them to their table, so I stole them.”

Zuko snorted. 

Mai picked one up and held it to him. “Cheers.”

He picked the other one up and hit it against hers, and they both drank. It was something with rum in it, not Zuko’s usual choice but pretty good nonetheless.

After a moment of comfortable silence, Ty Lee danced over to them. Zuko noticed Haru heading to the bar.

“Hey guys!” she said brightly

“Who’s that?” said Mai, pointing at Haru’s retreating figure.

“I have no idea, but isn’t he cute?” she squealed.

“You think everyone’s cute,” said Man distastefully, sipping her drink. “But actually, yes.”

“That’s Haru,” said Zuko. “We stayed together at the Air Temple—you know, before I infiltrated Boiling Rock.” He gave Mai a small smile, remembering how she saved him from his sister.

She didn’t smile back, but her eyes softened. “Oh right—his father was one of the, uh, imprisoned—”

“Yeah,” said Zuko.

Ty Lee put her hands over her mouth. “Was his father okay?”

“Oh yeah, he was fine. His parents are over there.” He pointed to the dance floor, where gigantic Tyro was dancing with his tiny wife.

“Oh, whew,” she smiled. She gasped, her eyes going wide. “I forgot to tell him—uh, Haru—no cherries! I _hate_ cherries!” She turned and started heading toward the bar, so fast she was almost skipping. 

“Oh god,” Mai laughed. 

Zuko shook his head. “I could never understand how you two are best friends.”

“Ugh, I know. But she completes me,” Mai deadpanned. She smiled slightly. “She invited me here; I’m sure you were wondering who did.”

“No, I—well, yeah, I was,” Zuko admitted sheepishly. “But, that’s great.”

“Yeah, I guess Suki gave all the Kiyoshis a plus-one option, and she picked me.” Zuko could tell she was way more touched by this then her tone suggested. 

“I’m just surprised to see you, because, well—I heard you’ve been gone. Traveling and stuff.”

She cracked a smile, teeth and all. “I have been. I still am, actually, but I thought I was due for a visit. This city is—well. It’s definitely not the worst place I’ve been to, I can tell you that.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” said Zuko, smiling in spite of himself. “So tell me about some of these places.”

She told him, sounding unimpressed at first, but as she spoke Zuko could tell that she’d been truly affected by her experiences. He watched her eyes light up and her cheeks flush as she told him about meeting air acolytes in the western temple, and going to a festival on Whale Tale Island. She seemed so unlike the bitter girl he broke up with a year and a half ago—but then again, she wasn’t always that way. That’s what he loved about her cold exterior—he was the only one who got to see the fire within. 

Mai noticed the way he was looking at her and abruptly stopped talking. She smirked and narrowed her eyes at him.

Zuko opened his mouth to speak, but she interrupted. 

“If you think I’m going to dance with you, you’re out of your mind.”

He smiled, taken aback. “I would never presume to think that.”

“Good,” she said smugly, taking another sip.

Zuko noticed she was running low. 

“Let me get you another drink.”


	4. The Promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko just wants to do the honorable thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter than usual! The next chapter will be a big one :)

A YEAR AND A HALF LATER

It was late on a Wednesday morning, and Zuko was still in bed, lazily stroking Mai’s hair as she slept. He loved it when her hair was down like this, fanning over his chest like a black curtain. He kissed her head, and she moaned fretfully.

“I gotta get up, babe,” he said very quietly, and wasn’t surprised when she didn’t reply, her breaths returning to their heavy pattern.

He allowed her to sleep for a few more minutes, then rolled her off of his chest, kissing her lips. Her eyes fluttered open, and though her eyebrows knitted together, she allowed him to kiss her.

“I have to get up,” he said again.

“Mm?” 

“The meeting. Remember?”

“Mm.”

“Are you going to get up?”

She pinched her eyes shut and moaned, rolling away from him. “No.”

“Okay.” She usually left when he did, but she was welcome to stay as long as she wanted, as he often reminded her. He got dressed, then kissed her again. She returned it sleepily.

He left and headed to the palace’s meeting room. It was just to go over some laws that were proposed to be abolished, nothing too exciting. He wished he could stay in bed with Mai all day, with Kato bringing them food.

Negotiations took longer than he expected, and he was tired and grumpy by the time it was over. He walked back to his bedchamber, eager to take a hot bath and unwind. 

He pushed the door open. Mai was still in his bed, laying with her back to the door.

“Babe?” he said.

She turned around, looking miserable. “Hey.”

He rushed over to her. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t feel well.”

He felt her forehead. It was a little warm from the pillow, but not hot. “In what way?”

“I don’t know, just—bad. All achy and tired.” Her eyes were puffy.

“I’ll call the doctor.”

“No—” she grabbed his hand and held it. “Don’t. I wanna go home.”

“Are you sure? I can—”

“Yeah, I just want to sleep it off,” she mumbled. She got up and begin getting dressed slowly.

“Do you need help?”

She looked at him. “What, with getting dressed?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“No.” She fastened the buttons on her dress and then stood. She seemed steady on her feet, just exhausted, but Zuko walked her all the way out to the carriages. 

“Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?” He said, sticking his head through the carriage he had just helped her into.

“Zuko, I’ll be right over there.” She pointed to her house in the near distance. “If I need you, I’ll send a messenger.”

“Okay,” said Zuko, defeated. He kissed her, and then stepped aside to let the carriage go. 

By noon the next day he still hadn’t heard from Mai. Usually she came over for lunch, unless otherwise specified. Since he had no meetings for the day, he decided to head to her manor on foot.

Her doorman, Haruto, let him in. After confirming with him that Mai hadn’t left, Zuko made his way down the long corridor to her bedchamber. 

Her parents and ten-year-old brother had moved to one of the Fire Nation colonies that hadn’t been assimilated into the Republic of Nations, but they still owned the house. Mai sometimes visited them, but they hadn’t returned to the Fire Nation in a long time. 

Zuko’s footsteps echoed loudly in the empty corridor.

He knocked on Mai’s bedroom door, and waited several long moments before he heard a reply.

“Who is it?”

“It’s me.”

Another long pause.

“Come in.”

He pushed the heavy ebony door open and stepped inside. She was sitting up in bed, a burgundy blanket pulled up to her waist. Pillows were stacked high behind her, and her eyes looked half-open.

“Fuck, Mai, you look like death.”

She opened her eyes just enough to narrow them at him. “Wow. I love you, too.”

“I didn’t mean—I just—” he sat on the bed and grabbed her hand, which was slightly damp. “I’m just really concerned.”

She squeezed his hand. “I’m _fine_. I’m just super tired and all sore. I probably just have a cold or something.”

He felt her forehead, which was damp like her hands.

“Do you need anything?”

“No,” she said. “I just want to sleep.”

By the time he had tucked her in and left the manor, Zuko was resolved to call for his doctor.

Dr. Kenta had been the royal doctor for years, and had shown Zuko no ill will when he took the throne. He was the best doctor in the Fire Nation, or at least had been when Ozai hired him, and saved Suki’s life when she had dragon pox.

Kenta agreed to go to Mai’s house and check her condition. 

With that taken care of, Zuko was free to enjoy his day. He read part of a book on the ancient practice of dragon fighting that Suki had given him for his twenty-third birthday, and ate lobster in the royal dining room. It was a hot day, so he stayed indoors, restless but comfortable. 

Early evening came, but the sunlight still streamed through Zuko’s windows, turning from white to orange. He was sitting in his living room, reading a couple of news reports, when the big bell in front of the door began to chime.

A few seconds later, he heard the murmured exchange of pleasantries as Kato answered the door. Zuko recognized Dr. Kenta’s voice, and folded his newspaper. 

Kato brought the doctor into the living room, and Zuko stood. Kenta bowed, and Zuko returned it, gesturing to an armchair. “Please, have a seat.”

Kenta sat, and Zuko sat across from him. 

“How’s she doing?”

Kenta didn’t reply right away, fixing Zuko with an inscrutable stare from behind his small, circular glasses.

“Fire Lord. I don’t believe it is in your best interest to hear this from me. However, that is the wish of my patient.”

Zuko opened his mouth to ask what Kenta was talking about, but the words died in his throat. He felt the blood drain from his face. “What,” was all he managed.

“I don’t mean to scare you,” said Kenta, taking his glasses off and tucking them into the front pocket of his doctor’s coat. “She seems to be perfectly healthy.”

“I—” Zuko shook his head. “I don’t understand.”

Kenta sighed. “Prince Zuko—oh. My apologies, Fire Lord Zuko, it’s just that I’ve known you since you were a boy.” He cleared his throat. “Mai is pregnant.”

There was empathy in that steely gaze as Zuko felt the blood rush back into his face until it was on fire.

“I see,” he managed to say.

“I—would congratulate you, Fire Lord, but—I don’t wish to be presumptuous.”

“I—well—thank you, Dr. Kenta. For everything. Just—how is she doing?”

Kenta sighed again, leaning back in the armchair. “Like I said, she seems perfectly healthy for carrying a child. But she’s not doing well.”

“Is she upset?”

“When I told her, she was very angry. She ordered me to leave. I convinced her to let me stay and give her an exam, but she didn’t speak to me or seem to listen to what I was saying. I asked her if she would like to tell you herself.” He looked Zuko in the eye. “She said that she would not, and when I offered to do it, she gave me her permission.”

Zuko let out the breath he’d been holding. “I’m sorry if she was cruel to you.”

Kenta smiled sadly. “Fire Lord, it’s my responsibility to deliver certain kinds of news. Please understand that Mai will be receiving the same care afforded to the Fire Nation’s royal family. I hope that in time we can develop an amicable relationship, but either way, her care will remain of the highest caliber.”

Zuko bowed his head slightly. “Thank you.”

“Please let me know if there are any arrangements that can be made to ease this transition. The heir to your Lordship is my top priority.”

After walking Kenta out, Zuko sat on the ornate wooden bench in the foyer. He tipped his head back until it touched the wall, and closed his eyes. 

After an undeterminable amount of time, he sat up and sighed. He put his shoes on, and went out the door, smiling shakily at Kato, who was in his office by the door.

It was early evening, and the heat was starting to wane. Zuko scooped up a few panda lilies from the garden in front of the palace. He didn’t really know what he was doing, but it felt right. The walk to Mai’s was just long enough for him to think about a few things. Perversely, he was glad that it was summer—he didn’t want to repeat Ozai’s eugenics project, even by accident. 

When he got to Mai’s room, he knocked. 

“What?” she practically screamed.

“It’s me!”

After several seconds of waiting for a reply, he pushed the door open. 

Mai was in bed, rolled away from him. He walked to the bed and sat in it, abandoning the lilies on her bedside table. He put his hand on her shoulder and looked down at her. Her face was partially hidden in her pillow, and though her eyes were open she didn’t seem to be looking at anything. 

“Mai,” he said. 

“No.”

“What?"

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Everything is going to be okay, baby.”

She didn’t respond. 

“I know it’s not what we planned, but I’m not—“

“It’s not the same,” she croaked, her voice ragged. “You don’t have to— _incubate_ it.”

Zuko bit his lip, feeling like he’d been doused by water. After a few seconds, he said, “I know. I’m sorry.”

She sighed. “We should have been more careful.”

They sat together in silence for a few minutes. Zuko began to stroke her hair.

“Please stop,” she muttered, and he did. 

“How are you feeling?” he asked after another minute.

“Tired. Sick. Not, like, vomit sick. Just—bad.”

Zuko thought maybe he could relate. He slid down behind her, kissing the back of her neck.

“What are you doing?”

“I thought I could hold you while you slept,” he said.

“Oh.” She pulled out of his grasp and turned around, finally looking him in the eyes. She kissed him. “I’m sorry. I just want to be alone.”

Zuko’s heart ached. “Why, babe?”

“I’m just—I’m all sore, and I’ll sleep better if I’m alone.” She kissed him again, apologetically. “I just need to not think for a while.”

“Okay,” he said, though he was internally raging against the idea of leaving her side. “If that’s what you want.”

“It is,” she said, he eyes already sliding shut. 

“Can I send Haruto in with anything for you?”

“Uh-uh,” she mumbled.

He sat there staring at her for a few more seconds, noticing the shadows her eyelashes left on her pale cheeks, the way her mouth dropped slightly open. Then she opened her eyes slightly and saw him there, and her face drew into an unhappy pinch.

“Zuko, please!”

He kissed her forehead and then left the room, closing the door gently even though he kind of wanted to slam it. He didn’t want to leave her alone, but he didn’t want to be alone either.

Over the next few days, Zuko was quickly turned away each time he visited Mai. He was starting to lose hope that she would come around to the idea of having his child. What was so difficult for her? She knew that the Fire Lord needed an heir, and she had chosen to be with him.

After the third day, Zuko found himself pacing the royal garden, watching the turtle ducks without really seeing them. 

After Sokka’s wedding, Mai had decided to stay in Republic City for a few days so that Zuko and Ty Lee could show her around. Days turned into a week, and these outings turned into just the two of them as Ty Lee became busy with other obligations. By the time he needed to return to Caldera, Mai had decided to join him, visiting home for the first time since she left. As the weeks dragged on, Zuko realized she wasn’t going anywhere, and he was so relieved.

Zuko sighed, kneeling by the pond. He pulled a stale loaf of bread out of his pocket and tore off a piece, tossing it into the water. A turtle duck swam up to eat it, another racing to get to it first.

When he first got back together with Mai, he couldn’t believe he had been so stupid as to dump her for that boy who didn’t even love him. She may not be perfect, but she was perfect for him. This go-around seemed different than before—they didn’t fight as much; he felt respected and less selfish. It wasn’t always exciting, but he never got his heart broken. It felt, for the first time, like a committed, adult relationship. But suddenly, all that was twisted on its head by this unexpected news. 

After the turtle ducks had eaten all of his bread, Zuko walked to a small building to the far left of the garden. It was the palace’s meditation room, and though Zuko promised Iroh he would use it, he never had. Now seemed as good a time as any.

He opened the heavy gilded door and stepped inside. There were no windows, and as he closed the door the room was consumed by blackness. He sparked a flame in his hand to get his bearings, and saw rows of torches lining each side of the wall. He lit them all in two fluid motions. 

A statue of Avatar Roku, placed in the room by Iroh after Ozai was dethroned, stood tall and cold in the dancing light. 

Zuko sat in front of it cross-legged. He looked up into Roku’s stone eyes, feeling a bit silly, and tried to focus his thoughts.

Roku was his great grandfather on his mother’s side, a history that had almost been erased from Zuko by his father. Zuko closed his eyes and bowed his head. How could he be a good father when all he’d ever known was hatred?

Thoughts of Uncle Iroh floated to the surface of his mind. Of course. When Iroh lost his son and Zuko was banished from the Fire Nation, they had each other. In fact, Iroh was all Zuko had. It was something, maybe even something more important, but it wasn’t quite the same.

He looked back up at Roku, who was starting to look more real, less mean, in the fire’s glow. He could see a little of his mother’s features in that face if he squinted just right. Zuko and Azula had more of Ozai’s features, but Kiyi looked just like Ursa.

Zuko smiled. At least Kiyi had grown up well, if not totally normally, with her mother changing her face and name when Kiyi was young. At least she had been loved unconditionally by two people who loved each other. How common was that, really? At eleven years old, she was the most well-adjusted kid he’d ever met.

Ikem was the opposite of Ozai in every way, and he made all the difference in Ursa’s life. Zuko wanted to be as different from Ozai as possible. He wanted to be like Ikem, and Iroh, and everyone who showed him that love was real.

Zuko sat in the meditation room for a few more minutes, knowing it couldn’t be as simple as he was thinking. But maybe it was. Maybe he and Mai were just complicating things, because that’s all they learned how to do growing up with tyrants.

The next day, Zuko went to the upscale shopping plaza a few miles from the palace. There was a jeweler there his mother used to go to, and after some research he was able to find the name of it. He wondered if they were still in business, but had high hopes. When he was a kid they’d been open for several decades.

As it turned out, Mr. Jung was still practicing his craft, and looked nearly the same as he had all those years ago.

“My goodness!” he exclaimed, adjusting his monocle. “Fire Lord Zuko! It is an honor.” He bowed deeply. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Thank you, Mr. Jung,” Zuko said, returning the bow. “I came to you because I remember you were my mother’s favorite jeweler—” Jung bowed again in gratitude—“and because I need something very special. An engagement ring.”

“Aha!” Jung’s monocle threatened to fall as he raised his eyebrows. “For the Noblewoman Mai, as I understand?”

“Yes,” said Zuko. He was used to people knowing details about his personal life, but it was still slightly unsettling. 

“Wonderful, wonderful. Well, let me show you my finest selection of jewels! Only the very best will do.”

Jung unlocked a lacquered ebony cabinet and pulled out a wooden tray. Atop a cushioned panel were several small glass boxes, each containing a different gemstone. He set it on a small table in the center of the room. 

Zuko bent over the table, examining the gems. There were clear, sparkling diamonds, brilliant red sapphires, and even some sort of opaque black material. Obsidian, he guessed. 

“This one is nice,” he said, pointing to a dark red one in the shape of a tear. It was on the larger side, but not obnoxious. 

“Excellent,” said Jung, picking up the small glass box. “Let’s fine the perfect setting for this sapphire.”

“How long does it take to make?”

Jung looked at the stone. “Well, depending on the materials you choose, it should take around four weeks. I’d normally say six, but for you, Fire Lord—”

“Oh,” said Zuko quickly. “I’m sorry—I didn’t realize.” He sighed. “I’m afraid I need it right away. Do you have any that are just—ready to go?”

Jung’s eyes went wide again, and he replaced the glass box in the wooden tray. “Of course, of course!” He put the case back into the cabinet. “It is my fault, I should have reached out to you and made the process known.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” said Zuko. “Improper planning on my part.”

“Not at all!” Jung pulled another tray from the cabinet. This one had rings pushed into slits in the cushioned lining, all glowing red under the bright ceiling lights.

“Since you liked the sapphire gem, here are all of my red sapphire rings. What is the lady’s ring size?”

Zuko hesitated. “I’m sorry—I don’t know.”

Jung smiled sympathetically. “Quite alright, if it doesn’t fit you can bring it back here for a resizing.”

“That—sounds good, thank you.”

Jung consulted the tray. “This teardrop one might be exactly what you’re looking for.”

He plucked a ring out of the tray and held it between his white-gloved fingers. The gem was a similar shape and color to the one he had seen before, but smaller. It was outlined in gold, which was the same color as the ring band, smooth and shining. The ring was small, but not too small—it might even fit her.

“That looks great,” said Zuko. “I’ll take it.”

On the carriage ride to Mai’s, Zuko’s insides were buzzing. He was nervous, but he also felt like he held the key to fixing everything in that tiny black box in his pocket. Soon it was going to be okay. 

Haruto answered Mai’s door. “I’m sorry, Fire Lord. She doesn’t want any company.” He looked nervous, like he had each time he’d said this the past few days.

“Please, I really need to see her.”

“She was very firm on the matter.”

“Please,” Zuko repeated. He pulled the box out of his pocket and held it up.

Hotaru cleared his throat. “Fire Lord, with all due respect, I’m not sure she’s in the proper state of mind for—surprises.” Despite this, he held the door open for Zuko to walk inside.

Zuko knocked on her door. “Mai, it’s me.” He waited several seconds. “Are you in there?”

“Yes.”

“Can I come in?”

He waited even longer, and then opened the door. She was sitting in one of her velvet armchairs, which had been pushed to face the window. Her hair was undone and looked dirty. When she turned to look at him, her eyes were puffy and her face was red. At the sight of him, she put her hands over her face, her shoulders bouncing with silent sobs.

He ran over to her and pulled her into his arms. He sat down on the bed, bringing her with him gently, and held her as her tears soaked the front of his vest.

“I’m sorry,” she choked out.

“It’s okay,” he said, feeling his heart unravel.

“Why is this so hard for me?”

“I don’t know, Mai, but it’s okay.” He smoothed her hair off her face and looked down into her eyes. “All of it is okay. You’re already my family. You have been for a long time.”

Her eyebrows pinched, and she wiped her nose with her sleeve. 

“There’s something I’ve been wanting to ask you for a while, but I couldn’t figure out how, and I’m afraid I waited too long.”

She blinked at him several times. “Wh..what…”

“I love you,” Zuko said. “I’m sorry it’s happening like this, but I can’t wait any longer.” He slid off the bed onto the floor, and kneeled, pulling the box out of his pocket. He opened it. “Will you marry me?”

“Oh my god,” said Mai, clutching her face with both hands. She wasn’t crying anymore but she looked stricken, staring at the ring. Her eyes flicked back to Zuko’s. She shook her head slowly.

“No?” Zuko asked incredulously, laughing sadly. His eyes had started to fill with tears.

“Not… _no_ , I’m just… I just don’t know what to say. I mean, yes, obviously, but I don’t know what else to say.”

“You don’t need to say anything.” He got back on the bed and put his arm around her. “Do you want to put it on?”

She took the box from him, and pulled out the ring. She looked at him furtively before slipping it onto her ring finger. It was a little big.

“We can get it resized,” he said, and that’s when she begin crying again. He put her head on his shoulder and stroked her hair as she wiped her eyes, staring at the ring.

“Are you sure about this?” she said. 

“Sure? Of course, Mai, I love you.”

“I mean…” She sat up straight and looked at him. “Would you be doing this if I wasn’t pregnant?”

“ _Yes_ ,” said Zuko, reaching up to cup her face in his hands. “Yes.” He kissed her. “I wouldn’t be doing it like this, though. I’d plan it out better. But yes, Mai, I’ve always wanted to marry you. I just wasn’t ready. I’m ready now.”

Mai smiled sadly. “I’ve always wanted to marry you, too. And I guess…” she exhaled heavily. “I guess I have to be ready, too. I mean.” She touched her stomach. “I don’t _feel_ ready for any of this, but it’s already happening.” Her lip trembled as her voice shook.

“I promise it’s going to be okay,” he said, gathering her into his arms again. “No matter what, I will take care of you.”

He held her like that for a long time, and eventually she fell asleep in his arms, breathing heavily. He lowered her into the bed. Her face looked so young when she was asleep, her eyebrows pinching with worry. 

He knew it would take a while for her to feel okay about the pregnancy, but at least now he would be there to dry her tears. He kissed her cheek and lay behind her, spooning her body with his. Mai and this baby would have everything he and his mother didn’t. Zuko begin to drift off, feeling at peace for the first time in days. He had the whole world in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KINDA SPOILER ALERT
> 
> If you're wondering what the hell happened to Zukaang, don't worry! Chapter 5 is going to be a ~game changer~
> 
> PS Thank you everyone for your comments and support, I'm so excited to share more and more of this story with you <3


	5. The Beach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ~Angry boiz!~ ~DILFs!~ 
> 
> Also I have a vague idea of how many chapters this thing will be... we are more than halfway there y'all :,(

FIVE YEARS LATER

It wasn’t the first time Zuko had spent the night apart from his family, but it was the first time he was the one who was home while they were gone. Izumi was four now, which meant she’d be starting school next year. Mai was taking her to Ash Island, home of the Royal Fire Academy for Girls, which was Mai, Ty Lee, and Azula’s alma mater. They were staying overnight, and Izumi would be taking her proficiency test in the morning. Zuko had full confidence that she would pass. His daughter was smart, fearless, and talented.

He tried to enjoy his time alone, sitting on the veranda and soaking up some sunshine, but he was bored. They hadn’t even been gone a day, and he already missed Izumi terribly. Since Izumi had been born, Zuko spent less time in Republic City and more time in Caldera, though he still went back and forth.

Luckily, he wouldn’t be alone for long. Aang was coming by to discuss the Dragon Restoration Project. It made more sense for him to come here, since the Fire Nation was the only place where dragon eggs could incubate properly. Zuko had offered to handle the project on his own, but Aang said they had to do it together, since they were together when they discovered that dragons still existed on Sun Warrior Island.

Zuko smiled to himself, thinking of this. Zuko would never understand all the rituals and meanings Aang ascribed to seemingly normal things, but sometimes he was grateful for it. 

He went in and bathed, taking his time. Afterwards, he got dressed and did his hair, which was long now, past his shoulders. He put the top half up and secured it with his gold flame pin. After he finished, there was still almost an hour until Aang was set to arrive.

After Zuko begin dating Mai again, his friendship with Aang had slowly returned—not quite to normal, but it was a solid partnership nonetheless. Zuko could be in the same room as him without thinking about that night. In fact, he rarely ever thought about it any more. It was a fluke, a mistake—it didn’t matter. Still, they’d never be as close as they were beforehand, and Zuko had learned to accept it.

Luckily, over the years Aang had become as punctual as Zuko, and arrived right at six. Zuko heard Appa land in the back courtyard, and walked onto to the veranda again.

Aang had dismounted, and was brushing white fur off his robes onto the cobblestone. He begin waving when he saw Zuko.

Zuko grinned and lifted his arm. 

Aang used a gust of air to propel himself to the outside of the iron gate that bordered the veranda. He grabbed it and then climbed over, one leg at a time, until he was next to Zuko.

“Hey,” Aang said.

“Too good to use the door?”

Aang smiled. “It’s nice to see you, too.”

Zuko felt as if the meeting room was too formal for the occasion, so he invited Aang into the living room, where Kato brought them tea. Aang blew on his teacup. He had grown an interesting beard several months ago. Sokka made fun of it, but Katara defended Aang, saying it was sexy. Zuko thought it looked good too, but outwardly kept neutral on the matter. 

“Dinner is being made,” Zuko said. “I was thinking we should talk business now, and catch up on personal matters over some agedashi tofu?”

Aang smiled. “Sure.”

There were only a few living dragons left, and they weren’t laying very many eggs. Aang had read that the Sun Warriors had an ancient way of breeding dragons, and wanted Zuko to go with him tomorrow to the island to offer financial assistance to breed and raise the eggs. They discussed the logistics of this for a while, until Kato appeared in the room, announcing that dinner was ready.

The agedashi was fried to perfection, and though it paired nicely with rice wine, Zuko abstained from drinking alcohol in solidarity with Aang. They each had more tea, left to cool in the pot.

“You haven’t met Bumi yet,” said Aang, after he had washed the last of his food down with tea.

“I know, I was hoping to come to Republic City before now. He’s—two months?”

“Yeah,” Aang beamed. He got up and took the seat next to Zuko. “Look.” He reached in his pocket and pulled out a photo of a smiling, chubby-cheeked infant. He looked a bit like Katara, with wild brown hair. 

“Looks like a happy little guy. I like the name.”

“Thanks! King Bumi died just a few months before he was born, you know. He has Bumi’s spirit—it’s the most amazing thing. You’ll see when you meet him.”

“I look forward to it.” Zuko smiled. “Although—I thought only the Avatar had past lives?”

Aang laughed. “I don’t mean it literally.” 

“A possible air or water bender named after an earth bender. Interesting.”

“Well, I _hope_ he’s an airbender,” said Aang.

“What if he’s not?”

“Well, we’re going to have a lot of kids, so it doesn’t matter.”

Zuko took a sip of tea. He and Mai were married not long after his proposal, and Mai’s pregnancy had been grueling for both of them. After Izumi was born, they’d discussed the possibility of more children, but neither were enthusiastic, and though they never officially decided not to, they didn’t discuss it anymore. Izumi was a bit spoiled, but she was a really good kid.

Aang and Katara had gotten married a couple years ago, with a ceremony that was bigger than Sokka’s and Zuko’s combined. It mostly followed old airbender customs, and much to Zuko’s relief there was no wedding party. He and Mai had a small, formal wedding, and they’d had no wedding party either. 

“Well, that’s good,” Zuko said finally. “What about Sokka and Suki?”

Aang laughed. “I don’t think that’s ever gonna happen.”  
“Really?”

“Yeah, I mean—they’re really into their careers, and between you and me, they told Katara they’d rather just be an aunt and uncle than have kids of their own.”

Sokka had recently been appointed to the Republic City Council. He was elected his first run, as Zuko knew he would be. Suki had finally published her book, which was a best-seller, and kept busy with related appearances, meaning she no longer worked as Zuko’s bodyguard. Her book was called Warrior Girl: The Finesse of Fighting by a Daughter of Kyoshi. The Kyoshi warriors had never been called “Daughters of Kyoshi,” but Suki’s publisher thought it was a more marketable phrase.

“That’s—actually pretty cool, good for them.”

Aang smiled, leaning back in his chair. “Anything new around here?”

“Not really. You know Izumi’s taking her proficiency test—”

“Yeah, that’s exciting. I’m sure she’ll do great.”

“She will.” Zuko smiled. “She’s the best. Oh, but, in other news, Azula’s back in prison.”

“Ah,” said Aang, gently setting his teacup down. “Well—I’m sorry?”

Zuko snorted. “Don’t be. When she was free I made sure she stayed far away from me.”

“What happened this time?”

“She tried to kill Haru.”

Aang’s mouth dropped. “ _Haru_? What did he ever do to her?”

“Nothing. I think she was trying to get revenge on Ty Lee.”

Zuko didn’t want to discuss it with Aang, but after Azula was thrown in a prison for the criminally insane he found out that she had, apparently, always been in love with Ty Lee. Suddenly, certain things in his mind had come together with an unpleasant click. Azula’s first mental breakdown came right after Ty Lee betrayed her to save Mai at Boiling Rock, while Mai was betraying Azula to save Zuko. Zuko always thought Azula’s undoing was the thought that people cared about Zuko more than her, but there was more to it.

When Azula discovered that Ty Lee was engaged to Haru, she plotted to murder him. Luckily, her plans were sloppy, and she was still under observation by police following her previous incarceration. There was enough evidence to convict her. Zuko hoped she’d stay locked up forever. He tried so hard to love her, and it always got him burnt. It disturbed him that they had the same proclivity toward their own gender, and served as further proof to Zuko that he’d been wrong back then.

Aang let out a breath. “Wow. I can’t imagine wanting to use someone’s love to hurt them like that.”

Zuko sighed. “I know, but I can’t even blame her completely. She’s just—" he sighed. “Just like my father.” Ozai was also in maximum security prison. “ _Anyway._ Speaking of sisters. Kiyi is going to be very sorry she missed you.”

Aang laughed, lightening the air. Aang had shown Kiyi some air bending tricks at Zuko’s wedding, and from that point on she was completely enamored. She would always ask Zuko if Aang was coming to the Fire Nation, if they could go see him, if he and Zuko hung out a lot, what they talked about. It annoyed Zuko, but it was also cute—and unfortunately, entirely understandable.

“I always thought Kiyi and Tom Tom would date,” said Aang.

“Oh, no way. They’re more like siblings.” After the wedding, Mai’s parents became much more accepting of Zuko as Fire Lord, just as he’d predicted. The New Ozai Society was disbanded once and for all. They started coming to Caldera again, and Mai had become close with her little brother for the first time. He loved babysitting Izumi, which Mai found a bit odd and effeminate, but Zuko was extremely thankful for it. Kiyi did not share this preference. “I’m pretty sure she’s dating some boy from school but she won’t admit it to me.”

“How old is Kiyi now?”

“She turned sixteen in winter.”

“Wow.” Aang smiled, and looked at the wall behind Zuko’s head. “Sixteen. I remember when I was sixteen. I thought I knew everything about _romance.”_ He said the last word in an overly smarmy accent.

“Well,” Zuko said, laughing a bit incredulously. “I guess you did.”

Aang shrugged, still looking past Zuko, chewing on his lip. After several seconds, he met Zuko’s eyes. “That time—at Sokka’s bachelor party—what were you trying to tell me about why you and Mai broke up the last time? It never seemed like she knew, but—I always wondered what you were trying to tell me.”

Zuko felt like the air had been bent from his lungs, but otherwise he felt strangely calm. The blood hadn’t rushed to his face; his heart wasn’t pounding. He blinked slowly, trying to process this new development.

“We’re really going to talk about this?” he asked.

“We can. I mean—” Aang cleared his throat. “I’d like to, if you would.”

“Well.” Zuko traced the corner of his napkin with his pinky finger, starting to feel disassociated from the moment. This conversation had taken such a sudden turn, but wherever it was headed, he was grateful. He had carried this secret’s weight for too long. Now it was time for it to sink, and if his friendship with Aang went with it, well—so be it. “I broke up with her because I thought I was in love with you.”

Aang looked down at his dirty plate. Zuko didn’t dare move until Aang looked up at him again, his cheeks slightly flushed. He swallowed.

“You said—you _thought _—you were. Um. What made you realize you weren’t?"__

__Zuko stared at Aang for several seconds, blinking. Aang was staring back, seemingly awaiting an actual answer._ _

__“Well—you—” Zuko made a small sound of protest. “You got back with Katara.”_ _

__“Did that make you stop loving me?” Aang’s voice was calm, his face inscrutable._ _

__Zuko couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the moment. If he didn’t, he would probably cry._ _

__“Aang, I can’t love someone who doesn’t feel the same, it’s just not—who I _am_. Doesn’t that—make sense to you?”_ _

__“I never stopped.”_ _

__Zuko felt like a tidal wave had washed over him, spinning him head over heels until he didn’t know which way was up. Aang stared down at his plate again._ _

__“What are you talking about,” Zuko breathed, barely above a whisper. It sounded more like a threat than a question._ _

__Aang looked back at Zuko, his gray eyes sparkling, his face finally betraying some sort of inner anguish. “Every day, Zuko. It’s been eight years, and I think about you _every day._ Every second I’ve spent with you since then… it’s like my soul has been on fire.”_ _

__Zuko felt like he was dreaming. “Then why… why did you…”_ _

__Aang made a choked little sound, looking away. “I know. I mean. I could tell, that maybe I wasn’t alone with my feelings. But that was the problem.” He looked back at Zuko. “I love her too. I mean—there was passion, with you, that I never knew existed. But Katara and I have shared so many intimate things. And I knew we could have that—you know, ‘perfect’ life together.”_ _

__“We’ve shared a lot—”_ _

__“I knew that if I pursued you,” Aang pressed on, “it would cause us both a lot of pain, because I need heirs, Zuko.” He gave him a miserable look. “I need airbenders. But…” he sighed. “I often allowed my mind to wander to that night. And what could have been. In another life.”_ _

__“Another _life?_ ” Zuko shouted, the dreamlike feeling disappearing as the blood rushed to his face. “ _You’re_ the only one that gets more than one life. This is my only goddamn life,” he said, pointing his finger at the table forcefully. “I was prepared to give up _everything_ for you!”_ _

__“That’s the problem!” Aang yelled back. He pointed his finger at Zuko. “Look at your daughter’s face and tell me you would give that up! I made the right choice for both of us!”_ _

__“Get your fucking hand out of my face.”_ _

__“Admit it!” shouted Aang, slamming his hand down onto the table. The plates rattled._ _

__They stared at each other for several seconds. Zuko felt rabid. He was ready to leap across the table and tackle Aang to the ground._ _

__“I don’t regret anything,” said Aang, panting and looking wary. “I have a son, and a successful city, and _everything_ is working the way its supposed to. I’m the Avatar. I _have_ to deny my appetites for the greater good. I don’t have any other options.”_ _

__Zuko growled and pushed the table forcefully. Aang was quick, and air bent it away from him. it landed with a crash on the marble floors, the dishes smashing on the ground. The look Aang gave him was even worse than what he’d said, reducing his love for Zuko to an ‘appetite.’ He looked at Zuko as if he was horrible, shocking, beyond redemption._ _

__“Leave here,” Zuko hissed. “And never return.”_ _

__“Zuko.”_ _

__“Leave!” screamed Zuko, bending a wall of fire between them. When he cleared it, Aang was gone._ _

__In a white hot rage, Zuko informed Kato and all his guards that Aang was banished from the palace. If they saw him, they were to prevent his entry by any means necessary. They all agreed to obey these orders, but Zuko saw a hint of fear in their eyes, as if he had gone mad. Well, what if he had? Maybe he was as crazy as his sister and his good-for-nothing father, and so be it._ _

__He went to the palace’s warehouse and had them bring him a war balloon, emblazoned with the Fire Nation insignia._ _

__“Tell Kato I’m leaving,” he informed the warehouse attendant. “I don’t know where and I don’t know for how long. Tell him to inform the Fire Lady.”_ _

__The attendant nodded nervously, and lit the fire in Zuko’s balloon, sending him high into the sky, where stars were starting to make their entrance as the sky turned from purple to black._ _

__After a short flight, he landed safely in the back yard of his family’s vacation home in Ember Island. It was the same house Ozai had owned when he was a kid, though it had been revamped after falling into disrepair._ _

__Once inside, he headed straight to the master bedroom, and crawled under the covers. His rage had left him exhausted, and he fell asleep quickly._ _

__He dreamt about that night in the Ba Sing Se hotel room, but in it they were their current ages. In the dream, Zuko came and pulled his dick out of Aang, panting heavily._ _

__“That was so good,” dream-Zuko said. “Time for your reward.”_ _

__He handed Aang a tiny black box._ _

__“Oh it’s beautiful!” Dream-Aang brandished his hand, which was now sporting the gold engagement ring with a teardrop shaped red sapphire. “It’s what I’ve always wanted.”_ _

__He hugged Zuko. When he pulled away, he was holding Izumi in his arms._ _

__“Daddy!” she cried._ _

__“Zoom?” She had a blue arrow tattoo on her forehead, peeking out beneath her neat bangs. As he stretched her arms toward him he noticed there were arrows on each one. He tried to reach out to her, but realized his arms were already occupied._ _

__He looked down, and saw that he was holding a newborn baby. Zuko saw the wild brown hair and realized it was Bumi. Bumi yawned, turning his face up toward Zuko, and Zuko saw the giant red scar covering Bumi’s left eye, spreading to his tiny ear._ _

__Zuko woke with a start, sitting up in bed. He was sweating. That scarred, tiny baby… He touched his own ear, to make sure he wasn’t still dreaming. It was rough to the touch, and familiar._ _

__Zuko let out the breath he’d been holding and dropped back down to the pillow. He checked his pocket watch, which was lying on the bedside table. It was a little after five in the morning. Dreading lying alone in that room with his thoughts, Zuko got up and changed into his swimming outfit, which was in the drawer where he’d left it last time he was here with Mai and Izumi._ _

__The sun was just starting to rise over the ocean, the beach completely empty. Zuko ran into the sea, diving under the waves. He stood up quickly, spitting out a mouthful of water and rubbing the salt out of his eyes._ _

__He felt something beat unpleasantly against his wet head. He opened his eyes, startled. Some sort of sea bird was circling him. “Get away!” he yelled, sending a stream of fire at the bird. It squawked, then fled quickly._ _

__“This was a stupid idea,” Zuko muttered. He started wading his way toward the shore. When only his feet remained in the water, he felt a sudden sharp pain in the side of his foot._ _

__“Argh!” he yelled, looking down as he kicked involuntarily. A fire crab went sailing, landing in the sand nearby. “Fuck!” He sent another stream of fire at this animal, but it wasn’t as quick as the bird, and was incinerated. Zuko immediately felt guilty, which only added to his anger._ _

__He looked down at his foot, which was bleeding. “Fuck!” he screamed again, his voice wavering. He punched his fists at the ground, sending fireballs over and over to the sand at his feet, melting it until a puddle of glass formed._ _

__“Whoa,” said Zuko, startled. The glass showed him his reflection: hair wet and disheveled, face red, eyes streaming. He flung himself onto his back, feeling wretched._ _

__The sand beneath him began to move, shifting under his body. He sat up and looked around. The palm trees were shaking. A pineconut dislodged from one, hitting the ground with a sandy thud._ _

__Zuko stiffened. It could be sand benders, perhaps assassins. Zuko cursed himself for not bringing guards, even though company was the last thing he wanted right now._ _

__He stood up, readying himself for battle. If he was going to be killed, he was at least going to take a chunk of his killer to hell with him. Standing, he could see over the sandy shore and into his front yard, and that’s when he saw the massive white earth-shaker. Appa._ _

__Aang was sliding from Appa’s back to the ground. Zuko ran towards them._ _

__“How did you find me?” Zuko shouted as Aang strode to meet him._ _

__“I figured that if you wanted to go somewhere I wouldn’t be, it would be here.” Aang sounded calm and determined, his eyes steely._ _

__“Leave here at once,” Zuko hissed. “Or else.”_ _

__“No,” Aang said forcefully, voice raised. “Not until we talk this out.”_ _

__Zuko growled, and shot a fireball at him. Unwilling to see if it had struck, he turned and ran down the beach._ _

__After a several paces, he realized Aang was right behind him, having propelled himself with air bending to catch up._ _

__“Listen to me! I’m sorry!”_ _

__Zuko shot another steam of fire at him, and he jumped away. Zuko kept running._ _

__Suddenly, Aang was on his tail again. “Listen, you fucking baby. I’m—”_ _

__Zuko firebent at him again, and then was suddenly flipped into the air. He landed hard on his back, but was on his feet again with a single jump. He started running once more._ _

__Zuko felt himself get sucked backwards, the air working against him. He heard Aang’s incredulous laughter in his ears. “This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen! What is wrong with you!?”_ _

__Zuko turned to fire bend at Aang, but this caused him to lose resistance, and he was easily sucked into Aang’s grip. In one swift move, Aang had Zuko pinned, flat on his back by the ocean._ _

__“Zuko—”_ _

__Zuko screamed and flipped Aang over, straddling him. He moved his right knee to pin Aang’s left arm to the sand, and held Aang’s right arm down with his left. He lifted his right elbow, conjuring a blowtorch into his knuckles that was about to come down on the Avatar like hellfire._ _

__Aang’s face was brightly lit, and Zuko realized he wasn’t resisting. He didn’t even look angry. He just looked sad, his eyes shining with pain and understanding, his lips parted._ _

__Zuko hesitated, the fire in his knuckles going out. His grip on Aang’s arm loosened._ _

__Aang reached up and grabbed him by the back of the neck, pulling him down into a desperate kiss. Zuko collapsed on top of him, feeling about a thousand pounds. Aang’s mouth was so wet, and they kissed frantically, with no real rhythm, Zuko’s eyes leaking. Aang was pushed into the soft sand by the weight of Zuko’s body, and a wave washed up around him. Zuko wrapped his hand around the back of Aang’s neck and lifted his head from the water, still kissing him._ _

__As Aang dragged his teeth over Zuko’s bottom lip, Zuko came to his senses, and pushed away from Aang, getting on his knees. Aang let his head fall back to the sand, and stared up at Zuko questioningly._ _

__Zuko pulled Aang up roughly by his collar until they were both standing._ _

__“Get in the house. Now.”_ _

__His voice was rough; the anger that he’d felt towards Aang hadn’t died but had merely changed shape. If they had been seen out here, like this, he was going to kill Aang for real._ _

__Aang nodded, and they both made their way quickly across the sand._ _

__Zuko shut the door as soon as they were inside, and then suddenly Aang was on him again, his teeth on Zuko's neck, his hands on Zuko’s hips. Zuko grabbed Aang by the shoulder and slammed him against the wall. He heard a frame clatter to the ground, but didn’t turn._ _

__“Enough,” Zuko shouted. Aang’s eyes were wide, his mouth open slightly. Zuko reached down and ran his hand over Aang’s crotch. His dick was fully hard. Zuko gave his package a hard, not entirely pleasant squeeze._ _

__“Go upstairs. Now.” Aang hurried up the staircase, and Zuko slumped against the door. He couldn’t be doing this again. Not now, not ever. He locked the door, and drew the curtains over the large bay windows._ _

__He climbed the stairs slowly, like a man being led up the gallows, and just as angry. The door to the master bedroom was slightly ajar, and he pushed it open forcefully._ _

__Aang had taken his robes and shoes off, and was standing there in his trousers, looking cautious. Not as if he was afraid of Zuko—more like he was afraid _for_ him, for his delicate emotional state. Zuko slammed the door shut behind him and crossed the room quickly. Aang didn’t flinch as Zuko yanked down his pants and underwear in one motion and grabbed him by the throat. _ _

__“What do you want from me?” Zuko growled, craning his neck so that his mouth was by Aang’s ear. Why did he have to be so fucking tall?_ _

__“I want—you,” Aang gasped._ _

__“You came here to get fucked, is that it?” Zuko had released Aang’s throat and was working on the clasp of his bathing outfit. When it finally came undone, he let the shorts fall to the floor, kicking them away._ _

__“I came here to get killed, I guess,” Aang mumbled. Zuko looked at him. “I want you to destroy me.”_ _

__Zuko blinked at Aang for a few seconds. He was a lot bigger than the last time Zuko had seen him naked, the wiry muscles stronger in his shoulders and arms, his chest and stomach more defined. He was also _bigger_ , his cock bobbing heavily, free of restraint. _ _

__“I can’t kill you if you won’t even put up a fight, so I guess you’re getting fucked,” Zuko said finally._ _

__He grabbed Aang around the waist and pushed him to the bed, so that he was sitting on it._ _

__“Get my cock wet,” Zuko commanded. Without hesitation, Aang took the tip of Zuko’s dick into his mouth, working it in slowly until it came to rest at the back of his throat. It was so good, both the feeling of having his cock engulfed in that hot wet mouth, and knowing that it was _Aang,_ finally, after all these years. Aang moved his head back and forth at a maddening pace until Zuko pushed him away. _ _

__“I don’t have anything else, so you’re going to have to make this nice and thick for me,” Zuko said, wiping a bit of Aang’s spit off his dick with his finger and showing it to him._ _

__Aang nodded._ _

__A red sash Zuko had taken off his robes last night was sprawled on top of the dresser. Zuko grabbed it before straddling Aang. He pushed Aang’s arms behind his back and tied his wrists together tightly, Aang’s beard scratching Zuko’s cheek as he checked his work._ _

__He stood, bringing Aang up with him. Aang swooned in to kiss him, but Zuko turned him around and pushed him to his knees on the bed. He held on tightly to the red sash, keeping Aang upright._ _

__Zuko looked down at his own dick. Aang’s slobber had taken on a jelly-like consistency, thanks to his water bending. Somehow, even though Aang had followed each of Zuko’s commands and was even letting Zuko tie him up, this small gesture resonated with him the most: Aang was his._ _

__He reached around Aang’s hips to stroke his cock, which was hard and heavy. Aang moaned, throwing his head back onto Zuko’s shoulder as Zuko felt his way around Aang’s shaft and balls. Aang’s slit was leaking precome, and Zuko ran his finger through it, feeling his own cock respond similarly._ _

__He pushed Aang down to his shoulders on the bed, and stood back to admire his ass in the air, legs spread and ready. Aang turned his head toward Zuko, panting. Zuko wouldn’t be able to give it to him hard like this, he realized, not without hurting him. And despite his anger, he didn’t want to hurt Aang. With a small flash of fire, Zuko broke the sash, letting Aang’s arms fall to his sides._ _

__He expected Aang to quickly get onto his hands and knees, but he just gave Zuko a smirk and began running his hands over his ass._ _

__“Like what you see?” He spread his ass cheeks open, his big hands almost covering them entirely. Aang’s package hung between his muscular thighs like a blue-striped pendulum, his asshole small and cute and inviting. Zuko realized he’d been staring for several seconds, and looked back down at Aang’s face. He was grinning deviously._ _

__Zuko scowled. “You want to act like a slut? Then I’ll treat you like one. Get on your hands and knees.”_ _

__The smile dropped from Aang’s face as he dropped his hands to the bed, pushing up onto all fours._ _

__Zuko rubbed his cock, getting his fingers slick. He circled his thumb around Aang’s asshole before pushing in slowly. He couldn’t believe how good Aang’s small, muscular ass looked propped up in front of him, the tattoos on his back going down to the cleft. It was even better than he’d imagined, back when he’d dared to imagine it._ _

__“Oh fuck, yeah,” Aang breathed. Zuko moved his thumb in circles, feeling around Aang’s tight entrance._ _

__After a few moments, Aang turned back toward him. “I’m not sixteen anymore, just give me your cock.”_ _

__“Hey!” Zuko pulled his thumb out of Aang’s ass and smacked him across it, hard. “Don’t fucking tell me what to do.” He rubbed the red outline of his handprint on Aang’s cheek as Aang let his head hang between his elbows. “It’s been eight years, you’re not ready. Unless—” Zuko tightened his grip on Aang’s ass. “Unless you’ve had someone else—in here—since then?”_ _

__“I’ve had all kinds of things in there,” said Aang, and for a moment Zuko saw red. “But your cock is the only one that’s ever been inside me.”_ _

__Zuko exhaled, releasing his grip on Aang’s ass to rub his hand up the length of his spine._ _

__“What kind of things?”_ _

__“Dildos. Cocks made out of wood or glass. And sometimes, Katara does this thing with water to make it feel like she has a—”_ _

__“That’s enough!” Zuko yelled, smacking Aang’s other cheek._ _

__Aang gasped, then looked back at Zuko, smirking apologetically. “Well, anyway, I always pretended it was your cock. When I was fucking myself with the dildos.”_ _

__Zuko rubbed his dick against the cleft of Aang’s ass, almost involuntarily. “And when it was Katara?”_ _

__Aang closed his eyes, arching his back. “Then especially. I would yell out ‘Oh, Zuko!’ and she would pretend not to understand me.”_ _

__Zuko growled and reached between Aang’s legs, cradling his balls threateningly. “Now you’re just trying to piss me off.”_ _

__Aang turned his face back toward Zuko, smiling humorlessly, unable to meet his eyes at the angle he was at. “Is it working?”_ _

__Zuko grunted and grabbed his dick, shoving the tip into Aang. He was just as tight as Zuko remembered—whatever activities he’d been up to over the years, that hadn’t changed. Aang cried out as Zuko pushed in deeper, until their balls were touching. He leaned forward, pressing his body to Aang’s, and bit him hard on the shoulder._ _

__“You like pain,” Zuko observed as Aang arched his back, hissing._ _

__Aang panted. “Not enough to stay away from you.”_ _

__Zuko fucked him slowly. He wanted to pound Aang’s ass, to punish him for his cruelty, but he couldn’t. He might never get this chance again, and he needed to savor it. He kissed down the blue inked skin of Aang’s spine, and when that wasn’t enough, he pulled out and turned him over, kissing his fat, wet lips. Aang took the initiative then, laying Zuko down on his back and climbing on top of him. He straddled Zuko’s hips as he lined Zuko’s cock up with his hole, and sunk down, slowly. It slid in more easily this time, and Zuko felt like he was disappearing into Aang’s body, the final ego death that would destroy him once and for all._ _

__After Aang moved up and down on his dick a few times, Zuko sat up, holding him tight. He wrapped his arms around Aang’s strong shoulders, moving a hand up to caress his smooth shaven head. He reached between them to stroke Aang’s dick. Aang ground down on his cock again, whimpering as it found his prostate, and then Zuko was coming, his face buried in Aang’s neck, his entire universe reduced to this one tiny rebirth as Aang’s release covered his hand and stomach._ _

__Zuko’s eyes were wet when he finally pulled away, and as he met Aang’s, he thought his might be too. Aang put his hand on Zuko’s jaw and kissed him slowly. He kissed Zuko’s eyelids and forehead before returning to his mouth. Zuko absently wiped his hand on the sheets, feeling as if his heart had been ripped from his chest and was now moving about the place, doing things to him outside of his control._ _

__“Let me clean you off,” he said gently._ _

__Aang followed him to the washroom, where Zuko wet a towel. He wiped Aang’s come from both their stomachs and then washed his hands, patting everything dry. He found a chipped teacup lying on the counter and filled it with tap water, handing it to Aang, who took a long sip before passing it back to him. Zuko drained it, and set it back down. “Come lay down with me,” he said to Aang._ _

__They huddled together in the bed, Aang’s head on Zuko’s chest, their legs tangled together. Aang was absently fiddling with a lock of Zuko’s hair. Zuko felt drained, emotionally and physically, but he couldn’t stop stroking Aang’s cheek with his thumb._ _

__Aang looked up at him, pulling on the lock of hair. “Are you okay?”_ _

__Zuko blinked, looking away. Aang’s eyes were too big and bright to look at directly when Zuko felt this vulnerable. “I don’t know.”_ _

__Aang rolled forward. He put his hand on Zuko’s chest and leaned on top of it. “I’m sorry.”_ _

__“For what?”_ _

__“I don’t know either.” Aang looked down. “For whatever’s making you not okay.”_ _

__Zuko sighed, running his hand over his face. “I just can’t go through it again. I can’t pretend like this never happened.”_ _

__“We don’t have to—”_ _

__“I can’t be your friend anymore,” Zuko interrupted. Aang’s eyes went wide. “Not _just_ your friend. I know we’re both married, and—fuck, this is the worst thing I’ve ever done to her.” Zuko pinched his eyes shut. “But if this relationship can’t be romantic then it has to be strictly professional.”_ _

__Aang reached for Zuko’s hand, kissing his knuckles. “It can be.” His voice came out in a gruff whisper, and he coughed once, clearing his throat. “Romantic, I mean.”_ _

__Zuko’s heart raced. “What about Katara?”_ _

__Aang sighed. “There’s something I need to tell you about Katara. But it’s going to make you mad.”_ _

__Zuko scoffed. “What?”_ _

__Aang rolled onto his back. Zuko turned towards him, propping his head up with his hand._ _

__“ _What?_ ” Zuko repeated, preemptively mad because Aang thought he should be. _ _

__“So… when Katara and I got back together—”_ _

__“The day after we fucked, yes, go on.”_ _

__Aang gave Zuko a look that was half sheepish, half admonishing._ _

__“Go on,” Zuko repeated._ _

__“Well—she told me that the main reason our relationship hadn’t been working out on her end was that she was polyamorous.”_ _

__Zuko blinked. “What exactly does that mean?”_ _

__“It means she isn’t monogamous. She prefers to date and have sex with more than one partner.”_ _

__“Ah—okay.”_ _

__“So, that was one of the main reasons I was so quick to get back into a relationship with her. We agreed that we would both be polyamorous, and I thought.” Aang blinked a few times. “I thought it meant you and I could be together too. I thought it meant I didn’t have to choose.”_ _

__Zuko mulled this new information over, unsure of what to think. He was so unprepared for it that he felt nothing at all yet._ _

__“But obviously it didn’t work out that way. Right after we got back together, Katara would bring her polyamorous friends around, and I just couldn’t—perform. No matter how attractive they were. At first, I forced myself to have sex with some of the girls, because I thought it would be fun, but I just wasn’t into it. I didn’t care that Katara was; I was happy for her, even. I would make up some excuse to leave, and she would stay. Eventually, she stopped inviting me, and after the first few months I asked her not to tell me what she was up to, you know.”_ _

__“Did you two still—have sex?” Zuko began, his voice much lower than normal._ _

__“Oh yeah, we did. We do. It doesn’t bother me.” Aang smiled crookedly, and Zuko could see that he was telling the truth. “But I realized pretty quickly why I was only interested in having sex with you and Katara.” He reached up to wipe at his eyes; Zuko hadn’t realized they were growing wet. “Because I was in love. With both of you.”_ _

__A chill ran through Zuko. He reached out and put his hand on Aang’s hip, just wanting some part of his body touching some part of Aang’s._ _

__“It wasn’t what we agreed on, you know? Katara and her sex parties, those weren’t about love. I just thought—even if she was okay with it, I couldn’t do that to you. I couldn’t turn you into my—side piece, or whatever. But there were times when I kind of wanted to bring it up, and I’d look at you, and just.” He pinched his eyes shut. “My heart would break and I’d resolve never to even think about it again.” He laughed, sounding choked. “Once I realized the depths of my feelings for you I was afraid they would overtake my life if I gave in. But they did anyway. So here I am.” Aang rubbed his forehead, looking defeated._ _

__“I’m not angry,” said Zuko. He couldn’t quite process how he was feeling, but this much was true. “I know what it’s like to love more than one person.” His heart panged, thinking of Mai and Izumi returning to Caldera to find him gone. “I understand why you didn’t do this sooner. I probably couldn’t have handled it.”_ _

__Aang smiled sadly. “Honestly, me either.”_ _

__Zuko kissed him. “Does Katara know that we slept together?”_ _

__Aang laughed guiltily. “No, actually. I know she’d be cool with it—I mean, she really tried to get me to sleep with guys back in the day—but it always felt like a secret of ours that I was protecting. I did break my own rule once, though, a couple years ago, about asking Katara about her sex life. I asked if she’d ever slept with you. She told me that she wanted to but wouldn’t do so without my blessing, and for the first time ever I told her no.” He laughed again. “I said it was because you were my best friend, even though—” he met Zuko’s eyes. “Well, by that point it wasn’t really true anymore. But she promised me she never would.”_ _

__Zuko kissed the corner of Aang’s eye. “I promise you, she never even tried.”_ _

__Aang laughed. “I wasn’t even suspicious.”_ _

__They both laughed until they started kissing again, and then they didn’t stop until Zuko was back inside Aang._ _

__“Tell me you’re mine,” Zuko said, the sentiment coming out more as a plea than a command._ _

__“I’m yours,” said Aang. As Zuko moved inside him, he knew it was true—Aang was his, and Aang was also Katara’s, and Zuko was going to take what he could get._ _


	6. The Cave of Two Lovers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katara's baby shower brings everyone together... just to tear them apart 

EIGHT YEARS LATER

Zuko had been worried about Druk on his first trip to Air Temple Island, but the hardest part was saying goodbye when the caretakers led him to the island’s caves for the duration of their stay. Zuko had raised Druk from an egg, and though he had recently become a full-grown dragon, he was Zuko’s baby. 

Zuko’s other baby, Izumi, was now twelve, somehow. As Zuko joined Izumi and Mai for a tour around the island, led by one of Aang’s air acolytes, Zuko marveled at how much his daughter took after his wife. He was relieved—his worst fear was bringing another Azula into the world. But Izumi also took after him in her intensity. She was like a miniature adult. 

The bespectacled acolyte, Jingbo, seemed to sense that Mai and Izumi weren’t particularly riveted by the tour, and after a quick lap around the island, he showed them to their quarters in the temple. After they settled in, Zuko led his family to the sitting room to meet the others. 

Aang opened the door and embraced each of them as they entered. Zuko tried not to linger, taking in the scent of him. He smelled like soap and the incense they used in the temple. It had been too long since they’d been alone together, and Zuko could feel it in the tight grip of Aang’s hands on his back: he missed it, too, so bad it hurt. 

Katara was sitting on the loveseat next to Toph, her stomach bigger than Mai’s had ever been with Izumi. She was eight months pregnant with her third child and looked radiant but exhausted. Zuko reached down to hug her. 

Aang and Katara’s second child, Kya, was five years old, and had started waterbending a year ago. It was very bittersweet for them. Aang had become distant and refused to talk about it with Zuko, though he was a supportive dad and bragged about Kya’s achievements all the time to other people. Zuko knew how he really felt. 

Unfortunately, Aang’s plan of filling the temple with airbender babies wouldn’t come true. Katara had extreme difficulty in getting pregnant the last two times, and her healers estimated that it would never happen again. There was a lot of hope riding on this unborn child, and Zuko feared Aang would snap under the pressure he was placing on himself.

Sokka and Suki were there too, as well as Ty Lee, Haru, and their six-year-old twin boys, Zixin and Zhen. Rather than do a traditional ladies-only Water Tribe baby shower, as she had done while pregnant with Bumi and Kya, Katara wanted to celebrate with her closest friends and their families. 

Zuko made himself comfortable on an armchair as Mai and Izumi found seats. A butler was passing around spring rolls on a tray, and Zuko took one. Aang normally didn’t keep butlers, but had hired a few for the occasion. 

The door opened again, and a young man with wild dark hair dressed in all black walked through. “Spring rolls,” he said, and made a beeline for the platter, snatching two. He sat next to Toph, and instead of giving her a roll as Zuko had expected, he devoured both of them.

Unperturbed, Toph turned to Zuko. “This is my boyfriend, Kanto.”

Zuko nodded slowly, and Kanto looked at him. “Whoa. Are you, like—the Fire Lord?”

“Yes,” said Zuko.

“I’m one of your people, man!” said Kanto excitedly, poking himself in the chest with all five fingers. 

“You’re from the colonies,” Toph scoffed. 

“Yeah, but my parents have one hundred percent Fire Nation blood,” said Kanto haughtily. “Nice to meet you, Fire Lord.”

“The pleasure is mine,” said Zuko, not even close to meaning it. There was something about this guy that he didn’t trust, especially when it came to Toph. She was smart but had surprisingly bad taste in men. 

Lunch was served at a long, low table, with Aang and Katara seated on each end. Their kids were screaming and flinging their food the whole time, but Aang and Katara hardly acknowledged it. Izumi, who was sitting next to Zuko, quickly stuffed her face, and then cleared her throat. 

“Um, Miss Katara?”

“Yes, sweetie?” Katara beamed.

“If I may be excused, can I take the children to the turtle-duck pond? I haven’t seen it yet, and I thought they might like to play.”

Everyone hid their laughter; Zuko could tell they thought she was cute for referring to the other kids as ‘the children.’ But really, even though she was only four years older than Bumi, they were worlds apart in maturity.

“That would be great! What do you think?” Katara turned to Kya, who was smashing her peas one by one with her pointer finger. 

“No way!” said Kya. 

“No way!” Zixin and Zhen repeated, squealing with delight. 

“Yeah, let’s go!” said Bumi, jumping up on his seat.

With Bumi on board, the others fell in line, and Izumi led them out. Zuko was grateful and impressed with his daughter. She took after her Uncle Tom Tom for her ability to look after younger kids. 

Sokka poured rice wine into tiny cups and started passing them around. As he reached to hand one to Toph, she shook her head. 

“I’m not feeling so well. I think I’ll pass.”

Sokka blinked. Toph seemed perfectly fine to Zuko, and he never knew her to turn down a drink. 

“Okay,” Sokka said, pulling the glass away.

“Wait!” Kanto reached out and grabbed it. He had already drained the one Sokka handed him moments ago. “I’ll take it.” He proceeded to down the second one just as fast.

Zuko noticed Toph was blushing. He also noticed that her cheeks seemed to be rounder than usual, and—he hated the fact that he could tell, but had her boobs gotten bigger?

Against his will, Zuko’s mind put two and two together, and now he was the one who didn’t feel so well. With a brief glance around the table, it was clear everyone was thinking the same thing. Kanto was oblivious, pouring himself more wine from the carafe Sokka had just set down.

“ _Anyway_ ,” said Toph pointedly, “we should do presents while the kids are gone.”

The way she pronounced the word ‘kids,’ as if it were a mild insult, was disheartening to Zuko, but they all made their way to the parlor where a valet had assembled Katara’s gifts. 

The parlor was a quaint but fancy little room with a waterfall in the corner and wide windows, filling the place with natural light. Comfortable cushions littered the floor for guests to sit on. 

Aang leaned against the windowsill as Katara unwrapped the presents, and Zuko could hardly pay attention to anything else with him there.

Aang was in his early thirties now, so different from that boy who Zuko chased to the ends of the earth. In some ways, Aang seemed much older than Zuko himself. Zuko supposed he was, technically—he’d been born ninety-six years before Zuko had. But the iceberg hadn’t aged him. It was all the stuff that had happened since, and during, that he could not control. 

Aang grinned at one of the presents, some child’s toy. Seeing him smile like that tore through Zuko. It had been over a year since their last fuck when Zuko pushed Aang into a broom closet at their headquarters on the mainland, and sometimes he wondered if Aang wanted him anymore.

As Zuko was thinking this, Aang caught his eye, and something like electricity passed through them. Aang was still smiling, but it was frozen on his face, not quite reaching his eyes, which seemed to be burning through Zuko. Zuko _knew_ , without knowing exactly how he knew, that they were going to fuck as soon and as hard as possible. Somehow, this put him at ease, and when Katara opened his family’s gift he was able to smile warmly, offer an anecdote, give her a hug— he was able to pretend, for a moment, that everything was normal.

After gifts were done, tea was served. A banquet table was set with tiny cakes, tiny fruit tarts, and tiny bottles of water. Mai was telling Ty Lee and Haru a story about a confrontation she had with one of Izumi’s teachers. She looked happy, and Zuko was glad. Over the years he found that the best way to manage his guilt was to simply not think about his affair when he was with Mai. When they were all together like this, it was difficult. But what she didn’t know couldn’t hurt her, and Zuko guessed she’d rather remain blissfully ignorant. In a way, he was protecting her. 

He cleared his throat. “I should go check on Druk.”

Mai turned to him, frowning. “I’m sure he’s fine.”

“I know, but the Air Acolytes aren’t accustomed to handling dragons. I just want to double check.”

“Okay,” said Mai, turning back to Ty Lee.

Aang locked eyes with Zuko. “I’ll walk with you.”

Zuko didn’t trust himself to speak, so he just nodded and stood. No one paid them much attention as they walked out of the parlor together. 

Zuko silently allowed Aang to lead the way. Instead of going south toward the caves, they detoured west, to a secluded part of the temple. Zuko followed Aang down a dark corridor, and as soon as it seemed like they had some cover, grabbed him close. They kissed, Aang pushing Zuko backward into the stone wall. 

Aang pushed Zuko’s cloak off his shoulders, and Zuko undid the clasp on Aang’s robe, letting it fall to the ground. Aang reached into Zuko’s pants, caressing his dick, which was rapidly hardening, and then inching back to rub his fingers along the cleft of Zuko’s ass.

Zuko swallowed down a whimper. “Need it—now—“

“What do you need?” Aang breathed against Zuko’s neck. 

Zuko gasped as Aang’s fingers delved deeper, giving him a hint. “Need you in me.”

Aang flipped Zuko around so that his chest was pressed against the wall. He ripped open the front of his pants, and pushed Zuko’s down. They fell past his narrow hips and pooled on the floor around his ankles. Aang rubbed his naked cock against Zuko’s ass. Though Zuko was in his mid-thirties and didn't seek combat as much as he once had, he still trained regularly, and Aang ran his hands across the smooth muscle as he ground his hips in deeper.

“Don’t make me wait any longer,” said Zuko, smiling in spite of himself. It was rare, over the years, that Aang initiated topping, but it made Zuko feel so wanted, so out of control in the best possible way. 

Aang spat into his hand, easily turning the consistency into jelly, and slicked his dick. He eased into Zuko slowly, and Zuko felt his body change shape, as if Aang’s cock was replacing all his internal organs. Once Aang was fully sheathed, he pulled Zuko’s shirt down off his shoulder, kissing him there.

“God fucking damn,” said Aang. “Ever since you got here this is all I could think about.”

“Us having sex? Or this specifically?”

“ _This_.” Aang pulled out halfway and thrust back in, causing Zuko to grunt. “Oh my god, you feel so good.”

After slowly thrusting for a few moments, Aang stopped. Zuko heard him rustling through his pants pocket, and turned to look. Aang pulled out a tiny glass bottle of water, lifted from the table in the parlor. 

“Surprise,” he whispered. 

Aang opened the lid and drew the water out, making it hover in the air. There was a soft squelching sound as Aang changed its consistency, and Zuko gasped as the thickened water covered his bared dick and begin moving up and down. 

“Oh, fuck,” Zuko cried out. Aang began fucking him hard, his hands tight on Zuko’s hips as his cock dove in and out of Zuko’s under-utilized ass. The combined sensations of his prostate and dick being simulated made Zuko’s whole body feel like it was on fire, and he was so close, so close, so—

The small sound of glass breaking somewhere in the distance brought Zuko back to reality, but it was too late. He was orgasming, splashing the wall with his come as he spasmed around Aang’s cock. Suddenly, Aang was pulling out of him, leaving him feeling bereft. 

“Hey!” Aang yelled, whirling around. Zuko turned. Someone was scrambling with something on the ground. As the person clambered to his feet and ran away, Zuko recognized the wild dark hair. Kanto. 

“Fuck!” Zuko said, his vision clouding with terror. Aang tucked his still-hard dick into his pants as he walked over to where Kanto had been, looking at something on the ground. Zuko pulled his pants up and hurried over. A broken syringe was oozing brownish liquid onto the stone floor. 

“I guess we weren’t the only ones who thought this would be a good hiding place,” Aang said quietly. 

“How—“ Zuko grabbed his hair in two fistfuls, ruining his topknot. “How the _fuck_ are you being so calm right now? He’s going to tell everyone!”

Aang exhaled. “Maybe not. Then Toph would want to know why he was out here.”

“Oh, like he cares what Toph thinks,” Zuko scoffed, his eyes pricking with tears of rage. “We need to find him. We need to—fuck, intimidate him into keeping quiet. I will fucking kill him if I have to, I don't give a shit.”

Aang stared at Zuko for a few seconds, his lips pressed into a tight line. “Okay. Let’s go.”

Zuko was taken aback, but grateful, and they both scrambled into their robes and back in the direction of the parlor, where Kanto had run. Zuko had a sick feeling that they wouldn’t catch him in time, and when they reached the hallway that led to the parlor, they still hadn’t seen him. 

Zuko exchanged a blank look with Aang. _Everything’s fucked_ , he tried to convey. Aang returned his look with an equally blank stare, which seemed to say, _hold it together_. They walked to the end of the hallway, and Zuko fixed his hair quickly as Aang pushed open the door.

Everyone in the room was standing, staring at them. Kanto was next to Toph, panting slightly from running. 

“So, um, Druk is fine,” said Zuko. 

“What the _fuck_ is wrong with you!” screamed Mai. Her face was red.

“I’m going to kill you, Aang.” Sokka’s voice was deadly calm, his eyes like chips of ice.

“Not if I do first,” Suki spat.

“Fuck that, I’m going to kill both of them!” Mai reached into her waist satchel for her daggers at the same time as Sokka reached for his sword and Suki reached for her fan. 

Zuko barely had time to react before Katara screamed, “STOP!” With a wave of her hand, the waterfall's stream jumped across the room and froze Mai, Sokka, and Suki in place. 

Katara was breathing heavily, bowed over from the effort, her hand on her stomach. “No one is _killing_ anyone, for gods’ sake.” She exhaled. “Sokka, Suki—this is absolutely none of your business.” 

“But—“ Sokka began.

“No! And _you_.” Katara shot Kanto a look of pure venom. “You should be ashamed of yourself.”

Kanto put his palms up in the air. “Sorry, dude, sorry! Thought you’d wanna know!”

“So you came in here yelling the news to everyone?"

Kanto scoffed. "Whatever." He slunk away, plopping into a cushion in the corner. Toph shook her head. 

Katara looked from Mai, Aang, and Zuko. “I need you three to follow me to my private quarters. I apologize for freezing you guys, but it had to be done,” she added to Mai, Sokka, and Suki.

She waved her hand again, and the ice broke off their bodies before becoming water, splashing to the ground. Sokka drew Suki to him. They were both scowling. Mai covered her face with her hands, but followed Katara as she made her way out the door. 

Zuko looked at Aang. He was sure his own horror at the situation was reflected quite clearly on his face. Aang, however, looked only wary. Zuko kind of wanted to kill him, too. 

They followed Katara and Mai down the hall. Zuko took long strides to catch up with Mai. He could hear her quiet sobs echoing off the stone walls. 

“Mai, baby, I’m so—“ he began, touching her arm.

“I will fucking stab you if you touch me or speak to me,” she said from behind her hands.

Zuko withdrew his hand, feeling lost. 

“Almost there,” said Katara.

They finally reached a set of ornate doors. Aang bounded forward to open them, and Katara walked through. Mai paused to give Aang a hateful look, before walking through herself. Zuko followed.

He had never been in Aang and Katara’s bedroom before. It was decorated in bright, airy, colors. There was a gigantic four poster bed with perfectly tucked sheets. Zuko wondered, involuntarily, how often they got messed up. 

To the left of the bed two cushy chairs surrounding a small table. There was a low wooden chest next to them, and Aang sat on it as Katara lowered herself slowly into one of the armchairs.

“Mai, please sit,” said Katara, gesturing to the other chair. Mai huffed and sat down, still wiping at her eyes. Zuko hesitated, hovering awkwardly. Katara pointed at the spot next to Aang, and Zuko sat down slowly. 

“Thank you all for following me,” said Katara calmly. “Aang—please explain yourself.”

Aang took a deep breath and looked at Zuko. Zuko didn’t meet his eyes. He wasn’t sure if he wanted Aang to lie or confess, but he definitely didn’t want to choose for him.

“Zuko and I have been having an affair,” said Aang. Zuko closed his eyes. “For eight years.”

Mai made a choked sound of protest. Zuko opened his eyes to look at her, but her hand was covering her face again. 

Katara blinked. “I can’t say I’m not—a little shocked.” She looked at Zuko, then back at Aang. “We agreed to have other sexual partners. I wish you felt that you could tell me.”

“It’s—more than just sex, Katara. I—“ Aang looked at Zuko and swallowed. “It’s emotional too. I’m so sorry.” He hung his head. Zuko’s heart pounded. For a second, he thought Aang was going to say that he loved Zuko, in front of both of their wives. Somehow, they had managed to avoid that word since the confession eight years ago.

“Please, don’t be sorry,” said Katara, her eyes growing misty. “I—I haven’t been truthful to you either. I’ve also been having a close relationship with one of our friends.” Her face fell, and she looked on the verge of tears. Zuko felt Aang stiffen next to him, and was insulted, really, that these words would affect him this way. “I didn’t think you would want to know, either.”

“Who is it?” Aang asked.

“Toph,” Katara hiccuped, with a sad laugh. “Well, not since she’s been with Kanto, but it’s been off and on for a few years.”

“Oh,” said Aang, looking bewildered. His body relaxed. “Oh—okay.”

Katara reached out her hand, and Aang took it. 

“I don’t want to keep secrets from each other anymore,” she said softly. “I love you, and your feelings for Zuko—as well as mine for Toph—they don’t change that.”

“Of course—honey,” Aang moaned, and surged forward to hug her. “I love you, too. Of course this doesn’t change anything.”

Zuko’s blood went cold. It was jarring watching the man who was just inside him telling someone else he loved her. Zuko turned to Mai and opened his mouth, hoping the right words would find him.

Mai stood up quickly, causing the armchair to scrape loudly against the floor. 

“This changes _everything_ ,” she spat. She wasn’t crying anymore, but her eyes were wide, and she was shaking. She looked traumatized. “I need to go.”

“Please,” Zuko said, unsure of what he was asking.

“No.” Mai fixed him with a terrified stare, as if she was afraid of what she wanted to do to him. She turned and ran out of the room. 

“Fuck,” Zuko growled. “Thanks for that, Aang!” He felt ridiculous even as he said it. It was no one’s fault but his own. He walked quickly out of the room and into the hallway. 

The hallway was empty. “Mai!” he screamed. He ran down it, noticing several hallways that branched off. She could be anywhere. After searching one that led to a dead end, he circled back around, shouting with surprise when Aang appeared from a hallway that Zuko hadn’t realized was there.

“You’re going to get lost,” Aang said wearily.

“I need to find my wife!” Zuko yelled. 

“She might be back in the parlor. Let’s go check.”

Zuko scowled, but followed Aang. It was true, he wouldn’t have been able to find the way back on his own. He wasn’t grateful, however, and they walked together in complete silence.

Aang pushed open the door and Zuko followed, not sure what kind of scene to expect.

The first thing he registered was that Mai was not there. Katara had returned before he and Aang, and Bumi and Kya were clinging to her, looking nervous. 

The twins were there, too. Zixin was arguing with Ty Lee, who kept shushing him. Zhen looked as nervous as Aang’s kids, and Haru was absently petting his head, looking over at Zuko and Aang.

“Where’s Mai?” Zuko asked Katara. “And Izumi—did she come back?”

“Zuko,” said Ty Lee, standing up. “Mai left.” She sounded sympathetic, but she was looking at him as if he should have expected this. “She took Izumi home with her on Druk.”

Zuko blinked, hard, against the tears that had suddenly sprung to his eyes, and sat down heavily on one of the cushions. 

He would be foolish to hope that Mai wouldn’t tell Izumi what had happened. They didn’t treat her like a child; she would know something was very wrong. Zuko could handle Mai hating him, but not Izumi. Anything but that. He almost expected Ty Lee to comfort him—they had become close, over the years—but she turned back to Zixin, and Zuko knew he didn’t deserve anything more.

“This is all your fault,” Toph said, in a deadly calm voice. She was turned toward Kanto, boring a hole through him with her sightless gaze. 

“Babe.” Kanto scoffed. “If these two dudes want to cheat on their wives with _each other_ then I don’t see how that’s my fault.”

“It’s also not any of your business!” 

“Oh, okay,” Kanto laughed humorlessly. “ _My_ Fire Lord and the fucking _Avatar_ are perverts. I think that is my business.”

Zuko almost laughed; the situation was so surreal. His darkest secret being discussed openly among his closest friends. He glanced at Aang, who did not look amused. In fact, he looked like he was about to go into the Avatar State. The smile fell from Zuko’s face instantly.

“ _Perverts_?” Toph screamed. “Well, then, I’m a pervert, too, fucker!”

“It’s different for _girls_ ,” Kanto said like it was obvious. 

Toph laughed in a way that was terrifying. “You have got to be the dumbest person I have ever met,” she spat. “You and I are over. I never want to see you again.”

Kanto’s mouth dropped open. “ _I’m_ dumb? Who’s gonna want you now? Big mistake.” He poked her in the stomach.

Toph moved her foot forward and her hands upward, and the section of the stone floor that Kanto was standing on jerked upward. He flew into the wall, landing with a thud. Everyone shouted, surprised.

“You—you—“ Kanto sputtered, mostly mouthing the word. “You—that’s domestic violence!” 

“We’re not together anymore, so it’s regular violence!”

With effort, Kanto pushed himself to his feet. “You want to take the world away from me? Then I’ll take something away from you!” He pushed the door open and ran outside. 

Everyone looked at Toph. The twins were sniffling, and Haru had them behind his back. 

“It might still count as domestic violence,” said Sokka.

“Shh,” said Suki frantically. 

“I just mean, if she needs some advice from a councilman—“

Toph grunted and earth bent the floor back together. “Sorry, guys,” she said sheepishly, turning toward Aang and Katara. 

“It’s okay,” said Katara, looking worried. “But Toph—what did he mean by ‘taking something away from you?’”

“Aw, who the fuck knows,” Toph said, slumping onto a cushion. “Oh, shit—sorry kids.” 

Bumi and Kya boggled at her. 

“Mommy, what’s a pervert?” Kya whispered loudly.

“It’s—a grown-up thing,” said Katara sternly. “Toph, are you okay?”

“I’m good, just a little dizzy,” said Toph, closing her eyes. 

“Um—Toph.” Ty Lee cleared her throat. “I hate to be inappropriate, but after everything that’s just happened, I kinda don’t care! Are you pregnant?”

Everyone gasped at Ty Lee, then turned to Toph.

She started laughing, and then sighed. “Yeah.”

Suki covered her mouth. “And it’s _Kanto’s_?”

Toph laughed again. “Well, yeah, Suki, I’m not _that_ big of a whore. God dammit!” She looked around. “I keep forgetting there are kids here!” 

“Eh, they’re already traumatized,” said Sokka, waving his hand. Haru glared at Toph, pushing his sons further behind him.

“Anyway, it doesn’t matter. This kid’s better off growing up without an idiot for a father. I’m enough Mom _and_ Dad for him,” said Toph lovingly, stroking her stomach. 

Zuko looked at Aang, alarmed. He had never seen Toph express affection for anything. 

“It’s a boy?” Aang asked.

“Jeez, Aang, do I look fat enough to know that yet?” Toph said, still smiling. “I just have a feeling.”

“Well, congratulations,” said Suki, awkwardly. The others mumbled similar sentiments. 

Katara quickly thanked everyone for coming, then dragged her children out of the room. Bumi had a lot of questions about what why everyone was mad at his dad, and why Aang cheated on Katara. It sounded to Zuko like Bumi didn’t know what that meant exactly, but he would learn. Maybe today, maybe sometime in the future. But Bumi would know what had happened between Zuko and his father when he did.

And Izumi would know. Zuko was sure she already did. There was no way Mai would want to be with him anymore, and Izumi deserved an explanation.

“We better get going, too,” said Haru, slightly accusatory. 

“Yeah,” Ty Lee said. “Come on, boys. Let’s get our things.”

The twins followed their parents quietly, more obedient than Zuko had ever seen them.

Aang looked at Zuko wearily, and then at the others. “Well. You’re all welcome to stay as long as you want. But I think the celebration is over. Sorry, everyone.”

Sokka sighed. “Sorry I tried to kill you, Aang. I don’t know what’s going on between you and my sister, but—well—that’s your business.” He clapped Aang on the shoulder once, then turned away awkwardly, his eyes darting to Zuko. 

After Sokka, Suki, Toph, and Zuko retrieved their still-packed luggage, Aang walked them to the docks. There was no way Appa could carry all of it, so Aang was letting them use his small fleet of boats. When they got to the dock, Aang started laughing.

“What?” asked Toph tentatively. She hated traveling by sea, and since she was standing on the wooden dock, Zuko knew she was already unable to see with her earth bending. 

“One of the boats is missing,” said Aang. “I guess I know what Kanto was planning to take from you. Except, well. He took it from me.”

“Ugh,” said Toph. “Sorry. I’ll get you a new one.”

“Please, don’t,” said Aang, hugging her. “It’s worth it just to be rid of him.” He held the embrace longer than usual, and when they pulled apart, looked into Toph’s face.

“Be good to her, okay?” he said quietly. Sokka and Suki were already loading their luggage into one of the boats, and couldn’t hear them.

Toph’s face softened. “You, too.” She quickly grabbed the handle of her suitcase and walked toward the sound of Sokka and Suki’s voices with slow, measured footsteps. 

Aang turned to Zuko. Zuko swallowed.

“Everything’s ruined,” he said, not caring if he sounded pathetic.

“It’s not,” said Aang.

“You don’t understand.” Zuko sighed, the empty feeling in his chest spreading through his body. "It's not the same for you."

“I—“ Aang bit his bottom lip, reaching for Zuko’s hand, holding his fingers loosely. “I know. I’m sorry.”

“What happens now?” 

Aang’s wide gray eyes searched Zuko’s. “This, I guess.”

He put his hand on Zuko’s jaw and pulled Zuko’s mouth to his. They didn’t move, just pressed their mouths together for several seconds, before Aang pulled away.

“I love you, Sifu Hotman,” he whispered. “I’ll love you til the day I die, and in the next life, and the next.”

Zuko closed his eyes and put his hand over Aang’s on his jaw. “I love you too, Aang. Thank you.”

When he finally dumped his, Mai’s, and Izumi’s suitcases into the boat, no one mentioned having spied on his goodbye with Aang. Sokka untied the rope that held them to the dock, and they floated, untethered, into nothing, toward everything.


End file.
